The Feelings of Loneliness and Utter Defeat That Preceded the Solution – 1966 – David B.

About This Speaker Tape

Eddies Follies - 1966

A career in the Bank of Montreal provided the backdrop for Dave B.'s descent into a life of cerebral hemorrhages missing toes and a fur coat worn with nothing underneath while standing on a bank parapet. He recounts the early chaotic days of the Montreal group where the 'rehabilitation' plan involved gambling for funds to send drunks to the Belgian brothers. After a period of total defeat and a stint in a lunatic asylum Dave B. found a copy of the Big Book and a connection to a woman named Bobby in New York. He reflects on the transition from the rigid early membership applications—which required 'beginner classes' and threatened expulsion for drinking—to the grace of the 12 Steps. Now a grandfather he views his sobriety as a gift far better than he deserves maintaining a grateful heart to avoid the 'Jekyll and Hyde' of his past.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Chairman opens the meeting and welcomes beginners.
• 2:15 Reading of the 12 Steps.
• 6:40 Dave B. begins speaking; describes the early Saturday night group's gambling games.
• 10:15 Dave B. discusses the early trial-and-error period before the 12 Traditions were established.
• 15:30 Dave B. reflects on his childhood fears and the 'will to fail' regarding his father's banking career.
• 22:10 The Winnipeg years: the fur coat incident and the bank parapet.
• 31:45 The cerebral hemorrhage in Vancouver and the descent into self-pity.
• 38:20 The 'interdiction' and time spent in the Verdun Protestant Hospital.
• 44:10 The 1944 bottom: feelings of hopelessness and reading the Big Book.
• 50:15 Dave B.'s first contact with Bobby in the New York AA office.
• 55:30 Dave B. reads the 1946 membership application and the strict rules of the early Montreal group.
• 62:10 Dave B. closes by reading the original six steps of recovery.