The Twelve Steps of AA (4.5 Hrs) – Part 3 of 4 – 2017 – Sandy B.

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The Twelve Steps of AA (4.5 hrs) - 2017

A garden hose vein pumping in the forehead is the physical mark of the mind-reader a trait Sandy B. identifies as a core defect. He dissects the brutal machinery of the Fourth Step moving from the resentment of his children's illness to the crushing guilt of being loaded the night his father died. He doesn't believe in the 'pay the price' philosophy of Southern California sobriety arguing that the mental twist of alcoholism makes the cost unpredictable. The narrative shifts from the wreckage of infidelity and a childhood accident involving a rotary phone to the slow gritty process of Steps 6 and 7. He describes a spiritual experience not as a burning bush but as the quiet realization that he could stop smoking and stop being a 'bad guy imitation.' He concludes with the absurdity of his time as a drunk limo driver nearly crashing into Barbara S.'s house while high on Quaaludes.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Sandy B. opens with an exercise on resentments against his children and the 'mind-reader' defect.
• 2:15 Discussion of the grudge held against himself for 15 years regarding his father's death.
• 5:40 Critique of the 'pay the price' mentality in Southern California sobriety.
• 8:20 Detailed breakdown of the Fourth Step process: the three columns and the list of defects.
• 12:10 Analysis of fear as a future-oriented state and the paradox of having faith while being frightened.
• 16:45 Laughter: The three tips for listening to annoying shares at meetings.
• 21:30 The 'sexual inventory' and the wreckage of infidelity and dishonesty.
• 26:10 The 'odious spiritual disease' and the process of reading the Fifth Step to a sponsor.
• 31:00 A story about Ruby and the contrast between strict parenting and Ruby's 'eat crap' approach.
• 35:20 Raw and Emotional: Admitting the childhood accident where his son almost lost an eye.
• 42:15 Discussion of Steps 6 and 7 and the prayer for removing fears (e.g., fear of animals).
• 50:10 The limo driver story involving Steven S., Quincy J., and Quaaludes.