The Ego That Made Him Think He Was an Unsung Genius – Mike

About This Speaker Tape

A state of dumbness is where Michael M. finds himself after seven years of sobriety a place where he can finally stop planning his shares and start absorbing the truth. He traces a jagged line from a childhood in a Chicago ghetto and gang life to a career as an engineer eventually drifting through the land movement and ashrams before hitting a bottom of 106 pounds in San Francisco.

He admits he spent years resisting the label of alcoholic believing instead that he was simply a 'sensitive idealist' or an 'unsung genius' who happened to do everything to excess. The turning point came in Santa Cruz where the mirror of another man's 'A**hole' behavior forced him to look at his own desolation. Now he views recovery as a process of getting back the man he actually is rather than the ghost he was while chasing a high.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:15 Michael M. opens with a joke about his 'state of dumbness' and the desire chip
• 1:30 Discussion on 'Unsung Geniuses Anonymous' and the ego of the 'sensitive idealist'
• 2:45 The catalyst in Santa Cruz: seeing an 'A**hole' and realizing his own desolation
• 4:10 Childhood in the Chicago ghetto, gang involvement, and early misfit status
• 5:30 The 'medicinal' eight gallons of 120-proof brandy in the camper
• 6:45 Hitting a physical bottom: weighing 106 pounds in San Francisco
• 8:15 The five-year struggle to accept the label of alcoholic vs. the social drinker
• 9:30 Laughter: Discussion on the length of the shares and George's reaction
• 10:15 Mention of the Big Book and the concept of recovering vs. being cured
• 11:00 Story about a 12-step call with Jerry J. and 'cramming' the Big Book