Twelve Step Workshop – Part 5 of 6 – 2024 – Peter M.

About This Speaker Tape

Twelve Step workshop - 2024

Bloodstained soil pants and a boot with no front: Peter M. describes the wreckage of 1988 living in an abandoned building in Manhattan's Alphabet City panhandling for whiskey and Valium. After six failed treatment attempts and a suicide attempt in a Staten Island motel he found a path to illumination that didn't rely on his own broken machinery. He speaks candidly about the 'plaque on the soul' that accumulates even in long-term sobriety arguing that the steps aren't a one-time event but a recurring necessity to kill the ego. He details a specific spiritual crisis where his sponsor Mickey pushed him to make amends to the Catholic Church through confession breaking a long-held resentment. For Peter M. recovery is a process of subtraction—less of himself and more of his Higher Power—to avoid the 'bondage' of a mind that constantly tries to out-think the solution.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Peter M. introduces himself and mentions his home group in Fort Lauderdale.
• 5:45 Discussion on the difference between 'mechanics' of the Big Book and living the transformation.
• 11:20 The 'plaque on the soul' metaphor and the necessity of revisiting the steps.
• 18:30 Laughter: Discussion on the 'bondage' of the mind and the ego's distractions.
• 26:15 Detailed account of hitting bottom in Alphabet City, New York, in 1988.
• 34:40 The 'three-fold illness' and the danger of the alcoholic mind.
• 42:10 Story about selling his professional Ludwig drum kit for a fraction of its value to buy drinks.
• 51:00 The 'more'u2014the physical and mental obsession of the craving.
• 58:20 Account of his suicide attempt in a Staten Island motel.
• 1:05:15 Step 9: The process of making amends to the Catholic Church via confession.
• 1:15:40 Analysis of Step 1 and the need for a spiritual experience to conquer the illness.
• 1:22:10 Closing thoughts on Higher Power's mercy and the 'four-letter word' of the mind. Applause.