Step 10 – Hector E. – FOTSNY – 2003

Again, thanks a lot and I hope we will get a good host for you guys. And I'll give you to Hector. Good morning, everybody. My name is Hector. I'm a real alcoholic. Yes, I am. I want to thank also myself, Rick and Bart, for putting this together, you know, bringing all these kindred spirits who love the book, who love Alcoholics Anonymous, and who love each other. I also want to thank the two gentlemen from Texas and also Peter, you know. I learned a lot from them. They're wonderful, wonderful messengers of, you know, the book, the program, and God. So let's give all these people a round of applause. I want to... Mike asked me to make this little announcement. I'm staying in Manhattan for a week and I'm speaking in New Jersey, New Jersey, Wednesday, August 6th. So if you want to know where, there are pamphlets right there, okay? Okay, I'm supposed to do steps 10 and 11. And I'd like to start the meeting with a meditation and I'm going to say a prayer. Okay, so if you can drop the dishes and the things and relax in your... Yeah. Just let go. Just, if you feel like it, close your eyes. Relax your body. And I'm going to lead us in a meditation and a prayer. This is a prayer that I do before I do every workshop. How wonderful it is to know and to take a moment, just a moment, and pause to go within. And to let go of the past. And to let go of the past. And the future. And to concentrate in the now. Where God is. And as I turn within, I know that every person here turns within to the same underlying power. This indwelling presence is our common denominator. I lovingly call this power God. I know that God is my life. And I know that this force... So that all good is the true identity of everybody here. We're all one and the same. And I know that this workshop is a divine idea in the mind of God. That the compelling activity of the universe brought us together. That this morning, there's good loving work for us to do together. With great joy in my heart. And I'm blessed. I bless and give thanks for the activities about to take place. Fully knowing that these sober brothers and sisters are God's mouthpieces. Expressing God's love, God's wisdom, God's compassion, with God's perfect clarity and gentleness. I know that I don't make it happen. We don't make it happen. We just make it happen. We make it welcome. I declare this beautiful workshop a safe and sacred place. And we stay in silence. Inviting the presence. Listening closely. Mercy. Promise. Kindness. echoes of the words cheers prayer, peace, and though may be bitter names in each and every bit of it there are so many as we get used to it. and please now join me in the serenity prayer God after the serenity just assess the thing and the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference Amen I love that ok I'm supposed to do steps 10 and 11 this morning ok step 10 continue to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it we are supposed to read from page 84 starting with this thought brings us to 10 ending at bottom of page 85 that means more action what is step 10 to me and remember whatever I say from the podium applies only to me you can't believe totally I'm not saying anything I'm not saying anything otherwise and I respect and honor that this is what I believe what I practice and what I share for me step 10 is a daily tool to keep us unblocked from the sunshine of the spirit so that we can be a maximum use to God and those about us I'll repeat that step 10 is a daily tool to keep me unblocked from the sunshine of the spirit so that we can be a maximum use to God and those about us on page 85 page 84 says we continue to watch for selfishness dishonesty resentment and fear when these crop up we ask God at once to remove them we discuss them with someone immediately preferably our sponsor and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help love and tolerance of others out there in the world and we have ceased fighting anything or anyone even alcohol for by this time sanity will have returned and on page 85 says to some extent we have become God conscious you see it says by this time sanity will have returned and because of this sometimes I understand people drive around members of the AA says sober and crazy I don't understand that see I'm sober and the book tells me we who have recovered are miracles of mental health that's the quote from the book we who have recovered not in recovering we who have recovered are miracles of mental health okay see unfortunately because of this because we are human beings, you know, sometimes we forget we are one with God, and we get our humanity takes over, and we get afraid, and we act up. And by the way, nobody gets to be perfect in AA. It's physical improvement, not physical imperfection, okay? And when we hurt somebody, or when we have a resentment, sometimes I don't hurt anybody, but I have a resentment against that group, but it's something, you know, I have to do a step 10, because if I stay angry or have a resentment, like Peter said yesterday, resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. It doesn't work. You see, it's like an acid inside of me. It really eats me up. So I have to be free, really, of all that, so that God can use me and I can be at peace. And by the way, my troubles are always my troubles, and I create them. There are no victims, only willing volunteers. The book tells me so. Page 62. So our troubles are of our own making. Page 133. But it is clear that we made our own misery. God didn't do it. Avoid then the deliberate manufacture of misery. And I have another quote from the 12 and 12, which is really even worse. Page 90. It is a spiritual axiom. Axiom means undisputable truth. It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us, with me. Even if somebody hurts us, and we are sore, we are in the wrong also. I hate this crap. Because that means I cannot blame you for anything. Because if you hurt me, it's my time to show you how forgiving I am, how loving I am, how much I am at peace, that I can see you just like somebody else who is having a bad moment, or like the book says, you know, we have to talk to people, they are just sick like we are. And you see, I have a tendency to react, not to respond. And they taught me before I react to do these three things. And I really want you to write them. I was taught this. Before I want to say something to you when you talk to me, right? I have to think about these three things. One. What I'm going to say. One. Is it true? Two. Is it necessary? Three. And the third one. Is it most important? Is it kind? So, before I open my mouth, is it true? Is it necessary? Or is it kind? Okay? You see, I have to change. The 12 steps are to change sector. And I don't change myself. God changes me. Because I don't do anything. I allow God to change me. See, because when I have a problem, I don't have a problem with you. Because you see, one of the things I said before, I want to repeat it. We don't see them as they are. We see them as we are. We don't see them. I don't see you as you are. I see them as I am. You notice, for instance, I get in the morning. I'm going to go driving. If I do my work, I do my prayer, my meditation, I bless my car, and I bless my house before I leave. I go, I get on Sunset Boulevard, and I just flow through. Somebody wants to get in? I go, I get in the car, I get in the car, I get in the car, I get in the car, I get in the car, I get in the car, and I bless my house before I leave. I go, I get on Sunset Boulevard, and I just flow through. Somebody wants to get in? Please, get in. I don't do my work. I'm in a rush because I have to go to the gym. Oh, this is very important. I get out of the... Oh, what is wrong with this stupid street? I start cursing. It's not spiritual language what I do when I'm angry. You know what I mean? And what is wrong with this effing idiot? Get out of my way! You see? It's the same people, the same place. I'm angry. I'm angry. I see my while walking. Why should I? Go. Yeah, no. There aint a world of human beings who would be in this way. And, you're asking me this. Remember, when I'm angry. When I'm angry, I'm going tomber me take the Children to sleep before I go in the car. Yeah. And what is new in New York? Oh, I'm gonna say another word. There are so many media ads today. Why would you want to go to New York? There are so many unions right now. Calm down. Can somebody say. Why you all are angry? Oh, just one word? sponsor you my mom my wife my husband my uncle my children my neighbors is to change Hector and Hector doesn't change himself Hector allows God to change him okay if I want to live in harmony with the people around me I have to change my spirit has to be free of selfishness dishonesty resentment and fear you know so when I am at fault when I have it resentment I have to make amends because you see if I have resentment the book says the number one killer I'm going to drink and for me to drink is to die okay the following is a guide to assess any problem situation before making amends I got it from the page 91 to 12 and 12 okay and he has full suggestion in all situations we need to ask God for and these are the four suggestions one self-restraint to honest analysis of what is involved to honest analysis of what is involved three willingness to admit when the fault is ours willingness to admit when the fault is our and for an equal willingness to forgive when the fault is elsewhere okay so I've got to my knowledge there's only three kind of inventories in and you know and the book of Alcoholics Anonymous but there may be more it's number four inventory step four right and then we have the spot on the spot inventory that means I'm having trouble with you right away I do something wrong and I apologize right away that's on the spot and then the one we can do at the end of the day which is basically the first step and that's the one we can do at the end of the day which is basically the first step in the basically the fourth step but it's called a daily inventory and they had given me a format I don't use it that much because you know when I do something wrong I know what I'm supposed to do the other day I was a meeting and they had saved all the seats there were ten people and fifty seats and all the seats were saving I didn't get to a spiritual about that and I was talking to the secretary and this guy come over and but in and he says something I didn't like and I said I didn't react I walked away when I walked away he says something else I didn't like my reaction was not spiritual and I said something to hit was not spiritual and I knew right then and there happy to make an amend I was not ready yet but I came back I don't go to the meeting that often I came back the next week and I said I want to talk to you you know what I said to you last week was really improper I want to apologize I was really wrong and I apologize it's anything else I should do you know he said no I want to apologize to you you know so I didn't write but this is the format they gave me to write what I want to just you know see what is that I am doing I do three columns one of the first one is I'm resentful at or I'm fearful at the second column because what I write what happened the third column it affects my self-esteem personal relations ambitions pocketbook and sexual relations. relationship on the source the name what happened and what affects me right on the back would write this I don't do this right that I go to a meeting but they do two or three of these a day yeah just self obsessed with self these people okay and on the back I write God these are the character defects that if you remove them I would not have them and they will not prevent me from doing your will and I write whatever my character defect is and I look at this and then after I do that I do six and seven I pause I look at them see what would be the spiritual a spiritual quality could replace a character defect if it's anger our obvious peace of love right and then I do the seven step prayer then I'm ready to make the call or go in person and talk to that person because then my house is in order and I can do it without anger and remember anger is always a reaction to fear and fear comes for only two reasons I'm not going to get what I want or I'm going to lose what I already have and remember we operate only on the two conditions of life love or fear love is God fear is the absence of God Okay let's see And after we make we look at what says on page 84 we restoratively turn our thoughts to someone we can enough and next we turn to Peter And now this is not just a experiment here it's a mystery And no it's not just a avonsoph aktuell we throw ourselves away in the tip to our nói Not only we have to make demands, but because I'm so self-obsessed, who can I help? Who can I call? What can I do for AA? Or even for my neighbor, it doesn't have to be AA. What I do for my neighbor because she's not too strong, I bring all the garbage cans on Friday morning, no, Thursday night, and on Friday after the garbage is collected, I put them inside her house. Okay? But I always, because you see the test of our spiritual condition, our religious beliefs, it's wonderful that we do it here, but also we have to carry this kind of thing in all our affairs. It has to be manifested in our lives. The messenger is not what I think, what I know, my intellectual knowledge, or spiritual matter. It's how I conduct my life. And that's more or less all that I have. You know, on the stage, I should speak Spanish. En el paso diez, caramba. Okay, step eleven. So through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only, praying only, praying only. For knowledge, praying only. For knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. I have a friend, Harvey, who has a very wonderful sense of humor, and this, this steps about prayer and meditation. And he taught me that when you talk to God, it's called prayer. And when God talks back to you, it's called schizophrenia. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Harvey is forbidden. That's a very wonderful sense of humor. Okay, step eleven. We'll read from page eighty-five to the end of chapter, the chapter on page eighty-eight. And these short pages, you know, we're given three different formats to teach us how to use prayer at different times of the day. They are not in this order, but I'm going to read them in this order. On awakening. Okay. Page eighty-six. Let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct. Is the mic on? Oh. Okay. We ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest, or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions, we can employ our mental faculties with assurance. So after all, God is the one who is the one who is the one who is the one who is the one who is the one who is the one who is the one who is. So after all, God gave us brains to use. Our thought life will be placed on a much higher plane where our thinking is cleared of wrongdoing. So, they give us a plan how to plan the day. So if we can take a minute, I personally don't do this, but I write the night before what I'm going to do the next day. So when I get up in the morning I'm not lost. And the first thing that go on my list is administration of community in prayer. And I minute that he knows that no-one does what needs to be done. P-M. Prayer and meditation. Then all the other things. First I say hello to God. And I make the connection. And then I do the rest of the thing. Now the book says. In the middle of the day. On page. Bottom page 87. As we go through the day. We pause. The power of pause. Be still. Have a problem. Be still. Bottom of 86. 77. As we go through the day. We pause. When agitated. Or doubtful. And ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves. We are no longer running the show. Because you see. I thought that was my job. I was the general manager of the entire universe. So I haven't renounced the title yet. I can't remember the last time my father rewrote the cover like this now. Now I feel About this. I can reach, I'm lucky that I'm a handsome guy. That I don't change. I have a job. I don't work. it says it works it really does okay and they give us a plan from when we go to bed page 86 nighttime when we retire at night we constructively review our day where we resentful selfish dishonest or afraid it's all characteristics of the ego see the ego is the world of the many god is a world of one but there is one that has all power the book sets the world spiritual world is a world of one the world of the ego is the world of many more cars more relationship more money more houses more sex and it's never enough because the ego is never happy if you have an Oscar you want three Oscars if you have good-looking girlfriend three gratefully I'm gonna say the world of battle do not sort of unhappy and spend it for $60 you 500 that's not it's just us after there's no life in it into the middle and you say hey now go Schulden strong present girlfriends would be better. How about all the girls in the Playboy Mansion? So the ego is never satisfied. It's the world of the many. The world of God is the world of God. Alcohol is cunning, baffling, and powerful, the book says. But there is one, capital O, not 203, that has all power. Now 75%, not 90%, all power. And then they name it. That one is God. May you find him now. And then they list the steps. To me the steps are spiritual tools to develop a conscious contact with God. Do you notice the word recovery is not mentioned in the 12 steps? Do you know the word sobriety is not mentioned in the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous? Not even the name of our disease, alcoholism, is mentioned. But this one word is mentioned nine times. Check it out. Our word is God. Okay? So, when we retire at night, we constructively review our day. Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest, or afraid? Do we owe an apology? Have we kept something to ourselves which should be discussed with another person at once? Were we kind and loving to all? What could have done, what we could have done better? Were we thinking of our selves most of the time? Or we were thinking of what we could do for others? Or what we could pack into the stream of life? But we must be careful not to drift into worry, remorse, or morbid reflection. For that would diminish our usefulness to others. After making our review, we ask God's forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken. Okay? Okay? So, those are three tools we can use on a daily basis. Now I'm going to say some thoughts that I believe about prayer. Inside of me, there is an everlasting source of power, better known as God's grace. If I learn to harness it, that power can heal me and it can inspire me by telling me what to do, how to do it, and it can give me inner peace, and most important of all, it can give me direct connection to the indwelling power of God. Prayer and meditation are the best and most direct ways to access that power. What we call in AA a conscious contact. Okay. Now, about prayer. What is God's grace? The book doesn't tell me what God's grace is. The 12 and 12 doesn't tell me. So I have to go to other sources. And this is my definition of God's grace. And remember, this is my definition of God's grace. This applies only to me. You can use totally, totally different. God's grace for me is an emerited gift. And by the way, the only gift that we get from God. That's the shortest version. But I'm going to give you the full version. God's grace is an emerited gift. God's grace cannot be earned or deserved. God's grace is not in the future. God's grace is operating in me right this second. God's grace is the essence of my entire being. God's grace is God in me. And as children of God, we are heirs to God's grace. Everybody has God's grace inside of him. Which I have to remember our oneness with God. Okay. That we are one with that. And as members of Alcoholics Anonymous, we have to learn how to access that grace through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. So that we can develop that conscious contact with God. So God's grace is an emerited gift. Oh, by the way, God doesn't love me because I am good. He loves me because He is good. Faith without prayer is aimless. And prayer without faith is useless. The most important ingredient in prayer is faith. Pray believing that your prayer is already answered. Because remember, it's the Father's good grace. I forgot the word. It's the Father's good pleasure. These people know. It's the Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom. So pray. Pray believing that your prayer is already answered. Now I'm going to tell you what I believe that prayer is not. Prayer is not a petition. Prayer is not a supplication. And prayer is not begging. And this is what I believe that prayer is. Prayer is a dialogue with God for the purpose of aligning ourselves with the will of God. I'm going to read it again. Prayer is a dialogue with God for the purpose of aligning ourselves with the will of God. Man always longs for a relationship with a higher power. And prayer is a proper vehicle. And by the way, prayer doesn't do anything to God. Prayer does something to the mind of the one praying. Because the nature of God is love. And he never alters. That's what I believe. We must pray only for God's will and guidance. Otherwise we are telling God what to do. And the book tells me the same thing. Page 15. Never was I to pray for myself except as my request bore usefulness to others. Some times prayer is an easy activity. But in general for most of us it's not. You know, as a general rule most people do not enjoy praying. We get bored, lazy, and at times belligerent towards prayer. But we must get back to it if we're going to stay sober. You see, because our life, entire life, is a continuous prayer. Every thought we have is a prayer. Every word we utter is a prayer. Every action we do is a prayer. That's what they mean by pray without seeing. A little bit yesterday when he beautifully said that he believes in the prayer. But he sponsored us. He used your own words to say the same thing. I thought that was gorgeous. Phenomenal. You know. And this is what I believe. It is important not to pray always with the same words and thoughts. Our prayers should be very reflecting the different experiences in our daily living. To develop a strong relationship with the living God, just like any loving friend, we must put time and effort into deepening and strengthening our relationship with Him, our Beloved. And that's what I believe. Because, you know, I have to have a relationship. If I can say just one prayer, whatever prayer it is, and they're all beautiful, I'm not putting them down. I have to talk to God. You know, sometimes I yell at God. And sometimes I use words that are not very good, but He can handle it. You know what I mean? This God that created the whole universe, that makes the cosmos rotate in perfect order, that takes an embryo and makes a baby, that takes a little seed and makes a huge tree, that God can handle my bloated ego. As long as I am talking to God. Okay. And I want to talk a little bit, a little workshop about God. And I want to just share this with you. It's beautiful. And just imagine this. The guy told us, you know, what if God has a desperate need to have a relationship with you? Yes, He yearns. He's nostalgic. He's passionate to have a love affair with you. You know? We need God, but God also needs us. Remember, He loves through us. Because we are His secret weapon in this entire creation. We are unbelievably necessary to God's work. You know? What if God has a love, a passion, He totally aims at you. He's nuts over you. He adores you. He loves you. Think about that. Because, you see, your presence is a confirmation of God's presence. And you are incredibly necessary to God's plan. AA would not work without us. God needs us. He needs to carry His message. The message, He needs our words, our thoughts, our hugging, our smiling. How to do 12 steps? So, we are very necessary to God. And He's madly in love with all of you. Whether you know it or not. He just wants to have a love affair with you. Wouldn't you want to pray to somebody who feels like that towards you? He adores you. He's nuts over you. So, wouldn't you want to pray to that? Wouldn't you want to have a relationship with that? I love that. I was so happy after I took that Yes! I say yes to all of that! Okay. It is good to practice prayer in different places and many times of the day. But it's also very important to set a time for our communion with our higher power. Perhaps in the morning. Perhaps in the morning. You know, we still haven't absorbed all the negativity and we haven't watched the news. Don't watch the news in the morning. You know. Just to dedicate five times to the higher power. Okay? That's called the spiritual practice. What is my spiritual practice? How much do I love God? Well, how much do you love God? Tell me how much time you spend with Him. So, how much time do you watch television? Two hours a day? How much time do you dedicate to God? Two minutes? What are you going to do when you're in trouble? Call Jay Leno? Okay. So, we're going to dedicate maybe a few minutes to God in the morning. And at night. Prayer needs preparation and discipline. Because we must be still in our bodies and quiet in our minds. Remember, be still. Know that I'm God. We must say for the next five or ten minutes nothing matters but my time with God. What I'm going to do is the sustenance for my spiritual growth, my sobriety, and the essence of my entire life. God is all my needs met. Or God could and would if He was so. Pray in secret and pray in silence. Pray in secret and pray in silence. Because you see, every time we pray in public the ego is involved. Remember that ten things for the day, that little pamphlet, that says, you know, do something, a good deed today, but don't tell anybody otherwise it doesn't count. This is the same, same principle. Anonymity. Pray in secret. Okay? And pray in silence. Even when you eat, if you choose to. You don't have to go blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Now, just think, thank you God for this food. God knows. God knows. Thank you God for my car. Thank you God for this magnificent worship. Okay? Now, the highest form of prayer is silence. Why? Because silence is the language of God. That's why we say prayer and meditation. We end up the first eleven steps in silence to listen to the still small voice which is inside of us. Be still. Go inside. To the secret place of the Most High, inside. To touch that divinity which is inside of all of us. Remember, we are physical manifestation of the living God. And inside of us, all of us, whether you know it or you accept it or not, you know, there's a divine particle of God. And that's what twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous are for. To make that conscious contact with the divinity which is inside of all of us. Okay, meditation. God's grace can be best realized by a state of inner silence. A state of inner alertness to receive the highest and most precious of all gifts from God. And the only gift. God's grace. The entire purpose of meditation, is a preparation of our mind and body to receive that gift. We practice the program together that we enter the kingdom of God alone. Because it's inside of all of us. Nobody can help us with that. Okay? And we achieve that conscious contact with our creator. We are truly, truly free of the world of conditions and circumstances. That's not the real world. That's an illusion. The real world, my real life is inside of me. What you're seeing right now is not the real Hector. This is the physical manifestation. The real Hector is inside of me. And he was never touched. It's unsoiled. And he can only communicate with God. You can cut my arm. You cannot touch my God's grace because it's inside of me. My divinity, my soul, my spirit, you cannot touch unless I allow you to. Remember, there are no victims. Only willing volunteers. Meditation is not escape from life. But a peaceful encounter with reality. With who and what I really am. God will reveal himself to us in the stillness of our own soul. And we will know who and what we really are. God is pure spirit and the things of God can only be discerned with the mind. Not with the mind. It has to be the mind. It has to be realized spiritually. You know, for many of us it's really difficult to sit and be quiet. Meditation is a difficult practice to master, you know. But since the purpose of meditation is to receive divine guidance from God, if we want a specific result. I'm going to pray, pray, you know, meditate to get this, this and that. I already failed. Because I'm telling you God, you know, what I need. And I don't know what I need. I thought I needed a Mercedes. I thought I needed gorgeous Ralph Lauren suits and a gorgeous apartment. And I got all that, plus money in the bank, and I ended up dead in intensive care unit for three days. They had to revive me twice. So obviously I don't know what's good for me. You know, there are many forms of meditation. And but there isn't a single one that's suitable for everybody. The biggest problem with meditation is to really hold one thought in the mind. You know, it's impossible. You can hold it for two or three seconds. Don't try. If a thought comes into your mind, just observe it. Don't give it power. If you give it power, it owns you. You know, say, oh, that so-and-so, you know, she did something to me. And just look at it. And it will go away. Just look at it. If you have a thought, for instance, if you have a mantra, mantra is just a word that you may choose love, peace, or whatever, you know, and you repeat it in your mind. When the thought comes, just get back gently. Don't get upset with yourself. Do the mantra with your thought. Or if you're watching your breathing, to your breathing. Okay? Progress in meditation is very, very slow. But like anything else, you know, if you keep doing it, you get better. Oh, and I guarantee you, I guarantee you, Hector guarantees this. If you meditate and pray every day, if you make a short prayer, but if you meditate even 10 minutes in the morning, 10 minutes at night, your life will change irrevocably. I guarantee it. Okay? The purpose of prayer and meditation is to break our attachment to the material world. That's what it is. Nothing requires more discipline than the spiritual way, the spiritual way of life. But nothing gives us greater joy, greater peace, greater security than entering our inner sanctuary and realizing that the Father and I are one. Okay, my beloved ones. I'm going to tell you, I'm going to leave you with the words my sponsor gave me. I was going to talk about this, but this is enough. This is a, I think, Barefoot Bill, did you make the copies? I don't know. Okay. This is a beautiful A-step point program, called meditation. Get a copy. It's free. It's right there at the end of the workshop. And it tells you quite a few things, not just meditation. It talks about one-pointedness, you know, spiritual reading, putting others first, and slowing down, and spiritual association, and different kinds of meditation. And it's for Jews, Gentiles, Buddhists, Muslims, whatever, because it has a mantra for every religion. It is just one page. You can buy 50 books. You're not going to, you're not going to, or you can get the little page and get the message. And I made, we made copies. It's free for you. Okay. Okay. I'm going to just say one more minute. And this is my, my, my sponsor gave me this, and when he gives a workshop with a 12-step, this is what he ends with. Stay on the final line of life. Give freely of what you found. You're certain to be more useful than you have ever been. When you see someone in the program, get the gift. Get it. When you see the light come on, you will be forever lost. You will understand what you never understood. That you have had the privilege of a front row seat to a spiritual experience. That you have seen how great God really is. That you know that God is love, and that he that abideth in love abideth in God, and God abideth in him. Whatever you go, take only love with you. You cannot take nothing greater. You need to take nothing less. It is the man who is a missionary is not in his words. I love you very, very, very much. And I receive so much love from all of you throughout this convention. And I thank you. I feel so privileged and so, so happy to have known all of you. You're just magnificent children of God. I receive your love. And I hope you really know how much I love you. God bless you and thank you. Thank you. It's very precious. Thank you.