The AA Unity Of Drunken Mongrels And Spiritual Misfits – Tom B.

About This Speaker Tape

Greensboro, North Carolina, 1950. A fifteen-year-old stands before a bathroom mirror and watches himself take a drink of Cream of Kentucky. In that moment, the "big hole" in the middle of him closes. Tom B. describes his life as a series of extremes—fast forward or stop—driven by a "strange insanity" akin to a man who repeatedly puts his hand on a hot wood stove, convinced it won't burn him this time.

A self-styled intellectual and former seminary student, Tom spent years trying to manipulate his way into sobriety, even wearing a dirty blue bathrobe to mimic Eastern meditators in hopes of a lightning-bolt awakening. He speaks of the "drunken mongrels and spiritual misfits" who built a fellowship based on a common peril and a common solution. To Tom, recovery isn't a mental exercise but a surrender to a Higher Power and a commitment to the unity of the community, the only thing keeping him from the bottle.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:45 Laughter: Tom jokes about the Higher Power's lack of sex.
• 6:15 Discussion of Tradition 1 and the vital importance of AA unity.
• 12:30 The 'wood stove' metaphor explaining the nature of alcoholic insanity.
• 18:45 Tom describes his childhood as 'Pudding Head' and his hero, Uncle Dud.
• 25:10 The story of the first drink (Cream of Kentucky) and the 'hole in the middle' of him.
• 32:20 Tom's struggle with the 'red chip' and his attempt at meditation in a dirty bathrobe.
• 38:15 The relationship with Bill C. ('Grumpy') and the lesson of 'living your way into good thinking'.
• 45:30 The moment of surrender on July 20, 1965, and the decision to return to AA.
• 52:10 Sponsorship with Harry: the difference between a counselor and a sponsor.
• 58:40 Reflections on the death of his father and the nature of spiritual growth.
• 1:02:15 The 'marbles' analogy explaining the first three Steps.