The Newcomers He Sponsors Now Walk in as Recovered Members – Peter

About This Speaker Tape

East Coast Convention -

June 23 1988 Peter P. was a skeletal 140 pounds bleeding from places he shouldn't be and praying for death on the streets of Brooklyn. He describes a total collapse of his external world—the white picket fence the house and the marriage all evaporated—leaving him a homeless wanderer. The turning point came when his father a tough man of compassion found him in the gutter and refused to lose his son. Peter maps the transition from the 'insidious insanity' of the thinking mind to a life of 'chopping wood and carrying water.' He reflects on the wreckage of stealing from his father's checkbook and the terror of the Manhattan tombs eventually finding a spiritual anchor in the 'sacred rooms' of AA and the methodical work of the Big Book. Today he views his life not as a series of obligations but as a collection of 'get tos,' moving from a place of insecurity to one of inner security.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:45 Peter P. reflects on his 21st sobriety anniversary and calling his family to thank them.
• 4:12 Description of the physical wreckage and desperation of June 23, 1988.
• 8:30 The moment of surrender and the feeling of being a 'vacuum' with no conception of a Higher Power.
• 11:15 Laughter: Story about his father paying street people to find him in Brooklyn.
• 16:40 Discussion of the 'thinking mind' as the greatest enemy and the need for spiritual discipline.
• 22:10 Reflection on childhood insecurity and the first time drinking Cold 45 beer for acceptance.
• 27:50 Step 1 — Powerlessness and Unmanageability: The futility of 'putting the plug in the jug'.
• 32:15 The horror of being locked up in the Manhattan tombs and the subsequent relapse.
• 38:40 The 'itch': A tense moment with his father on the back porch before leaving for Minnesota.
• 44:10 Entering the 'sacred rooms' of AA and meeting his first sponsor.
• 48:20 The Big Book assignment: Underlining 'must' and 'should' in the first 164 pages.
• 55:10 Closing thoughts on the 'shattered circles' of family being put back together through the 12 Steps.