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Self-Will

In the archives of Alcoholics Anonymous, the topic of self-will is addressed as a primary barrier to sustainable recovery. While willpower is often mistaken for a solution, these recordings emphasize that the self-centered drive to control one's narrative, maintain a facade of strength, or manipulate circumstances is often the very engine of the addiction. The core principle explored here is the transition from self-reliance to spiritual surrender, recognizing that a bankrupt self-will must be replaced by a reliance on the program, a higher power, and the support of a community. Listeners can expect raw, first-hand accounts of the failure of the ego. From the collapse of macho projections and professional facades to the exhaustion of trying to manage life's chaos through deception, these speakers detail the moment they realized their own will was their greatest obstacle. The tapes provide insight into the humbling process of stripping away the ego—described by some as a painstaking sculptural process of removing defects—to reveal a more authentic, vulnerable self. Through these narratives, the listener will hear how abandoning the need for control and embracing humility allows for a profound shift from isolation to connection, ultimately leading to a peace that willpower alone could never achieve.

71 tapes

All Tapes

Local AA Speakers
Step 3 – Joe and Charlie – Part 1 of 3 – 2021 – Local AA Speakers
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Chad P.
Step 3 – Step-Tember to Remember Workshop – Part 3 of 7 – 2025 – Chad P.
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Mark H.
Big Book – Mad Dog Recovery AA Speakers Workshop – Part 2 of 2 – 1997 – Mark H.
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Mark H.
Steps 1, 3, 4 and 5 – Mad Dog Recovery AA Speakers Workshop – Part 1 of 2 – 1997 – Mark H.
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Chad P.
The Internal Condition That Makes External Circumstances Better – Chad P.
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Russell S.
Two Neurons Waving Goodbye to Each Other – Russell S.
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Don H.
Why Some Amends Are Too Dangerous to Attempt – Don H.
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Tara R.
Tara R. at the Appalachian Roundup – 2024
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Julie A.
Julie A. at the Don’t Sweat the Summer Big Book Workshop – 2025
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Howard E.
Why the Big Book Says ‘Suggested’ as a Subtle Command – Howard E.
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Howard P.
Low Self-Esteem and the Entanglement of the Past – Howard P.
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Charlie P.
Charlie P. Discusses the Set-Aside Prayer and Staying Willing for a Higher Power
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Jessica S.
The Agnostic Experiment and the Contempt Prior to Investigation – Jessica S.
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Belia A.
Why Expectation Is a Risk to Mental Health – Belia A.
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Risa M.
The Decision to Stop Playing Higher Power – Risa M.
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Father J.
The Selfish Motive for Staying Sober – Father J.
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Sandy B.
The Bondage of Self and the Actor Who Runs the Show – Sandy B.
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Glenn
Why the Big Book Says ‘Probably’ on Page 60 – Glenn
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Katie P.
The Danger of Meeting-Based Sobriety – Katie P.
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Cyndi M., Olis S., and Theresa F.
The Spiritual Malady as Anything That Separates Me From You
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Bob D.
Bob D. on the Spiritual Malady, Agnosticism, and the Working Hypothesis — Part 3 of 11 — Sandy B.
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Mark H.
Steps 10 and 12 – Part 4 – Mark H. – FOTSNY – 2001
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Chris A.
Springtime in the Ozarks Big Book Study – Part 3 – Chris S. and Charlie P. – Eureka Springs, AR – 2010
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Chris A.
Springtime in the Ozarks Big Book Study – Part 2 – Chris S. and Charlie P. – Eureka Springs, AR – 2010
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To G.
The Sponsor Who Never Graduated High School Dismissed My Doctorate With a Thermometer Joke – To G.
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