Step 6 and the Dilemma of Grow or Go – Sandy B.

About This Speaker Tape

Sandy B. maps out the terrifying prospect of a life without alcohol arguing that the real miracle isn't sobriety but finding happiness in it. He traces his path from a 'skinny teenage neurotic' to a Marine Corps jet pilot whose drinking eventually cost him his wings and his career.

He describes the crushing humility of being retrained as an air traffic controller while shaking from DTs and the 'worst duress' of being marched into an AA meeting at Bethesda Naval Hospital. Sandy B. dismantles the illusion of the 'middle of the road' and the danger of keeping all options open eventually finding a strange grace in a tragedy—discovering that a plane crash which killed his former colleagues was the very thing that saved him from a life of resentment over his lost promotion.

He makes the case for a spiritual life where problems aren't solved but removed.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Sandy B. opens with a joke about the only requirement for sobriety being not drinking.
• 5:15 Discussion on the 'miracle' of AA: getting happy with not drinking.
• 12:40 Sandy B. describes being marched under duress into an AA meeting at Bethesda Naval Hospital.
• 16:20 The 'blue bathrobe' confrontation: a turning point in Sandy B.'s willingness to face the truth.
• 22:10 Sandy B. discusses his identity as a 'primary alcoholic' and his Catholic background of guilt.
• 31:45 The loss of his wings as a jet pilot and his transition to air traffic controller.
• 38:10 The 'Marine Corps Passover' and the all-consuming nature of resentment.
• 42:30 A moment of clarity: reading about the plane crash that killed the team he would have been on.
• 48:15 The 'black hole' analogy and the necessity of changing one's mind.
• 54:20 Sandy B. discusses the 'blind spots' of selfishness, using a story about his daughter's college tuition.
• 58:10 Analysis of Step 6 and the pursuit of perfection versus 'getting by'.
• 62:45 Closing thoughts on the Serenity Prayer and the power of a Higher Power. Laughter and Applause.