The Magic Sentences of a Sponsor – Tom F.

About This Speaker Tape

1965, a one-room apartment behind the Cork and Fork on Westwood Boulevard. Tom F. is hiding bottles from himself, living in a blackout fog where he’s either ripping his house apart or taking a nap on the living room rug. He describes himself as a "chicken shit drinker," a man who worked bottle A into bottle B just to keep his mouth shut. After a failed suicide attempt involving a hundred sleeping pills and a bottle of scotch, he wakes up in a green room at UCLA Medical Center, only to stop at a liquor store for a quarter of vodka and a quarter of scotch the moment he's released.

He found his way to a meeting in West LA, purple in the face and sweating through a cold January night. His sponsor didn't offer a hug; he offered "magic sentences" and the cold truth that sobriety means no pills and no beer with Mexican food. Through a fearless inventory and a debt of $16,000, Tom leaned on a Higher Power to navigate a dysfunctional life and a second marriage.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Tom W. opens by reflecting on the danger of long-term sobriety and forgetting the 'loaded' days.
• 5:15 Story of the car wreck in Arkansas and the record-breaking blood alcohol level.
• 12:40 The 'chicken shit drinker'—detailing the logistics of hiding booze in the kitchen and garage.
• 18:20 The failure of psychiatric therapy and the 'Beautiful Mind' drugs.
• 25:10 The suicide attempt and the subsequent stay in a mental institution.
• 31:45 The Christmas prayer of 1965 and the first meeting at Ohio Street.
• 36:10 Laughter: The interaction with his first sponsor and the 'grass weapon' comment.
• 42:30 The Fourth Step: Moving from Catholic confession to a fearless moral inventory.
• 46:15 The grind of the Eighth and Ninth Steps: Paying back $16,000 in debts.
• 52:10 The 'dysfunctional' household and the divorce in 1974.
• 58:40 Dealing with the death of his wife in 1985 and the 'trudging' of 1986.
• 1:04:15 Reflections on aging, arthritis, and living in the 'wreckage of the future'.