Step 8 — Made a List – Rick H. – Wilson House Big Book Workshop Retreat – 2024

About This Speaker Tape

Sonia and Rick dismantle the heavy lifting of Steps 8 and 9, moving from the static list of the Fourth Step to the active wreckage of the real world. Sonia maps out the 'disease of relationships,' tracing how her social anxiety and 'chameleon' personality left her without an internal self, leading her to blow up every connection she touched. Rick digs into the grit of financial amends and the ghosts of the past, recounting a stolen motorcycle from high school and the gut-punch of a former friend's betrayal.

Both speakers work through the specific pain of parenting in recovery, from the shame of a child's 'drug free' tattoo to the relief of co-parenting with a former spouse. They frame the Ninth Step not as a way to clear a conscience, but as a way to stop the isolation and finally walk out of the cage they unlocked in Step 4.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Introduction to Steps 8 and 9 and the concept of 'faith without works is dead'.
• 2:15 Sonia discusses the 'disease of relationships' and her history of social anxiety.
• 6:40 Sonia describes the 'cage' of Step 4 and the freedom of Step 9.
• 8:20 Rick discusses making amends to deceased grandparents by reading a letter at their gravesite.
• 11:10 Rick shares the story of his father's death from cirrhosis of the liver.
• 15:30 Laughter: Rick's story about the 'AA meeting' grocery basket and the man he betrayed.
• 21:00 Rick recounts stealing a motorcycle in high school and the eventual financial amends.
• 26:15 Rick discusses his son's 'drug free' tattoo.
• 31:40 Rick's approach to financial amends for insurance fraud through anonymous acts of service.
• 36:20 Rick reads the Ninth Step promises from the Big Book.
• 41:10 Sonia discusses the 'ego deflating' necessity of admitting one is wrong, not just saying sorry.
• 46:30 Sonia's experience with a 'spiritual' hawk appearing during amends to her father.