Why the Big Book Says ‘Suggested’ as a Subtle Command – Howard E.

My name is Howard Ebert. I'm still in alcohol. Just a brief disclaimer for those of you who are new here, welcome. Welcome. Please keep coming. um if you're new and you haven't sent us your email address please do so it'll remain up here on our box the big book study at aol.com that way you can get on the list to receive all of the information that's put on the screen during the meeting some meetings have a lot of screen shares some meeting not so much but you can give them all by sending us your e-mail address and we'll make sure you're covered uh by way of disclaimer i do not mean to set myself up as an authority or a guru on the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous. I am a fellow traveler, a fellow student on a very broad highway of interpretation. I say that so that if you can't reconcile what you hear with what you find on your own, all I ask is you give it a second thought. If you still can't jive what you hear, with what you think, write it down. Let's discuss it at the coffee shop meeting after the meeting um that's the opportunity to discuss these things just make a note as we go along this meeting is obviously too large to have an open discussion with 150 people but we try and do a little bit better with the coffee shop meeting afterwards and uh i didn't see it in the announcement so i do want to make this uh known our monday night deep dive where we start take the big book a couple of paragraphs at a time uh and we have a guest facilitator each month this month lovey our friend lovey from bermuda has been guiding us reading a few uh chap a few paragraphs and then speaking on it and i'm very proud to announce that for the month of november our friend yung lee has agreed to take over for the whole month and do the uh reading and sharing on that material so it's definitely the place to be okay last week we started actually reading how it works uh we spent the weeks before talking about what it looked what the environment was when this chapter was written uh the fact that bill had everything else except for chapters uh five and six written when he sat down to do this and there's a lot of controversy about fighting back and forth about every word whether they did or didn't uh it's pointless we talked about it already we're not going to beat that to death right now we're just going to continue with our book study of what's actually survived and what is important is what's in the book not how it came about what's important is What's Here because this I believe is what God gave us all the other stuff is noise so we're on page uh 58 the chapter is called how it works and the it is the program i know we started last week and we did about four or five lines and i'm going to go through them as well just uh rather than starting in the middle of a paragraph but how it worked works w-o-r-k-s it doesn't say worked, it still works today. So how it works is the same as it was then and as it is now. Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Please underline that word thoroughly. And just to answer that question comes up once in a while, rarely versus never. Bill said he never considered making that change. If you go to world services on their i think on their intro page and the frequent that frequently asked questions one of the first questions is rarely versus never and they explain that he never considered doing that that's just an apocryphal story that has come attached to this book rarely have we seen a person feel who has thoroughly and please underline thoroughly followed our path those who do not recover are people who please underlie cannot or will not and circle please the word completely. Give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. You may want to underline that word honest because it's going to appear three times in this first paragraph. But I want to draw your attention to the other two words, thoroughly and completely. Thoroughly and completely we have to give ourselves thoroughly and completely to this program um i'll give you a few other examples of it if you'd like don't lose your place here but if we go to the uh forward to the first edition which in my book is page xiii it says we of alcoholics anonymous what i want to do is draw your attention to the fourth line which says to show other alcoholics precisely how we have recovered so underline or circle that word precisely so we have thoroughly we have completely now we've added precisely if we jump to page 20 the second paragraph is the purpose of this book to answer such questions specifically circle outwards specifically so we have thoroughly completely precisely specifically and the last one is on page 29 pop it a page 29 further on clear cut directions and circle clear cut so we have thoroughly completely precisely specifically clear cut you think he's trying to tell us something this is the level of commitment that we need to make to this program in order for it to work. And I drew a parallel last week that may, I don't know, may help a little bit. As Kathy knows, my favorite meal is bacon and eggs. I can eat bacon and eggs three times a day, seven days a week. It's very easy for me. But in that meal, we have two sources of the food. We have the chicken who gave us the egg and we have the bacon uh which came which came from the pig the chicken was involved in the process the chicken didn't give thoroughly completely precisely specifically the chicken just gave us an egg the pig there in any case the pig was committed the level of commitment that that pig had. He gave thoroughly, completely, precisely, etc. There's the difference between being involved, which is coming to meetings, don't drink and go to meetings expecting something to happen. And then after a while, stop going because AA doesn't work for me. And you're right, we failed you. We didn't get to you to tell you that just sitting in that chair for an hour is going to kill you it's going to kill you there's work there's actual work to be done in a 12-step program so the point here Bill is telling us thoroughly completely that we have to be serious about our level of commitment to this program give themselves to the simple program usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest and that word constitutionally is interesting I tried to use that as a hook to hang my hat on when I first came in, saying, well, it's all work for me because I'm constitutionally incapable of being honest. And my first sponsor told me, if you could understand that word constitutionally, it doesn't apply to you. So he stole that from under me. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault. They seem to have been born that way They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands. Let's circle demands again along the lines of completely thoroughly. We've got demands. Demands you may want to circle in green because it's a must. Maybe Bina will put in the chat the color codes that we use for highlighting, but when it comes to musts, we highlight in green. we highlight prayers and promises in pink uh as we go along when we when we approach references to approach we we highlighted in blue and recovered references are an orange everything else i guess is yellow and it's up to you you don't have to do that okay um which demands rigorous honesty their chances are less than average please underline less than average so we're talking about people who are incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which requires rigorous honesty but he bill is telling us that their chances are not absolutely zero nil he's saying their chances are less than averaged we know from the forward to the second edition that the success rate of doing what it says to do in the book is about 75 percent. If you didn't, if you can't do what it says to do in the book, well, you may still get it, but your chances are less than average. There's a point to be made here because there is a group whose chances are zero and we haven't gotten to that yet. So he says the chances are Less Than Average. There are those two who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. Please underline capacity to Be Honest. There's the catch. People may have all kinds of other problems, all kinds issues going on. But if you at least got the capacity, the ability to be honest, you can recover. You can have a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps and take other people to that point. So your chances are less than average, but they can happen. It can happen. The next paragraph, please, the first two lines we're going to highlight. uh everyone usually looks at these two lines as instructions for telling their story and that's not entirely untrue but let's go through it our stories describe in a general way what we used to be like underlying what we use to be and above it please write God's will, a self-will. What it used to be like on self-willed. It doesn't say what it used to be tell your war story. Talk about all the things you drank and all the drugs you took and all the arrests. No, it doesn't saying that. What was life like running on self will? That's what we need to tell. And the next thing we have to tell, let's underline what happened. Underline what happened and what happened is a spiritual revelation we had a spiritual revelation we were running our life on self-will we did something had a spiritual revelation and the end result let's underline what we're like now and above that right running on God's will that's what we are supposed to be doing when we tell our story but Bill doesn't leave it at that he tells us how to what what to put into our story in several other places. And I'm going to take a minute to go through it, because I think it's really important that too often someone tells their story, they waste a whole lot of time on the war story and not nearly enough time on the rest of what we're supposed to be talking about. So just to make the point a little bit better, let's take a look at page 29. Don't move from this page. But if you turn back to page 29. Here's another piece of instruction about what to do when you tell your story. A paragraph begins with each individual. Here is what you do when you tell your story, and I've personalized this paragraph. I changed these to my. For example, each individual, in other words, I, in my personal story, describe in my own language and from my own point of view, the way I establish my relationship with God. These give a clear-cut section of our membership and a clear cut idea of what has actually happened in my life. So I'm supposed to be telling you of my journey from self-will to god's will and that journey involves 12 steps telling about my journey in terms of the 12 steps there's another reference to this if we jump ahead now to page 50 paragraph 2 don't leave don't lose 58 but let's just go ahead to page 15 because we're going to be thorough we're to be thorough. On page 50, the second paragraph says in our personal stories, I hope you all see that. If I'm running too fast, let Bina know in the chat and we'll try and slow down. But it says at the second paragraph, in our personnel stories, you'll find a wide variation in the way each teller approaches and conceives of the power which is greater than himself. So when you tell your story make sure you tell how you approach and conceive of that power greater than yourself and if we've been reading up to this point the stories in the back of the book the call to action for step one will be able to see these things especially when we're talking on pgv8 about our stories disclosed in a general way yeah those are the stories yep those arethe stories we're talking about those are stories we mentioned in the forwards um let's uh last reference i'm going to bring you to is page 58, which is what we just read. So there's a couple of examples, and there are a few more, but there's A couple of Examples of that. I see there's one or two hands up, but we really don't go through hands right now. Is there some issue I can help you with? We'll make an exception here. Robert, did you have something you want to ask me? richard richard yeah sorry i i just put i just entered the meeting i put my hand up oh sorry about that i'll put it down okay hang around after the meeting for the discussion okay all righty getting back to the text so we've under highlighted those two uh lines Now, please highlight the rest of the paragraph. This addresses something that it astounds me how often the question gets asked. And that question is, when should I start working the steps? We read it at the beginning of every meeting. Someone reads how it works. And in it we say the following. If you've decided you want what we have, and we'll come back to what we have, and are willing to go to any length to get it, underline go to any length to get it, then you're ready to take certain steps. There it is. That's when you start working the steps. When you see what you want in others in this program and are willing to go to any lengths and willing to go to any lengths is not coming out to a meeting in a blizzard the reference of going to any lengths is steps that's going to any lengths working those steps what we have now here's another little fun exercise he says if you decided you want what we have well what does it exactly that they have? Well, a while back, if you take a look on page 25, we highlighted on page 25 what I call the AA brochure that tells what we have. So if you've decided you want what we have and here's what we Have on page twenty five, the paragraph that begins with there is a solution go three lines up from the bottom of that paragraph and it says the following we have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed. The great fact is just this and nothing less that we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude towards life which is the uh mental dimension toward our fellows which is the physical dimension and toward god's universe the spiritual dimension the central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous he has he has commenced to accomplish those things for which for us, which we could never do by ourselves. If you decided you want what we have, read our brochure, page 25. If You Want That, Here's a Way to Get It. Simple. What we have is not what car you're driving, what house you own, what job you have. No. Page 25. That's what we have and if you want that and you want that with every fiber of your being and you're willing to go through whatever the steps ask you to do which is really quite simple and you can have it you can have it it's there for the taking okay back to page 58 bottom paragraph at some of these we bought we thought we could find an easier softer way what are some easier softer ways than just working the steps how about the obvious just going to meetings how about holding back on some steps i did that for 24 years in recovery um i i was very open at meetings so i didn't feel i had to uh do a fourth or a fifth step because every time I went to a meeting, I shared openly. I didn't need to do a fifth step because I shared overly. I did not ever hurt anybody. In my mind, I did. I needed to do an eighth and ninth step. My picking and choosing which steps to work, holding back on the ones I didn't want to was i worked step one two three twelve that was it well there's an easier softer way for you and it got me into a relapse twice um here's another how about another one no sponsor easier soft away no sponsor and the other side of that coin is several sponsors that's not a thorough program that's an easier soft way you're shopping for your answers if mom doesn't tell you what you like want to hear you go dad that don't work we go to grandpa or grandma we'll get the answer we want we have a sponsor to guide us so those are some easier softer ways and He says, but we could not. Please underline this with all the earnestness at our command and earnestness just means determination with all of the determination at our demand. We beg of you and please circle that word beg. It's the second reference. Second time. It's only used twice in this book. We beg a view. To be fearless and thorough from the very start. Please highlight and underline this last sentence, because here's where you go to zero chance of recovery. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas, and above old ideas write self-will, and the result was nil. underline please uh twice the word nil nil means zero none nothing until we let go absolutely and underline let go Absolutely. And above it, please write except God's will. There's the person who has experienced a zero chance of recovery. Zero, not less than average. If you've got a lot of problems and you're kind of mixed up in a lot of ways, if you've got the capacity to be honest, you can recover. Your chances may be less than zero, but you can do it. You can do it. I've seen a lot of people do it, but if we hang on to our old ways, in other words, self-will still is at the core of our existence. We still ask that question, what's in it for me? Why should I do it what what do i get out of it me me me if i stay like that my chances of recovery are zero zero until i accept god's will pretty stern statement pretty strong statement last line remember remember why is the bill telling us to remember well because back on page 24 it told us that at certain times we were unable to bring into mind the pain and the suffering that drinking brings with it so he's trying to point out here remember that remember you deal with alcohol cunning baffling powerful underline please without help it is too much for us may but there is one who has all power that one is God please highlight and underline that that's the foundation of the first three steps. May you find him now! Circle, underline, exclamation point at that word now. Now. There is a sense of urgency that has been expressed and will continue to be expressed by Bill here because once we get started we need momentum. If we don't we're going backwards. Sometimes we hear there's little myths in the meetings that um and we're all about busting myths here and how alcohol is only mentioned in the first step and you know all right through your book if you stay around you'll see the threads and the mentions and the warnings of alcohol yeah and he just wants us to remember don't forget about it just because i don't bring the word up every two seconds remember it and if you need to know what to remember you may want to under the word remember right see page 24 paragraph 1 because that's what we need to remember 24 paragraph one we are unable at certain times to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering yada yada that's What We Have To Remember as Kathy pointed out okay back to page 59 please underline half measures availed us nothing back on page 17 we were introduced to this notion of the two elements necessary for our recovery the common peril having shared a common peril which is our our history being we have an allergy and an obsession we share a common parallel and we have a common solution which we have found which are the 12 steps. Those are the two elements of the cement which bind us together. So if you need a point of reference where it says half measures avail us nothing, you may want to write see page 17 where he talks about the common peril and the common solution are the 2 elements of this cement which bind us together that one without the other is insufficient. Insufficient. You can't make cement without water not going to work um we stood at the turning point and please highlight this next sentence in pink it is a step two prayer we ask his protection and care with complete abandon i love that he started the turning white i'm not turning out anymore i'm going to turn into myself I like that yep trying and complete abandon you make if you underline that complete abandon just means to fully commit we started out today talking about that thoroughly completely precisely specifically you think he's trying to tell us something here doesn't say surrender does that no and it doesn't stay surrender nor does it say surrender anywhere in the first 164 pages i would hope that most of you are aware of that because i know i've said it many times but if haven't heard it let me repeat it the word surrender does not appear anywhere in the first 164 pages of this book okay um here are the steps we took please underline we took which are, and underline and highlight this please, suggested as a program of recovery. This is not a program of suggestions. Somehow we have taken that sentence and bastardized it to mean something totally different. a program of suggestions is not the same thing as a suggested program. If you look up the word suggested in the 1939 dictionary it's defined as quote a subtle command or strong recommendation Fortunately it's not a it's not a it's not like i'm going into mcdonald's and i get to check off what i want and what i don't want right either take the whole meal or i don'T bother that's it entirety it's a happy meal no substitutions period um it's suggested as a program of recovery again suggested Suggested is defined as a subtle command or strong recommendation You're about to jump out of the plane with a parachute on your back And the guy who's standing there by the gate tells you Now when you're about halfway down, I suggest you pull this red cord So that the parachute will open up You don't have to do that But you'll have a much softer landing if you do so i'm going to suggest you pull this red cord when you're halfway down otherwise as woody guthrie says so long it's been good to know you that's the suggestion period okay um so let's keep that in mind this is a suggested program we take it in its entirety this is not a buffet we don't take what we want from this and leave that you cannot pick and choose the steps that we work if you want it the result that we're given in the top first part of the 12th step a great promise the greatest promise we offer anyone spiritual awakening as a result of these steps if you Want That You Must Do Like It Says As A Result Of These Steps Not As A result of some of these steps, all of these steps. Now what I'm going to suggest you do, we're going to break this page down a little bit and maybe we could do this. Andy, can you give me five, six, please? What are your handouts this week? Looks like this. uh can you shrink that down a little bit yep okay so what i want to ask you to do we'll take it one thing at a time is the first three steps in your book on page 59 if you put a bracket first three stops is a bracket and on the left side of the bracket right spiritual dimension The first three steps apply to the spiritual dimension, getting right with God. Then bracket steps four, five, six, and seven, and those steps concern the mental dimension. So we're getting rightwith ourselves in those steps. We get rightwithourselves in the mentaldimension. then we bracket steps eight and nine and those two steps concern the physical dimension which is the world and everything in it everyone in it so in those two Steps we get right with our fellow man and I know this is going to be a little hard because 12 Step 12 is on another page but if bracket 10 11 and 12 those three steps are not maintenance steps please don't call them maintenance steps mate to maintain means to keep something the same which is not only impossible but it's also something that we is very dangerous to believe it can happen we need to keep moving forward we need continued spiritual growth so that's why i call 10 11 12 continued growth steps, not maintenance. And Andy, leave this up for a minute as I go through it. So we're going to add a few things. Let's go through the steps one by one. One, we admitted we were powerless. Underline like it says, admitted we were powerless over alcohol. and don't forget the dash there is a dash there that our lives have become unmanageable above underlying unmanegeable and above that right spiritual malady remember going back we said we have a three-part disease a spirit a physical allergy a mental obsession and a spiritual malady so above where it says admitted we were powerless over the word powerless right allergy obsession so the first part of the 12 steps apply the first part of step 12 applied to first part or step one sorry applies to the three parts of our disease the allergy and the obsession make us powerless the spiritual malady keeps our lives unmanageable step two please underline came to believe it doesn't say came to know doesn't stay came to have faith it says came to belief that there is a power that could could and underlying could restore us to sanity and above sanity right the ability to see the truth or the ability to know the truth because i thought by the time i got to the second step i'm not drinking and drugging anymore i have been restored to sanity so what are you talking about i did a lot of crazy stupid things when i was drinking but i'm not doing that anymore well that's not what they mean by sanity in the second step, restored to sanity, is the mental state of mind where you recognize the truth all the time. We never fall prey to believing in a lie because when we believe in a lie, we take action based on it and when you take actionbased on a lie, you will eventually run smack into the truth and your life becomes a living hell. Third step, please underline and Maybe I want to highlight the first three words, made a decision, because that's all the third step is about. I go to meetings where the topic is the third steps, and all they talk about is turning something over. Well, that's not what the third-step says to do. The third step says to make a decision. Come to a conclusion of your mind as a result of reading Bill Tells Us. As a result of the reading, and we're going to come to that in a few minutes, up to this point, we're ready to make a decision to pursue this power greater than ourselves. So all we do in the third step is make a Decision. What we make a Decision to do is to turn our will, and above will, write the word thought. Thoughts. And above the word lives, write actions. so we're going to make a decision to do something the end result of which is turning over our thinking and act action mechanism to the care of our creator but we don't do it here we do it as a result of the work that follows we make a decisio n to do this work four five six seven eight and nine the end result is we have turned over our thinking and our living to god step four made a searching and fearless moral inventory above the word moral please write truth and on and since it's already underlined please do underline moral inventory and the word inventory, above it write list. L-I-S-T. Somehow it became acceptable to think that this fourth step is about writing out your life story. Don't know where that came from. The book tells us very clearly in the instructions that are coming in a week or so about how to approach these steps. It tells us make a list and then make another list and dann make another lista. At no time does it say to write out a story later in the fifth step it says tell a story but we're writing out something now and what we're reading even if you don't have the book to back it up if you have a dictionary and you're handed the assignment of make a make a moral inventory of yourself and you look up the word inventory in a dictionary it's going to tell you make a list that's what inventory is an itemized list and then once we do that in step five we admit to god above god right spiritual we're going to get these three dimensions hooked up right here in the fifth step admitted to god spiritual dimension to ourselves mental dimension to another human being physical dimension the exact nature of our wrongs circle the word wrongs please i'll explain why in a minute step six were an underlying entirely ready because that's what step six is it's not a big deal i was in a meeting a while back where a guy said he's been working on step six for two years i don't know i don' t know how you could do that i just don't know how that could possibly be done because all step six is is looking at what the information we got out of a fourth and fifth step and saying i don''t want to be that way anymore i'm entirely ready to change that's all it says in step six we're entirely ready to have god remove all these and please circle the word defects we'll come back to why in a moment step seven probably the most important and most misunderstood step of all humbly ask them to remove our shortcomings humbly asked and originally if you remember the step said humbly ass on our knees that was taken out we humbly ask him him means god because it's got a capital h to remove our shortcomings and circle shortcomings please now why have i done that step five says wrong step six says defect step seven says shortcomings is there a difference between those bill was constantly asked that what's the difference between a wrong here and a defect there and a shortcoming there and his answer was always no they mean the same thing i was just taught in basic composition in english and in college and high school to try and avoid repeating the same words When you repeat something over and over and Over again It's a demonstration of a lack of intelligence You know what I mean You know What I mean Huh You know What I Mean You know What I Mean It's A lack Of Intelligence So Bill Chose Different Words They Mean The Same Thing There's More Than Ample Writing Of Bills To Substantiate That They Mean The Same Thing Let's Not Look For lofty explanations between the three words the guy who wrote it said they mean the same thing you want to interpret it differently that's your interpretation the author said no they mean the same step eight underline the first three words made a list of all you may want to circle at all persons we had harmed and underlined became willing to make amends to them all, circle all again. Are we going out and making amends to everyone? No. All we're doing in step eight is making a list. The same way in step three we were making a decision to do something. And then in step six we were entirely ready to God come in and do something and in step eight we're making a list we're getting ready to do something else make a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all and there's the catch we became willing and you'll see when we get to this step is one of the ways we become willing to make Amends to the people we said we'd never make amens to is by making all the other amends and we'll see by the time we get to those difficult impossible no never amends we're ready to make them we're ready but for now all we have to do in step eight is make a list of those things we're not going to make amends today step nine the the simplicity of this step is extraordinary how bill manages to put so much information in so many directions in one sentence in this one sentence he tells us three things what type of amends when to do it when not to do it made direct amends there's what typeof amends direct eye-to-eye nose-to nose face-to face not by text not by email not by phone call now there are circumstances which may warrant stuff like that and we'll talk about that later on much later on but for now the step says made direct amends eye to eye nose to nose when do you do it please notice the word wherever possible i've heard this step read the wrong way so many times and it's silly because i've read people have heard people say may direct amends to such people whenever possible it doesn't say whenever it says wherever if you tell an alcoholic to do something whenever he can it ain't ever going to get done so it says whenever possible and the difference between those two words in the dictionary is wherever implies urgency and whenever implies convenience this is not a matter of convenience there's an urgency here so we do it wherever possible except when to do so would injure them or others that's when we don't make a direct amends doesn't take us off the hook for making a demands making an amends there are amends that we just can't make direct because if we do, it would hurt somebody And we're not here to do that. So we make indirect demands. We find a way. Doesn't let us off the hook. We have to be on the hook. Don't you want to be free of the past? Well, get on the hook okay uh step 10 continued please underline continued remember these are the continued growth steps continued what to take personal inventory please underlined personal and when we were wrong promptly admitted it another step that's grossly misunderstood and i'm not even going to begin to get into them now get into it now but this step that says so little or continue to take personal inventory when wrong promptly admitted says so very much step 11 sort through prayer and meditation above the word prayer please write asking and above meditation please write listening to improve and underline this please our conscious contact with god as we understood him so we seek to enhance our vital sixth sense of god consciousness because that's what six the 11th step is about deepening and enhancing our vital sixth sense everything we know we learn through our five senses but we have to develop a method of communication with our creator where the five senses can't come into play i can't communicate that way everything i see hear taste touch and smell those are my five uh senses won't work here so i have to find another way to communicate and that's through prayer which is asking and meditation which is listening step 12 is a three-part step the first part i'm going to ask that you highlight in pink having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps that's the promise that's a prayer the step is made up of three things a promise i'm sorry a promise a charge and a challenge this is the promise that if you work the rest of these steps you will have a spiritual awakening and a spiritual awakening is defined as a personality change sufficient to recover from a hopeless state of mind and body we'll get deeper into that later but that's the first part we work these 11 steps and we have this change in our personality but nothing in life is free so we're being handed a bill we're Being Charged in the second part of the 12th step which is to tell people about our experience and to help them to have the same so i drew a diagonal line after the word steps and before the word we and we have we tried to carry this message to alcoholics that's part two of step 12 it is the charge it is what we are directed to do we don't have a choice it is not an option that's our job. That's the charge. And the third part of the 12th step is the greatest challenge of all, to practice these principles in all our affairs. So part one of step 12 is promise. Part two of step12 is charge. Part three of step twelve is uh challenge those are the three parts of the 12th step now um i think we could take that down um thanks andy um a couple of points to make um the 12-step originally in the first edition first printing did say having had a spiritual experience but as a result of all of the letters that came in and uh asking bill what am i doing wrong i'm i'm having i'm doing these steps and i'm a change in my personality but i don't have this white light experience that you and fitz had what am I missing so bill wrote the spiritual experience appendix where he explains the difference between the experience and awakening is just a question of time one happens suddenly one happens gradually and that's when he changed the word in the step to awakening in the second printing of the first edition which is april 1941 a little while after the first edition came out they changed it to awakening because it's a little bit more understandable and that's where we've kept it since then um actually over the years uh the term these steps and those steps uh were changed a few times um but the important thing to know is this you may want to write it down in a blank spot next to 12 steps somewhere that in 1976 at the World Convention it was decided that any change to the steps traditions and concepts and basically the first 164 pages, any changes to the first164 pages of this book you ready for this? This is what it requires to get that to change is 75% approval worldwide go to your business meeting your local business meeting and try and get 75 percent of the group to agree to the kind of creamer to buy for the coffee and see if you think that you can get 75 percent of worldwide groups to agree on a change in the book not going to happen so that's the obvious statement um we can go a little bit further um all right practice principles on all affairs um many of us exclaim what an order i can't go through with it um when i first heard that line back in 1983 the way that i read it because of the way I always look at things, was I read it like this. What? An order? I can't go through with it. Don't tell me what to do. My favorite song was Groucho Marx's song, Whatever It Is, I'm Against It, because that's the way i made my decisions. I listened to what your decision, your point of view was, and I took the opposite. Because what I wanted to do is get under your skin. I just wanted it to be irritating. But be that as it may, that's on my inventory. What an order, I can't go through with it. Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to please highlight these principles and write the steps. When we see those words, principles, they mean steps. We are not saints. please highlight the next two sentences actually until you end of the paragraph actually excuse me the point is that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines Please underline spiritual. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. Again, the steps we've set down are guides to progress and here's a statement that's been used to justify all kinds of unacceptable behaviors. The line says we claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection. please highlight and circle or underline the word spiritual twice. And the reason why I say it's been used to try and excuse all kinds of unacceptable behavior is because people have said and done things, and their rationalization is, well, it's progress, not perfection. God's not through with me yet, so it's okay to do this shitty thing I just did. No, it' s not. We're trying to grow along spiritual terms, and we won't have the time to get into this today but we will next week get into what that exactly means at this point in our recovery what does that mean what spiritual principles are we trying to live by and just as a little bit of a hint those of you who know that uh this is all based on the Oxford group. They had their activities to produce certain end results, and those certain end results can be viewed as spiritual goals, purity, honesty, unselfishness, and love. So if we approach things on the basis of is it going to produce those things or not, maybe it's easier to tell what god's will is for us we strive for spiritual progress so this thing i just did does it violate those principles of purity honesty unselfishness and love if it does then it's not spiritual progress i can't use that to excuse something i just didn't okay um so spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection um please underline our description of the alcoholic and above it write doctor's opinion chapters one two and three this is an answer to another question just like on the previous page people ask well when do i start working the steps and it's very clearly written there here's another one that gets missed as people ask me all the time where are the directions for the first two steps they're not there i don't see them anywhere the book starts in how it works with we are now at step three when i came into recovery in march of 1983 they handed me this book and they said turn to page chapter five and start reading and doing what it says and i got two pages in and i read i'm now at step three and i thought that's not bad i'm not in rehab one full day and i'm already at a third step and i don't know what that is but the instructions for the third step are contained uh for the instructions für how to work the first two steps in a sense are here because you don't work the First Two Steps. The First Two steps are conclusions that we come to as a result of the reading that we do up until this point and here's where Bill tells us that he says, our description to the alcoholic, the doctor's opinion in the first three chapters. The chapter to the agnostic, chapter four. And our personal adventures. And again, in the beginning, we were directed to read some of those. Before and after, please highlight, make clear three pertinent ideas. pertinent ideas means conclusions of the mind so he's saying if we read everything up to page 59 we're on page 60 here if we reading everything up until this point we should come to these conclusions they are a that we're alcoholic and cannot manage our own lives to the left of that right step one this is in reference to step one that we'RE ALCOHOLIC AND CANNOT MANAGE OUR OWN LIVES so to the LEFT OF IT PLEASE WRITE STEP ONE B THAT PROBABLY NO HUMAN POWER COULD EVER LEAVE OUR ALCOHOLISM AND TO THE LEFT TO THAT RIGHT PART OF STEP TWO that's part of step two and c that god could and would if he were sought is not step three it is the rest of step two so to the left of it writes part of step two so a is step one b is part of step two and c is the rest of step two now on the left side the left margin on this page next to what we just read i'm going to suggest you add something as well that we are alcoholic and cannot manage our own lives next to that right i can't i canít next to b i've written he can that probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism so i can't he can or she can whichever you want you prefer she can and c is not so i think i'll let him part c is so i better go find him let me read part c again it says that god could and would if he were sought it doesn't say if he chose to come around so a b and c is i can't he can i think i'll go find him because that's what we do on step three is we embark on a on a path to pursue and find that power and establish a relationship with him so bill is saying abc if you've read up to this point, and you've come to those conclusions, then you're ready. He said, being convinced we were at step three, and I'm going to leave it at that. Being convinced we're at step three. Highlight that, please, and underline we're At Step Three. And if you remember, last week we talked about this, that in the original writing, Bill had another statement after that. What he had originally written was if you are not convinced on these vital issues you ought to reread the book to this point or else throw it away i love that that's what bill's conclusion was originally that was removed obviously and this is where we're going to pick up next week we're gonna start at this point uh if you've got any questions just hang around for uh the coffee shop i thank you all for coming um we um have uh amanda to take us out yes did you have anything else you want to add no and hired won't be at the coffee show at the cafe shop right kathy's gonna be leading the coffee shop but even better you can go and hear him in 45 minutes speak in georgia you don't want anyone to show up at the coffee house of course but we'd be lost without your heritage all righty that's it okay amanda and andy if you could give amanda please uh pay there you go amanda is going start off with a vision for you and about halfway through everyone's gonna i'm gonna ask you all to unmute and join her and then we'll all join her in the lord's prayer amanda here you go i just unmuted you brilliant thank you a vision for you our book is meant to be suggestive only we realize we know only a little god will constantly disclose more to you and to us ask him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick the answers will come if your own house is in order but obviously you cannot transmit something you haven't got see to it that your relationship with him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the great fact for us. God bless you.