Step 7: The Moral Leper – Barney M.

About This Speaker Tape

Barney M. traces his path from a high-flying television news anchorman in Detroit and California to a man living in a Santa Monica apartment with six children and a nanny he couldn't afford to pay. He dismantles the myth of the 'functioning' alcoholic admitting he spent years pretending to have his shit together while losing days to blackouts that left him waking up in Jamaica with no memory of how he got there.

Barney describes his early resistance to the program viewing the Big Book as stodgy and the meetings as boring but he eventually found a way forward through mindless action—mopping floors and stacking chairs—rather than intellectualizing his recovery. He makes the case that motives don't matter as long as a newcomer puts their ass in the chair and leaves their head outside.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Barney M. introduces himself and discusses his history with the Canyon Club.
• 3:15 Barney discusses his childhood in a South Side Chicago Irish Catholic neighborhood.
• 7:40 The 'magic discovery': The realization that drinking makes him feel better regardless of life circumstances.
• 11:20 Laughter: Story about waking up in Kingston, Jamaica after a blackout.
• 15:45 Barney describes his 'horrible sobriety problem' and his first conversation with his sponsor.
• 18:30 Barney's critique of the Big Book and the Traditions, and his initial hatred for meetings.
• 21:10 The 'floor mopper' incident: Being told to mop floors instead of reading poetry to the group.
• 25:00 Barney describes his living situation in Santa Monica with six kids and a nanny.
• 28:15 Barney's advice to newcomers: 'Put your ass in the chair and leave your head outside.'
• 31:00 Discussion on the importance of action over thinking in recovery.