Step 10 and the Goal of Remaining Undisturbed – Sandy B.

About This Speaker Tape

Maryland State Convention - 1998

Sandy B. maps out the internal wreckage of a man who felt he was born on the wrong planet using alcohol as the only way to survive a world that felt hostile and intimidating. He traces his descent from a Marine Corps fighter pilot to a washed-up air traffic controller detailing the terrifying physical collapse—vision loss in the cockpit seizures and a six-month stint in a naval hospital's 'nut ward' in a straitjacket. Sandy B. dismantles the 'pride of authorship' over his own failures arguing that the 12 Steps are not about fixing external problems like bankruptcy or divorce but about achieving a state of being 'undisturbed.' He frames sobriety as an 'inside job,' shifting from a materialistic resume of achievements to a spiritual identity as a 'child of a Higher Power,' where the only real goal is to keep the channel open and the noise of character defects silenced.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:45 Sandy B. discusses the energy of the Big Book and the 12 and 12.
• 3:15 Description of the 'three-drink world' and alcohol as the 'secret of life' to fit in.
• 7:20 The danger of flying planes while suffering from physical withdrawal and vision loss.
• 10:10 The 'nut ward' at Bethesda Naval Hospital and the experience of being in a straitjacket.
• 13:40 The arrival of sponsor Bill T. and the '12-step call' that took over his life.
• 17:15 Laughter: The repetitive, 'one-size-fits-all' advice given at meetings for bankruptcy and divorce.
• 22:30 Discussion on the 'Chapter to the Agnostic' and the struggle with surrendering to a Higher Power.
• 26:45 Defining the Higher Power as the force that brings internal change and happiness.
• 30:10 The goal of the 12 Steps: remaining 'undisturbed' regardless of external circumstances.
• 34:20 The contrast between a professional resume and a spiritual resume.
• 37:50 The 'inside job' of recovery and the 'stamp of approval' from a Higher Power.