Step 2 – Judy A. – Wilson House Big Book Workshop Retreat – 2020

About This Speaker Tape

Chris and Judy lead a workshop at the Wilson H., dissecting the transition from the Oxford G.'s rigid religious requirements to the spiritual exercises of the Big Book. Chris describes the 'after the dash'—the mental wreckage that persists even when the bottle is gone—illustrated by his rage at a 'tilapia lady' blocking his path to vodka and his internal vitriol toward fellow meeting-goers. He recounts hitting a wall of job loss and legal threats, which led him to the Joe and Charlie tapes and a rigorous application of the steps.

Judy shares her struggle with a Higher Power who 'kills little girls' daddies,' moving from a place of spiritual bankruptcy and family chaos to a total surrender on a shag carpet, finally accepting a Higher Power not through intellect, but through the wreckage of her love life and children.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Introduction and the spirit of the Wilson House.
• 2:15 Discussion of the Oxford Group and the early history of the 12 Steps.
• 6:40 Chris explains the 'after the dash' in Step 1.
• 8:15 Laughter: The story of the 'tilapia lady' at the liquor store.
• 12:30 Chris describes the 'untreated alcoholic' acting sober in meetings while feeling insane.
• 15:45 The impact of the Joe and Charlie tapes and the decision to work the Big Book.
• 22:10 Judy's experience with Step 2 and the struggle with religious baggage.
• 26:30 Judy discusses the 'We Agnostics' chapter and the concept of control.
• 30:15 Judy's trauma regarding her father's death and her resistance to a Higher Power.
• 34:45 The 'magic list' of partner qualifications and the wreckage of family life.
• 37:20 Judy's moment of total surrender on the shag carpet.
• 41:00 Closing: Group meditation and a collective Third Step surrender.