Why He Stopped Worrying About Whether People Like Him – Russell

About This Speaker Tape

January 25th, 1981. That is the date the clock started. Now in his 44th year, Russell S. speaks from a vantage point where most of his old timers are dead. He doesn't offer a soft hand; he offers the grit of repeated humiliations. He warns that doing a fourth or fifth step doesn't guarantee sobriety—he has seen plenty of people with decades of time drink themselves back into the wreckage. For Russell, the "rudimentary steps" like the eighth and ninth are just basics for living. The real divide, the line that separates the men from the boys, is the sixth and seventh.

He describes the "rocket ship ride into the fourth dimension" not as a fleeting happiness—which is just getting laid or buying a car—but as a permanent joy. He argues that most alcoholics are just "angry two-year-olds" who believe they are powerful because they can drive a car 80 miles per hour. True sobriety requires a Higher Power as the central factor, otherwise, you are just a sober crazy person.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Russell S. opens with his sobriety date: January 25, 1981.
• 2:15 Laughter: Discussion on the 'vantage point' of having 44 years of sobriety.
• 7:40 Russell argues that doing the 4th and 5th steps does not guarantee one won't drink again.
• 12:10 The 'Fourth Dimension of Existence' and the difference between happiness and joy.
• 16:50 Defining alcoholism as a mental disease of restlessness, irritability, and discontent.
• 22:10 Discussion on Step 1 and the paradox of feeling powerful when you own a car and a job.
• 28:40 The 'Brain' technique for dealing with manipulative newcomers.
• 32:15 Deep dive into Step 6 and Step 7 as the 'Higher Power steps' that separate men from boys.
• 38:20 Story about a marriage counselor and wanting to date other women.
• 41:10 Amends: Visiting his first wife in the hospital during her battle with cancer.
• 44:30 Russell's refusal to 'shut the door' on the past, choosing to remember his wreckage to stay humble.