Step 10 and the Promise of No Longer Fighting – George

About This Speaker Tape

Upstate New York, a treatment center, and a man weighing 128 pounds who thinks he looks great while his eyes are jaundiced. George G. spent decades fighting a war against a Higher Power, fueled by a childhood of religious rebellion and a "tremendous contempt prior to investigation." He describes a history of leaning over toilet bowls, hanging on for dear life, and trying to fill a hole with everything from Eastern philosophies to witchcraft.

The turning point wasn't a lightning bolt, but a conversation with a disabled Vietnam vet who told him he didn't need to believe—he just needed to ask for help. George recalls the gritty reality of his early sobriety: the "X-Lax test" from a sponsor to prove he wasn't God, and the slow realization that tomorrow never comes. He found his Higher Power not in a temple, but in the "group of drunks" and the simple act of staying in the room. He moved from a state of war to a place of emotional sobriety, finally ceasing the fight.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 George G. opens by discussing the intersection of Step One and Step Two.
• 3:45 Discussion of 'contempt prior to investigation' and his childhood rebellion against religious laws.
• 6:10 George describes his search through Eastern religions, TM, and witchcraft to fill a spiritual hole.
• 10:20 Laughter: George recounts his time in a New York treatment center and his initial defiance.
• 14:15 George discusses the 'We Agnostics' section of the Big Book and the delusion of 'fun' drinking.
• 18:30 A pivotal moment with Joe, a Vietnam vet chaplain, who tells him he doesn't have to believe, just ask for help.
• 23:10 George reflects on the 'insanity' of his self-perception versus the reality of his physical state.
• 27:45 The 'X-Lax' story: A concrete lesson in powerlessness and the limits of the human will.
• 31:20 George explains how he used the 'group of drunks' as his first Higher Power.
• 36:00 Discussion of the 'Spiritual Experience' and the difference between the 'lightning bolt' and the slow process.
• 40:15 George describes his early fear of entering temples and his preference for quiet chapels.
• 44:30 Closing thoughts on the difference between 'trying' and 'doing' in recovery.