The Zoom Meeting as a Safe Place for Newcomers – Ralph W.

About This Speaker Tape

Big Book - 2020

A broken 33-year-old with no keys no license and a terrifying indifference toward his own daughter's absence Ralph W. hit a wall on October 11 1986. He describes the 'negative second step'—a desperate belief in the futility of his own life—that propelled him into recovery. Ralph focuses on the 'recipe' for survival: enlarging the spiritual life through self-sacrifice and working with others to weather the 'certain trials' of sobriety. He recounts a high-stakes moment seven years in standing in a hotel room with Disney executives and a bottle of Dom Perignon where the 'neon sign' of his recovery slogans finally overrode his crushing need for approval. Now 67 Ralph views sponsorship not as a dictatorship but as a conduit for grace moving from the wreckage of an $80,000 IRS bill to the simple profound joy of holding his grandson.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Ralph W. begins by reading from pages 14-15 of the Big Book regarding the necessity of working with others.
• 5:12 Ralph describes his 'bottom' in 1986: no ID, no license, and the scary moment he stopped caring that he couldn't see his daughter.
• 10:45 Discussion on the 'debris' of early sobriety, including an $80,000 IRS bill and gaps in his resume.
• 15:20 Ralph explains the 'why' of the spiritual experience versus the 'how-to' of the program.
• 20:15 Laughter: Ralph talks about the 'thumping phase' and quoting the Big Book to old-timers.
• 23:40 The Dom Perignon story: a trial in Palm Springs and the pressure to drink in front of Disney executives.
• 28:10 Ralph discusses the 'bondage of self' and the role of sponsorship as a conduit for grace.
• 33:50 Ralph reflects on the pandemic and the shift to Zoom meetings as a new way of connecting.
• 38:15 Ralph describes a recent surprise celebration with his five brothers and his grandson.