The Real Alcoholic and the Phenomenon of Craving – Big Book – Step Study – Part 1 of 2 – Local AA Speakers

caught up hey melissa i'm gonna take you off too i'm going to be i want to have all ladies with me today i'll just call on some peeps um hold on a second so we're gonna go through one right guys i i'll i'll do some stuff here why are we why are мы doing what is alcoholic synonyms a lot of people have been around a long time like myself my sobriety date is may 7th 1996 i've been doing the big book way for about five or six years before that i never really read it at all, had no idea what alcoholism was, no idea what a real alcoholic was, no idea with the phenomenon of craving was no idea that I was different than other people, that they were alcoholics, hard drinkers, moderate drinkers. Where is my friend Kate? Kate, can you take yourself off of mute also? All right, cool. Let's see. So, uh, you know, then I come, Oh, William, take yourself up mute. I'm just going to call some stuff out when we need some stuff. William, I'm going to need you to sidekick with me, and we're going to go quick. So doctor's opinion, right? We're trying to get recovered, but the main reason for step one is to find out if you are a real alcoholic or not. Alcoholics Anonymous is for real alcoholics. It is not for everyone, okay? They tried to weed the people out back in the day. Now they opened it up and all you need to do is have, you know, some type of limbs and you can come to AA and do anything that you want, right? It's not what it was originally meant to be. We're trying to find out if we're a real alcoholic. If we are a real alcoholic, we are so different than other people and it's going to tell us that. But the greatest news in the whole world is if you are a Real Alcoholic, there is a solution for you. one solution in this book, okay? And they give you precise directions on how to do it. They did it quickly, all right? They got you recovered and then they had you work. And that's what we do here. We don't do BYOC through the book. We do the big book. So that's what we're going to do today. So if we turn to the doctor's opinion, remember we had you guys go through the thing here on doctor's opinion. Our goal is for you to be helping people go through of the steps right away that's our goal for you to get recovered if you renew if you're old in the rooms and haven't done this to learn it and then show other people that's the goal right so we're going to what page we're on the doctor's opinion which is xxv okay um so it says we have alcoholics and this is a plan of recovery it's described in this book i'm going to go whip through this this chapter here right um it's written by a well-known doctor he specializes in alcohol and drug addiction and he says it again in the next paragraph i specialize in alcoholism right and he's describing an alcoholic of a type what type melissa real alcoholic every time he says certain words he's talking about the real alcoholic okay that's what we're trying to find out if we are or not can you stay in aa if you're not a real alcoholic finny absolutely can you be the group chairperson in a year yes and you lead meetings yes can you chair meetings yes even if you're a real alcoholic you can do anything in aa you can tell people not to believe in god you could tell them god's not important they let you do anything and it's become very open William, what's that thing that it's very much like? Smart recovery. Smart recovery, anybody wants to chant later look up smart recovery and see how much it resembles the fellowship of AA, it's different than Alcoholics Anonymous and then it says down at the bottom we must present this conceptions to other alcoholics, that's what we're doing then it said this man and 100 others appear to have recovered it only says recovered in this book. It says it on our first page. If you don't like the word recovered, and I didn't like it because I didn' t like it, it's ignorance. It's all they talk about in here. You may have grown up in AA where they're recovering, okay? And that's all they talk about, and they yell at people that say recovered. It' s bad information. If you don't like recovered, you're going to have trouble going through this book with us or with anybody because it says recovered, recovered, recovered, recovered, recovered, recovered, recovered, recovered, right? I personally know scores with the type. What's the type, Kate? Copeless. Copeless, yes. Real alcoholics, right? With other methods failed completely. We're turning to the second page. The doctor says you may rely absolutely on anything they say about themselves. These were the – they were locked up, these people. They were in sanitariums. They were having lobotomies. They were they were the scum of society. And now he's saying you can rely on anything they have to say. Right. The body, the alcoholic is quite as different as his mind and they're both abnormal. So us alcoholics, if you're a real alcoholic, your mind is shot and your body has this unique allergy. Right? They're going to talk about it. It says allergy in the next paragraph. Problem drinkers, which is a real alcoholic. We work out our solution on a spiritual as well as altruistic plane. I'm on the top of XXVII, right? The subject presented in this book, that's where the solution is, right. It's not in meetings where we talk about ourselves and our day and our problems. It's Not If You're a Real Alcoholic. And then it says about three quarters of the way down, practical application when, William? At once. At once! we're not waiting 90 days we're dealing with that wherever that came from I've asked Daniel down in Florida they don't say there's no 90 days in the books in Florida either it's just not there friends they believe in themselves down at the bottom and still more in the capital P we're talking about God the answer is going to be a relationship with a God a higher power of your choosing to avoid death next page that the action of alcohol on these chronic alcoholics janine was a chronic alcoholic a real alcoholic alcoholic is a manifestation of an allergy we have an allergy which makes us different and unique that the phenomenon of craving and here this is very important is limited to this class which class finney real alcoholic and never occurs in the average temperate drinker, which are probably the majority of people in AA. Guys, we love AA. We love the fellowship of AA. We're not downplaying it. We are just letting you know that over the last 80 years, AA telephone tag has been played and this message that you are going to hear today, you may have never heard it before because they don't talk about it in the rooms anymore or many rooms. These allergic types, what's that Melissa? Ill alcoholic. They can never safely use alcohol in any form. They have to give up their reliance upon humans. You've been told for years, sponsor, sponsor. Sponsor, sponsor sponsor. Sex problems and sponsor. Going to a wedding? Sponsored. New job? Sponsered. Here it says human beings can't help you if you're a real alcoholic. Right? Alcoholics must. We must have depth and weight in our solution. We need to be grounded in a power greater than ourselves. William, please read the paragraph at the bottom of that page. Men and women, you love this part. Men and woman drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. Sensation is so elusive that while they admit it's injurious, they cannot at a time differentiate the true from the false. Then their alcoholic life seems like the only normal one. They're restless, irritable, discontent. So another word for bored, angry, depressed. unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort that comes at once by taking a few drinks they see drink they drink they see others taking with impunity so again we believe the delusion that we can drink like other people after they succumb to the desire again as many do the phenomenon of craving develops right and it's only limited to this class they pass through the well-known stages of esprit emerging remorseful with a firm resolution not to drink again this is repeated over and over unless the person can again experience sorry uh unless they unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope for his recovery okay so so guys let's make this simple so we could get out of this doctor's opinion right for time purposes we are real alcoholics if we are we have an allergy right and our allergic reaction to that allergy is the phenomenon of craving if you're allergic to strawberries and eat strawberries you break out in hives if you were a real alcoholic and you put alcohol in your system you breakout in the phenomenon or craving which means you can't stop not everyone in AA has that. It's a unique, small group of people. That's who this book was written for. OK, we're going to go through a lot of stuff with that. And literally, that's all it says on the next couple of pages. Right. You're going suddenly be able to avoid liquor. It says that that's one good thing. Suddenly going to be able control your desire for alcohol if you do what this book says, not what we say, what this book said. And it's not going to human power. Right. The next bunch of pages, if you read this as phenomenon of craving, phenomenon of craving, phenomena on a craving doomed, die, death, insanity. OK, everybody got it. He accepted the plan outline in this book and the doctor urges everybody to read this book. Right. Again, I'm telling you, I was in a sober look, sober for 18 years and never really picked this book up. couple of meetings you know where you read 12 pages and all of us with add can't pay attention we have no idea what they're talking about right let's skip bill story turn to page 17 there is many solutions it's called right janine in connecticut is that what it says no it says there is a solution a so that's like seven it's like one one solution dudes if you're a real alcoholic one solution right my thing that i brought up the other day and william and i were talking about it you if you go into a meeting today and there's in-person meetings and you're an newcomer and there'S 40 people there and seven people come to approach you i'm telling you you're going to get at least five to six different sets of directions from them they're going to tell you don't drink go to meetings they're going to say a word talk about your problems they're gonna tell you to read the 12 and 12 they're gotta tell you you're on steps 1 & 3 they're good so you don' have to do anything for a year you're gonna hear so many different things but this book tells you and Janine just pointed it out there is one solution hold on a second we all go we have alcoholics know thousands men and women who are once hopeless as bill nearly all have recovered write the word down learn the word love the word it's alcoholics anonymous they have solved the drink problem when you're done and they open up the rooms again in 2026 go in the rooms and say hey everybody i've solved the drinking problem see if they don't throw stuff at you they will i promise you Melissa's been there. They throw stuff at me. We are people who would mix, and then it says half three-quarters of the way down on the page. The feeling of the fellowship, of having shared in our problems is a beautiful thing. It says it is one element in the powerful cement which binds us, but in itself would always know. It says never have bound us as we are now joined. So that suffering, that identification, that fellowship stuff where we are all common people that have suffered won't hold you together if you are a what, Kate? Real alcoholic. You're a real alcoholic. It's not going to work. It may work for a little while. It may look for 10 years. It may walk for 15. It may wait for eight days. But it says it's not doing to do it. But it says right here, and we make you look for facts. Here's one of the facts. Finny, read this paragraph. The tremendous fact for every one of us is that we have discovered a common solution. How many? One. And who's this for? Which people? The real alcoholics. No, I get that. But the tremendous fact, for whom? Every one of them. So that means like every one OFUS on here, right? There's 50. Wow. There's 57 people at 5 o'clock on a Sunday night in the summer. Let's go. Let's go. Holy cow, there was just 30. I think a bus showed up. Hold on a second. So all 57 of us, it says, for every one of us. Go ahead, Vinny. Yes, for every one of us, there's a common solution. We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. This is the great news this book care to those who suffer from alcoholism okay so my question is right does everybody in aa agree no way so it says that we could join the broadly harmonious action everybody told you they throw stuff so that's not the case going on right now there's great news but we have great news to those who suffer from alcoholism so does everybody in the room suffer from alcohol no way okay um next page we have an illness it represents resentment financial insecurity look at the second little paragraph we hope this book this volume will inform and comfort you used to get comfort from the drink we hope this book will take its place. William, are there ex-problem drinkers in italics in this book? Yes. What does it say? For the ex-problem drinker who has found this solution, who is properly armed with facts about himself, can generally win the entire confidence of another alcoholic in a few hours until an understanding is reached to little or nothing can be accomplished. So guys, they called us, they said our problem has been solved already and now they're calling us x problem drinkers on your second visit to your second meeting when you get back walk in and say hi everybody i'm an ex-problem drinker see what happens wear a helmet wear a football helmet if you're going to talk what it says in the book hi everybody I'm an x problem I've been on zoom for five months I'm now a problem drinker. See what happens I see Susan she's laughing down there making me laugh uh we have the real answer we're properly armed with the facts as William said on the top of 19 it says after such an approach many take up their beds and walk again it's literally a bible quote all right i'm just going to say this to you because the book's going to say it to in a little while the fact of this is right our book says in in uh came to believe rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path so they're talking about the path of the first 100 people okay their path obviously if this book was written in 1939 and they started doing this in 1935 from 35 to 39 they couldn't have been reading this book it's impossible right william right what were they reading william please tell me uh the books they found absolutely essential were sermon on the mount matthew 5 6 7 book of james and first Corinthians 13. That's what they were reading, dudes. Okay? You're entitled to your own opinions. You're just not entitled to your own facts. It's literally from Dr. Bob and the good old timers. And it says, the elimination of our drinking is just a beginning. So not drinking is not what our goal is here. Okay. It says down at the bottom, useful program. We've written a book which we know is going to be controversial. We hope it's not going to be controversial i think it's a little bait and switch because we found out how controversial this book is right uh the top of 20 our very lives as x problem drinkers again wow they said it again what does it depend on not drinking it says no it depends on our constant thought of others and how we help may help meet their needs so i don't know about you guys but most of my day today I knew I had to do this and I was thinking about helping others today right I watched a little bit of Ozark I love that show right I got through one season yesterday I'm an alcoholic dudes one season of Ozarks today uh and my couch did not fly up it says here doubtless you are curious to discover how and why in the face of expert opinion well They were talking about other experts, but now the experts are in the rooms of AA. We have recovered from a hopeless condition of mind and body. Finney, why does it keep saying recovered? Because we're recovered. What do I have to do? Next paragraph. It's the purpose of this book to answer this question specifically. And then if you only have a few minutes, and again, we've got to speed through this whole thing, but look at the bottom of 20. If you really need to speak to somebody quickly. Moderate drinkers have little trouble giving up liquor entirely if they have good reason for it. They can take it or leave it alone. Can anybody take it, or leave her alone on this page? Hands up if you can. I didn't think so. If you're here at five o'clock on Sunday in the summer, then we have a certain type of hard drinker. He may have had to have it barely enough to gradually impair his health mentally. It can cause him to die, but this is important. If for good reason, ill health, falling in love, change of environment, warning of a doctor has anybody been able to stop now the answer is forever have you been able stopped for good because of these things anybody I don't see any hands up so kindly again I can't tell you William can't Tell You Melissa can't tell you it doesn't sound like you guys are moderate drinkers or heavy drinkers but it says the real alcoholic could have been a hard drinker could have been a moderate drinker but they've lost control look at it says control control control dr jekyll mr hyde right they're selfish dishonest they they build up everyone's lives around it and pull it down i'm on 22 now um down in the last paragraph opinions vary considerably is why the alcoholic reacts differently from normal people you aren't normal it's okay embrace it you're not normal anybody have a problem not being normal i don't have i'm gonna put a little thumbs up i like nothing normal okay and it says it again on the last page in the last sentence both in the body and mental state which makes it virtually impossible for him to stop right and then it says there on the top of 23 first paragraph therefore the main problem william so that's like the important problem right the main problem of the alcoholic what type of alcoholic to name the real alcoholic centers in his mind rather than his body so we we are unique people that have a body and mind problem but now they're really telling us that it's really our mind that's screwed okay because we're going to take it out of our body and most of you i'm sure have taken it out of your body for a certain period of time but our minds are so whacked out that we always went back right that obsession that that's that's what makes us the real alcoholic i love the beginning of the next one once in a while he may tell the truth which means all the other times what's he doing william lion the tragic truth bottom of the page is that if the man be a real alcoholic how many times are you going to bring this up melissa he has lost control lost control melissa read the italics this is the second fact we have you look for the fact is that most alcoholics for reasons yet obscure have lost the power of choice and drink our so-called willpower becomes practically non-existent we are unable at certain times to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago we are without defense against the first drink beautiful in the bottom of the page it says if we don't do the stuff we're supposed to do we're going to die or go permanently insane two choices i'm not really up for diane from montreal right that's not two choices I'm looking for right then the next page starts up at the top there is a solution. What's that say, Kate? I don't see where it says there's a solution. Top of 25. Oh, we went back up. Almost none of us like the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings, which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it works. That's good. So it says there is a solution one solution and even back in 1939 they knew that nobody wanted to do the steps right it says right there nobody wants to do steps even in 1939 so it says when we were approached by those with the problem have been solved there's nothing left for us to pick up the spiritual kits laid at their feet here's your space travel we have found much of heaven and then rocketed into the fourth dimension of existence they earlier in bill's story says catapulted into the court dimension however the hell you get into the forth dimension it's all good with us just get there right so then they say the two facts you want to read those really quick janine the great fact is just this and nothing less that we have had a deep have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows, and toward God's universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves. Thank you. Everything that's capitalized this whole book guys is about having a relationship with God right? He, creator, God. This is the facts of this book right? Again we're not here to push God. We're just reading, guys, right? They're going to say some beautiful stuff about God all through this book. And every time you turn a page, they're going to say, no humans, no human, no human, I'm sorry, I won't skip. No human, no human. God, God, God, no human. All right, we're done. See you tomorrow. No humans, all God. But it says here at the bottom, there's no return from human aid. You have how many choices william two first choice go on to the bitter end blotting out the consciousness of your tolerable situations as best you could which you guys have been trying to do anybody want that choice hands up i don't see anybody and the other to accept spiritual help i'm going spiritual help i'm going to thumbs up two hands up and a flip flop i'm in spiritual help right let's turn this 26 mental he above all wants to regain self-control i have never seen one case recover i'm on 27 here and there once in a while a miracle happens guys miracles are happening every day i'm looking at kate i'm looking at melissa i'm look at finney and jay i'm looking at so many people that are miracles in the last handful of months it's crazy lily might be the biggest miracle i was quite nervous about her she's smiling again beautiful beautiful stuff lily and dave holy cow guys you're all here i'm just saying they used to happen every blue moon is what this doctor saying and now they're happening all day every day trini wow i couldn't be on last night i heard he brought the house down um so in this case it says that a spiritual experience is necessary page 28 we tell people to look what it says about religion now i'm going to say this out loud at the beginning of our book william what does it say are we a religious organization or not we're not a religious organisation but I know only a couple of books I've ever read which speak about religion more and more favorably than the big book, right? It's beautiful. But we're not a religious organization. A little bit of a bait-and-switch here. Down at the bottom of the page, Melissa, do all of us, all of the first 100 join religious bodies? Not all of Us join religious Bodies, but most of Us favor such memberships. If you say that William, Kate, Melissa, and myself told you to join religious bodies, we're going to deny it. But the book here says most of them did. Most of the recovered alcoholics joined religious denominations. And it says on page 131 that your families should join religious denominational. Now, we are not telling you to do it. We are just telling you what the book says. And then on page 29, clear-cut directions are given showing how we stay recovering for 25 years. Is that what it says, Vinny? Clear-cut direction are given show how we recovered. I thought it was recovering forever. We'll always be recovering. Daniel, tell me what page I should turn to where it says we'll always recovering, that the drink is an arm length away. it's not there right all right i'm sorry i was going to find it for everybody and read it but it's a a gibberish and then it says how we always tell people in directions how we should tell our stories right did i miss anybody here janine read this janine each individual each individual in the personal stories describes in his own language and from his own point of view the way he established his relationship with god guys that's what we're supposed to be talking about the solution and how we establish a relationship with God that's What all the stories did now I'm gonna let you know that humans over the years are taking out some of those stories and putting in some human stories right some of Those beautiful God stories from the first few editions are slowly getting pulled out right so be careful on that um relationship with god okay we're going to do questions later so now we're moving on to more about alcoholism william what is this first page consumed with control and real alcoholic nobody it says nobody wants to be a real alcoholic first sentence and how do we try not to be alcoholic by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people we want to control enjoy our drinking all right it is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker melissa what's an abnormal drinkers the persistence of this illusion is astonishing many pursued into the gates of insanity and death and they are going to show us an example of insanity in death in here right uh that we're alcoholics the delusion were like other has to be smashed we alcoholics we real alcoholics and men and women have lost their ability to control our drinking we know that no real alcoholic that's all it says ever regains control right but since you oh this is so good guys look at this it says all of us felt at times we were regaining control hold on a second thumbs up if anybody thought they were gaining control flip-flops feet toes elbows right but it says such intervals usually brief we're inevitably followed by still less control guys alcoholics of our kind last words on the that page we have tried every uh imaginable uh remedy on top of 31 and here we go he says the same thing again in some instances there has been brief recovery followed by always a still worse relapse how's that he repeats himself despite all we could say many who are real alcoholics is anybody you probably read this a thousand times you never knew it said real alcoholics so many times because you were thinking about what you were going to share i know you worked with this what i did right you already knew what you Were Going To Share When You Woke Up In the morning you didn't even get to the meeting yet right okay today's topic is people places and things but yeah i'm gonna i'm going to go off topic is that all right i'm not talking about my sister-in-law or my weed whacker or my there's a lot of cats in aa man i'm just saying lots of cats um heaven knows we've tried to drink like other people take a trip not take a tip don't drink at work don't drink hard stuff we try everything to gain control william what do they advise. Now, again, I'm just going to tell you that AA and Alcoholics Anonymous literally have so little in common present day in most of the rooms of the fellowship. William, if you're not buying into what we say, what do they tell us to do in the bottom of the last paragraph? Just step over to the nearest bar room and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink can stop abruptly try it more than once so anybody here stay until the miracle happens that's not what they tell us here they tell you this is the solution this is what you have to do if you're a real alcoholic and if you don't like it you're not ready go drink dude and then they tell you how to drink they give you directions for drinking they don't tell you come tonight means nine day we'll hold your hand bring all your problems here if your ass falls off put it in a bag take it to a meeting they say drink mofo drink go drink drink drink does everybody hear the difference between aa and alcoholics anonymous right go drink um once you started no control regulate down at the bottom of the page look they talk about the guy on the top of 33 he tried every attempt they all failed he was dead within four years so they talked about death they said they were going to um because they talk about females how they become the real thing real quick i'm on 34 halfway down the page if he is a real alcoholic there's very chance of his success one of my favorite lines in the book halfway down we think few to whom this book will appeal can stay anything dry like a year melissa who does this book the real alcohol that's why everybody in the room doesn't like when we read from the book or when we share from the it says here it's only going to appeal to a few the real alcoholic if anybody thinks they can stop on a non-spiritual basis give it a shot right williams got my new favorite line on zoom there's a little red box up top it says leave now we hope you don't leave but leave anytime you want because we're just reading the book right um maybe one of the most important characters in the book on page 35 you get introduced to jim jim finds out about alcoholics he a real admits he's a real alcoholic but he He won't enlarge his spiritual life. And Bill warned us on page 14 that he's going to get drunk, and he gets drunk. But probably the most important part of this guy is he speaks about I, me, my. Look at 36. We had you look at that. A lady told me this, and it pissed the crap out of me for a long time, a couple of days ago. she said if you are talking in meetings about yourself all the time i mean my listen to people how they share i mean by i mean why i mean mine look what it does here i mean i i mean and jim gets ripped on whiskey and milk okay i'm gonna go quick to 40 right and then we'll go to the insanity we get introduced to fred also look how many times on page 40 and 41 fred says i me and my as he's sharing 70 some odd times he gets completely bombed for days on edge on end he can't stop drinking okay the only other time that it is in this book is in bill's story in the first 10 pages, Bill's drinking the whole time he's talking about himself. He often speaks of insanity and a suicide. Okay? The rest of the book is we, our, and us. So I can't tell you that you'll be able to do it tomorrow. And sometimes we have to mention I when we chat or me in our telling our story, but we shouldn't be telling our stories so much. It's not necessary. Talk about the solution talk about how you found god quote from the book right let's go back to page 37 the insanity page janine what is the second step read how does it read i came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity so janine do i have a question for you power is capitalized right yes yeah they're talking about god there guys not not the people in the rooms as you might have heard but my question to you janine is from do people that are not insane need to be restored to sanity no only insane people if you're a real alcoholic we're insane guys who's insane hold on i'm getting both flip-flops Both of them. Who's insane here, dudes? Thumbs up? Right? Only insane need to be restored to sanity. So all it says on this page is insanity, curious mental phenomenon, insanely trivial excuse, insane idea, insanely insufficient. and then they talk about the jaywalker who is a beautiful insane model walking through cars for a thrill and gets hit breaks every bone of the body right that's us on the next page 38 it says if you were normal and then it says crazy and then this is insane again right that so we are if we are a real alcoholic go in to the room like I said what every year they let you back in or you feel comfortable this disease is over and say my drink problem has been solved I've recovered and I'm glad to be back here with you insane people see how that goes over but that's what our book says that's That's what Alcoholics Anonymous literally reads, right? So we literally just finished the first step, right. It says on the last page, we need divine help. It's a spiritual approach. And then the last paragraph it says it's alcoholic at certain times has no effective mental defense against the first drink except in a few rare cases. Hold on. christine finney there's some rare maybe you're one of the rare ones right russell always says that i love it maybe you'RE ONE OF THE RARE ONES except in a few rare cases neither he nor any other sponsor diner mate softball sober softball team player sober dancer no other human can provide such a defense Kate David where must the defense come from power greater than ourselves must come from power greater than ourselves it says the last line of the thing his defense must come from a higher power capitalize has to come from God William, why don't you be the second step guy and ask the ladies. We just did step one again. We'll take questions later on. You'll probably paraphrase better than I will. You want me to? Yeah. All right, dudes. What time was it? 20 minutes. We're going to pull this sucker off in an hour, guys. You're the man for that. We just didn't do step one, right? Step two, right, came to believe. This is step two. I love what it starts out, guys. Look at this. In the preceding chapters, you have learned something about real alcoholism. We hope we have made clear the distinction between the real alcoholic and the non-alcoholic. So think about this. We're on page 44 plus the beginning of the book. So 50-something, 60-some odd pages are devoted to find out if you're a real alcoholic or not. That's all there. That's what I told you at the beginning. But that's what the book is telling us, right? and it says if you when you honestly want to you can't stop drinking or when you're drinking you can't start blah blah blah you need a spiritual experience to conquer it right how many choices do they give us here william to be doomed in alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis what would you like guys spiritual basis i'm choosing anybody choosing to be doom to alcoholic death it's one of the choices no i see a thumbs down and some laughs i love it but that's what our book says. Hope it against hope, we weren't real alcoholics. Guys, the name of this chapter is called We Agnostics. Alcoholics Anonymous, again, this is not my opinion, I'm going by what we read here, is not for atheists and alcoholics, I mean atheists in agnostics, this chapter is to really provide information that really no one is an atheist or an agnostic. And Bill explains that. Now, it says down here at the bottom, don't be discouraged if you think you are one, because it says, perhaps it's going to be that way with you, but cheer up something like half of the first 100 thought we were atheists or agnostics. Our experience shows that you need not be discouraged. So even if you Think you're an atheist right now, and you're a little mad at me for saying that it's not for atheists or agnostics. I don't care. I'm just going to read to you, right? I love you, right? It says you need not be disconcerted. This will work for you too if you do what it says, right? If it says if a mere code of morals is a better philosophy, many of us would have recovered a while ago. Lack of power. I'm on 45. That's our dilemma. We had to find a power greater than ourselves in order to live. How do we do that? Well, that's what this book is about. Main object. Hold on a second. Janine, what's the main object of this book? I'm in the middle of 45. That's exactly what it's about. It's to enable you to find a power greater than yourself which will solve your problem. So the main objective of Alcoholics Anonymous, right, that is our program. That's the name of this books. That's name of our fellowship. the main objective of Alcoholics Anonymous is to stop drinking William no it's enabling you to find a power greater than yourself that's the main did everybody see that so I'm not making that up Debbie's shaking her head I got Canada on my side while on the book side so it says we've written a book which is spiritual as well as moral and it means of course that we're going to wait a year to talk to the beginner about God. Did you say that? What's it say, Melissa? And it means of course that we're going to talk about God Of course we're gonna talk We're going to talk about God Remember, there's a leave button Please don't leave but there is a leave button The book says of course we're gonna talk about God What does AA say? they've yelled at me don't talk about god in the newcomer meeting you're going to scare him off i think it's the old crusty alcoholic that don't want to hear about god because most of the beginners i'm in touch with love god love hearing about some type of solution his face drops when we speak of spiritual matters right we have shared so this whole thing is going to talk about prejudice prejudice prejudice is not what it is today right where we're talking about different races. It's about prejudging, right? I have prejudice. I block out thoughts about the truth, okay? So it says here, prejudice. It says that down at the bottom of this page. We have shared as honest doubt and prejudice. Some of us have been violently anti-religion. Religious, think about that. I've been violent when they talk about religion. To others, the word god brought up a particular idea of him which someone had tried to impress on them since i'm a kid and i blocked it out because i'm damn good at blocking shit out right we were bothered on the bottom of the page another word for prejudice we turn to page 46 skepticism another word for prejudice but then they're going to talk about our dude supreme being supreme being they are not talking about a pizza hut pizza right they're talking about the big guy double time in a couple of sentences everybody see that supreme being supreme being next paragraph we found that as soon as we were able to lay aside prejudice right and express even a willingness to believe in a power in ourselves we commence to get result even though it's impossible was fully define and comprehend the power which is god does everybody see capital p which is god they literally define it for you right anybody bothers you about the second step being something silly other than god let them know the power which is God right our own conception of God you pick your own God we don't pick it for you okay your own conception of god it says right here look him god we this is what we have people do in this paragraph all the way in this chapter highlight all the times god is mentioned look on this page supreme being god power him creative intelligent spirit of the universe all we have to do to get this is take simple steps the steps we found that god does not make too hard terms with those who speak seek him look at this other one another way to say it realm of spirit anything that's capitalized guys they're talking about god next page god god prejudice relation with god willing now they say believe so many times what's our steps say janine you read it again came to what? Believe. Look how many times it says believe in the second paragraph. Do I now believe? So look at this. Even if you don't believe yet, Rhonda from New York, right? Even if You Don't Believe Yet, Ann S., it says you don' t have to. It says am I now willing to believe? Do I believe or am I even willing to belive in the power within myself? If you are, you can be down with us with this book, with this program. We assure you emphatically you're on your way. Look at the next paragraph. Believe, believe, believe faith turn the page up at the top of 48. We're handicapped by our prejudice. Look at these words. Obscenity sensitiveness regular prejudice Finney? Unreasoning prejudice Anti Anti, right, violently anti-religious, unreasoning prejudice. And see what these words say in this book? It says right here, this sort of thinking had to be abandoned. If you want to get what this program has, abandon your thoughts about your prejudice. Look, it says at the bottom of that paragraph, we hope no one else. So they're not saying they weren't prejudiced, right? They said half of them thought they were agnostic or atheists. It says, we hope no one else will be prejudiced as long as some of us were. Guys, the facts, I do it by survey, most of AAA is prejudiced. And they have the numbers, so prejudice often wins in the rooms and fellowship of AA. It's pretty scary if you're a real alcoholic and you go there these days. We have work to do, guys. We have a lot of work to doing. This isn't, we're not here so that we feel better, which I thought was for the first 18 years or so of my sobriety. Look at the next paragraph, facts and facts. Next paragraph, proof and proof. You need to show me if you want me to believe something because I'm a super, my life sucks. I've run it into the toilet, right? But you still need to Show Me in order for me to get off my high horse. High horse, my wife's crap, yet I'm still on a high horse, imagine that. Anybody identify with that a little bit? You're still going to need to show me proof, right? Well, the proof is look at the next page, 49. The all-powerful guiding creative intelligence. Five words in a row, God, God. God, god, god. Beautiful. And if you don't believe in God, it says that you're going to believe in nothing, nowhere, and nothingness. Right? It says here creation. We agnostics and atheists chose to believe, here we go guys, this is where it really starts to show there aren't really many atheists. It says creation, we agnosticos and atheistic came to believe that our human intelligence was the last word, the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end. I love this line, rather than the end of us. So we think we know everything. And we're going to often tell you that we know everything as we're running people's lives or trying to and then ruining their lives, right? William, do they ask us kindly or did they mention that we should lose prejudice against religion? No, I think they're almost on their knees begging us. What does it say? We who have traveled this dubious path beg of you to lay aside prejudice even against organized religion. People of faith have an idea what life is about. Uh-oh, hold on, look at this thing. This might include a few of you on here. How many? 54 people on here? It says, dissecting spiritual beliefs practiced when we might have observed that many spiritual-minded persons of all races, colors, and creeds, so pretty much everybody, were demonstrating a degree of stability and happiness and usefulness which we should have sought ourselves. um janine next page on 50 what does it say about our personal stories first paragraph down in our personal story is you will find a wide variation in the way each teller approaches and conceives of the power which is greater than himself guys that's exactly what it said on page 29, right? Our stories are supposed to be about how we found and have a relationship with God. Right? The next paragraph down believes power graded himself. The power has done the miraculous, the humanly impossible. Power, power, power. Simple requirements at the bottom of the page or the steps um on the top of 51 leaving aside the drink question because this isn't about the drink the drink is just but a symptom right it says when many hundreds of people are able to say or when 57 53 of us whatever it is are ableto say that god the presence of god is the most important powerful reason why in their life right now we should have some faith We asked ourselves all the way down. We asked yourselves, are not just some of us just as biased and unreasonable? In other words, for what, Finny? Prejudice. About the realm of spirit, right? We still need to see facts. That's why nobody believed that the Wright brothers flew. Reporters wouldn't do it. They needed to see proof because they knew man couldn't fly. Think about that same prejudice, right. They wouldn't report it. It was their job to report the news, and they wouldn't do it. So we're on page 52, and here's our bedevilments. Let me know if anybody identifies with some of these things. If we were having trouble with personal relationships, anybody? We couldn't control our emotional natures. Anybody outburst every once in a while? We were a prey to misery and depression. Anybody lay on the couch a little too much? Watch Ozark. We couldn'T make a living. Anybody ever lose jobs? We had a feeling of uselessness. Anybody sit there going, oh me, oh my, right? We were full of fear. Anybody have any fear? Money, fear, life fear, relationship fear. We were filled with fear and we were unhappy. Anybody feel unhappy sometimes? We couldn't seem to be a real help to other people. This is before you come. They're talking about us before we get the spirit, right. We need more spirit. Now, I identify with a bunch of those things not the way I used to at all, right? But we're going to be crazy forever, right, even when they take away the drink. The realm of the spirit, spirit of the universe, God idea one, here we go. We had done about the bottom of the page. We agnostic in the answer. We're sticking to the idea that self-sufficiency would solve our problems. Right? Self-sufficiency is our God. Right, Melissa? They're going to show us that with the word reason. Middle of 53. Melissa, will you read that when we became alcoholics? When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis. Hold on. Who did it? Me. Who did it? Me. We did it, it says. Go ahead. we could not postpone or evade we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else he is nothing alright stop who's choosing everything hands up who's chosen nothing you know what you guys hands went down fast good job what else Melissa what's the other question God either is or he isn't I'm going with is two hands up anybody is it so I want to I'm good thing because if you say is it we have it rigged that you automatically get kicked off the screen so good right now it's talking about here we couldn't duck the issue next paragraph right some of us had already walked far over the bridge of reason are those words words capitalize, Janine? They are. So the bridge of reason is our what? God. God, right? The outlines and the promise of the new land. We're trying to get to God, but we can't get there. Look, it says we were grateful that reason capitalized. Look at that. Reason is our higher power. We've always had a higher power, perhaps we had been leaning too heavily on reason capitalizing. Again, it's our god you could read this book a thousand times i'd never see that thank god somebody pointed it out to me that was armed right reason is our higher power oh wow they're confirming it look how it says in the top of 54 we would not believe in our own reasoning lowercase it there for a reason but then it says yes we had been faithful listen to this this is the reason we had been faithful not just regular faithful right william no what kind of faithful abjectly faithful to the watts god of reason god of re they don't even spit they don'T even let you guess anymore they literally spell it out for us we've discovered that faith had been involved all time trickier saying that nobody's an atheist or an agnostic look and then it goes into this whole work thing how we doing on time 5 57 we're almost there we're gonna do an hour maybe buckle it free worships like we worship stuff it says here we worship people look at the word worship but use three times in their worship worship where we worship people sentiments money things ourselves worshipfully to five times say paragraph five times Lou pointed it out say that again buddy no Louis just pointed it out a few minutes ago what does it say No, worshipped. Oh, yeah. Worshipfully worshiped five times. Same paragraph. Beautiful. Oh, yes, I see that there. Five times. Hold on a second. Thank you, Louie. Worship. Where's the other one, William? You've got worship, worshipfully. Oh, worshipful. There it is. I got it. Worships. And then there's one more at the bottom. Worship, so five times, same thing. So we're willing to worship everything except God. We're willing to worship stuff and ruin our life, but we don't want to worship a god. Anybody ever worship their feelings? Oh, oh, oh. Hence, we sit down at the bottom of the thing. Look, at the top it says God of Reason, and in the last paragraph, what's it say, Janine? Bottom of 54. Yep, sorry. That's okay. Hence, We Saw. hence we saw the reason isn't everything neither is reason as most of us use it entirely dependable all right stop for a second how come they they must have made a mistake reasons not capitalized anymore because it's really not a god right yeah really not going to work for us it says um people rose above their problems on the top of 55 they say that god made these things possible that we say this in rooms right and we only smile the people smile they smirk that's what they're saying we've had seen spiritual release but we like to tell us if it wasn't so just don't drink and go to meetings put the plug in the jug you're sitting there we're smiling in the room we're talking about god and people say for me it's don't drink and going to meetings I've heard it a million times not like a few right anybody ever fooled themselves anybody ever fool themselves what's the next couple of sentences on top of 55 actually we are fooling ourselves for deep down in every man woman and child hold on Finney hold on anybody here a man woman child raise your hand if you're one of those all right so that includes everybody here go ahead is a fundamental idea of god it may be obscure by all the stuff we worship right and then look at the words guys as we go down the page he he god god power great reality he and then again we can only clear the ground a bit if our testimony helps sweep away prejudice they're still talking about that damn prejudice and abijah the icons of courtesy to search Dillogy within yourself, then if you wish, you can join us on the lowercase broad highway. Lowercase, William? No. You've been born uppercase. Highway with God. That's our fellowship, guys. The broad highway and if you choose to believe that, are you going to win or lose, William? You're going to wins. Can't fail. He says, with this attitude, you cannot fail. Yet we've been failing all by ourselves with this reason our whole lives. Give us a promise after this attitude you can't fail. In this book, you will experience of a man who thought, he says it again, bottom of 55, thought he was an atheist. Right? He had grown up with, you know, a minister's son, blah, blah. It depressed him. He didn't want to think about God anymore. But the guy is drunk. he's in a hospital, right? And then he cried out. If there's a God, he certainly hasn't done anything for me. Anybody have that thought before? There's two people that had that thought, right? Well, the answer to that question, there's two answers. Yes, or you're lying. Just kidding. Right? God, right. He certainly hasn'T done anything for mE. I know you've had that though, But later, alone in his room, he asked himself the question, is it possible that all those – what type of people were you? Religious. We're not a religious organization because it said that. Is it possible those religious people I have known are wrong? While pondering the answer, he felt as though he lived in hell. Anybody ever experience that? Then like a thunderbolt, a great thought came to him. Who are you? Zoe, Dave, Diane, Lori, Pat, Anthony, Nicole, Mary G., Jesse, Roxanne, Lolo, Richard, Arlene, Nikki, Rob, Giselle. I didn't get everybody, but who are you to say there's no God? Who are we to say they're no God'? You got nothing going on that we're here at 5 o'clock on a Sunday in August. Who are we to say there's no God? This is the message we need to get out there, guys. This is what the book says. The Mary counts he tumbled out of bed and standing up. What's it say, William? Stumbled, sorry, tumbling to his knees. Tumbles to his knee. He went down to his needs to pray. In a few seconds, he was overwhelmed by the conviction of what, Manny? Presence of God. And then later he stood in the presence of infinite love and power. He had stepped from the bridge to shore. He couldn't get there before with the God of reason, right, William? Yes. Now for the first time he lived in constant companionship with his creator. his alcohol look at what it says on the bottom of the page guys his alcoholic problem was taken away but who took it it's done he stole god takes it it was taken away guys recovered the purpose of alcoholics anonymous is to get recovered obsession leaves right so we're always going to have the mind we just won't have the body problem anymore because god takes it and we get recovered but if you just hang around and don't do this work you'll be dealing with that thought forever if you're lucky it says at the top of 57 did somebody say something okay seemingly on the topof57 he could not drink even if he would melissa what's the second step read melissa God came to leave that who are greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Wait, what's the last line of that paragraph say? What is it, a miracle of healing? No, top of 57. God has restored his sanity. God had restored his insanity. You see where we're at? We're at step two. It said God had to restore his sanity and then it says, what is this but a miracle of healing. Yet its elements are simple circumstances made him willing to believe. William, how's the third step prayer start? God I offer myself to thee. What does it say next line? He humbly offered himself to his maker. So guys we're ending two and we're on our way into three. Does everybody see that? We're on Our Way Into Like The Third. He humbling offered himself to God. And so God restored us all, all the first 100 to our right mind. Restored them to sanity. To this man it was sudden, some of us grow into it a little, grow into it more slowly. Check this out. Let's see. Janine, you are a big recruiter for this group. Please read really slow the last two sentences of the second step. How many God mentions are there? Of these last two sentences? Last two sentences, but... Oh, but he, one, has come to all who have honestly sought him, two. When we draw near to him, three, he, four, discloses himself, five, to us. Second step over, guys. Five times last two sentences. We're talking about God. What time is it? 606. A buck-oh-six to cover one and two. Right? tomorrow at 4 15 we're doing three everybody here should have the directions for three we play a game tomorrow william you're gonna lead that right baby all right and uh maybe take finney and so i don't know take a couple of people with you play are we prepping for four as well or are we just doing three we prep for four we always prep for i just put uh the third step sort of like the homework in the chat. So basically you're going to look up God mentions in the steps, count them. You're going for the word honesty, highly all selfish words in one color, all God words in another color. That's it easy. And again, like Anthony said, right? The only reason that we're doing this is just so that hopefully people can bring other people through the steps. Right. What time tomorrow? Four 15, 15 Monday, Wednesday and Friday. It'll be four 15 Eastern time. Thank you. Somebody asked for Indira, can you give me directions to attend other meetings? There are no other meetings. It's just us.