Arrogance as a Deficiency in Self-Esteem – Peggy M.

About This Speaker Tape

31st Annual International Women's Conference -

Peggy M. maps out the contradictions of her personality—the 'arrogant wimp' who is simultaneously a bully and a coward—and how sobriety has allowed her to reconcile these disparate parts. She traces her wreckage from a 25-year-old with cirrhosis and orange-spotted hair to a woman who finds spirituality in Baroque music football and feeding foxes in the Nebraska cold. Through the lens of the Big Book and the amends process she describes the shift from a life of 'agony and ecstasy' to one of quiet gratitude emphasizing that recovery is a privilege and a daily spiritual maintenance project rather than a right.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Peggy M. introduces herself and discusses her 'emotional girdle' and vulnerability with other women.
• 5:15 Laughter: Discussion of being an 'arrogant wimp' and the 'committee in the head'.
• 10:20 Peggy describes the 'bondage of self' and her morning practice of the Third Step Prayer.
• 14:45 Story about her mother driving her to Melwood Farm to get sober.
• 18:30 Analysis of arrogance as a deficiency in self-esteem.
• 23:10 Childhood story about 'Flash' and the complexities of the amends process.
• 28:40 Discussion of the 'duvenage' spiral staircase and the nature of spiritual change.
• 32:15 The 'pentamento' metaphor: removing the wreckage to find the original soul.
• 36:50 Story about a woman drinking Smirnoff on a rocky flight to Arkansas.
• 41:10 Laughter: The story of the bird crapping on her dress in San Jose.
• 46:20 Spiritual reflection on feeding foxes in Nebraska and the 'safety of the light'.