Step 12 — Carrying the Message – Rick H. – Wilson House Big Book Workshop Retreat – 2024

About This Speaker Tape

Sonia and Rick map out the dual nature of Step 12, framing it as a transition from being a 'consumer' of recovery to a 'provider' of the message. Sonia traces her growth through the 'neurotic cleaning' of church basements and the humbling realization that her cupcakes were more about accolades than service. She dismantles the walls she built around women, learning to trust through the vulnerability of asking a stranger to be her friend.

Rick uses the metaphor of Play-Doh to describe a sobriety that must remain pliable and learnable, rather than hardening into a crusty ball of ego. He shares the gritty reality of his auto shop, where service looks like fishing a hidden nip bottle out of a taillight compartment for a customer. Together, they argue that service isn't just about coffee commitments, but about the spiritual awakening required to see people as humans rather than dollar signs.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Reading of the 12th Step suggestion from the Big Book.
• 4:15 Sonia discusses her early days of 'neurotic cleaning' in a church basement.
• 8:30 Sonia's story about the cupcakes and the check on her motives.
• 14:20 Sonia describes the impact of her behavior on a newcomer who wanted to learn how to set boundaries with men.
• 18:45 Sonia's struggle with trusting women and her request to Kathy to 'help me learn how to be friends with women'.
• 25:10 Sonia discusses the emotional sobriety required to accept her mother's limited capacity for affection.
• 31:00 Sonia's conversation with her child, Atticus, about the soul and the flesh.
• 36:40 Rick introduces the 'Play-Doh' metaphor for a pliable recovery.
• 42:15 Rick's story about fishing a nip bottle out of a customer's car taillight.
• 48:30 Laughter: Rick describes his 'train wreck' visits to an atheist meeting.
• 55:10 Rick explains how he moved a hospital meeting to his own house during COVID.
• 61:00 Rick's final thoughts on moving from a consumer to a provider of the message.