Steve at the 3rd Appalachian Regional Roundup – 2022

About This Speaker Tape

1983, a cul-de-sac Halloween party. A man in full clown regalia conducts interviews with a beer can as a microphone. Years later, that same man, Scott, shows up at a treatment facility to have lunch with Steve L. It is a glimpse into the wreckage and the quiet, steady presence of the recovering community. Steve speaks on the paradox of the twelfth step: that we are prepared for the sole purpose of being of use to others, and that is the only thing that actually makes us feel better.

He describes "spiritual narcolepsy," the tendency to doze off from his Higher Power, and uses the metaphor of 3D glasses—when they are off, the movie is the same, but the experience is diminished, fuzzy, and flat. He admits to "end-of-the-month ethics," the temptation to compromise principles when the rent is due. For Steve, surrender isn't a voluntary choice but an instantaneous event preceded by a long, painful resistance.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Steve L. opens by thanking the committee and Bobby for hosting the weekend.
• 4:15 Story about Scott's early days as a non-sober clown in a cul-de-sac.
• 11:20 Discussion on the 12th Step and the purpose of a spiritual awakening.
• 15:40 Laughter: Steve describes the struggle of resisting baldness and his daughter's blunt intervention.
• 21:10 The 3D glasses analogy for spiritual connection and the 'sixth sense'.
• 26:30 A moment of honesty about 'spiritual narcolepsy' and road rage.
• 32:15 Reflections on the integrity of the Big Book and avoiding 'academic' recovery.
• 38:40 The struggle with sponsorship and the temptation to choose sponsees based on convenience.
• 45:10 Discussion on 'end-of-the-month ethics' in a business setting.
• 52:00 Honesty about the early years of marriage and ignoring Connie C.'s emotional needs.
• 58:15 Tom I.'s advice on spiritual balance versus time management.