Two Zombies and a Ride Around Town 😂 – Betty P.

About This Speaker Tape

19th Annual Crested Butte Mountain Conference - 2002

A childhood spent in the shadow of adoption and a Catholic school that didn't fit her Betty P. describes a life where alcohol was the only medicine for a deep-seated sense of worthlessness. From the telephone company switchboards of Santa Fe to the high-stakes world of corporate sales she navigated a functioning alcoholism that only collapsed after the death of her husband and a descent into a 'cold vomit-smelling life.' She speaks of the 'painful process of ego puncturing' required to move past the grandiose image of the successful professional and the hollow reality of the woman who crawled into her garage to hide from her children. Her recovery is marked by a shift from the 'infinity box' of isolation to a gritty honest connection with others eventually finding a peace that allows her to embrace her grandchildren and a late-in-life marriage based on sanity rather than compulsion.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Opening gratitude and mentions of the conference committee.
• 5:30 Childhood memories of adoption and the 'tremendous rage' felt after a playground game.
• 12:15 Early drinking days at the telephone company and the 'zombie' drink blackout.
• 22:40 The 'functioning' years: working as a supervisor and sales rep while drinking.
• 31:10 The loss of her husband and the subsequent descent into isolation and scotch.
• 42:20 Discussion of the Fourth Step and the necessity of a moral inventory to stop the 'insane lies.'
• 55:15 Laughter: Stories about the 'inner child' work and writing letters with the non-dominant hand.
• 1:10:00 Reflections on the 'contagious' nature of recovery within families.
• 1:25:30 Closing thoughts on the power of the Big Book and the fellowship.