Sandy B. – Q&A

About This Speaker Tape

Sandy B. leads a raw, wide-ranging Q&A session that functions more as a spiritual report than a textbook. He dismantles the ego's grip on guilt and the 'riddle of existence,' arguing that we cling to our defects because we aren't yet entirely ready to let them go.

He shares concrete wreckage—the physical and mental abuse he heaped on his children and the anguish of his parents—and the turning point of a simple, intuitive trust in an Al-Anon lady named Betsy L. during a sleety winter night in Manassas. Sandy avoids the 'treasure map' of the Big Book becoming the treasure itself, pushing instead for a total surrender of the will.

He describes the absurdity of the 'alcoholic mind' and the gritty reality of parenting in recovery, including a confrontation with a daughter in Orlando who greeted him by screaming, 'Here's my A**hole father.'

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Opening remarks on the nature of Q&A and the fluidity of spiritual perspective.
• 6:15 Story of Betsy Lynch and the first spark of belief in a Higher Power.
• 12:40 Metaphor of the leaves on a tree and the illusion of the separate ego.
• 21:10 Discussion on the destruction of the will vs. trying to make one's will coincide with a Higher Power's.
• 31:40 Step 9: Addressing the regret of past abuse toward children and parents.
• 45:10 Analysis of the 'Promises' and 'Principles' as semi-official additions to the program.
• 54:30 Parenting in recovery: The 'A**hole father' encounter in Orlando.
• 1:05:20 The 'Riddle of our Existence' regarding the removal of character defects.
• 1:15:40 Laughter: The story of the man resigning from AA to drink safely.
• 1:22:10 Closing reflections on the 'treasure map' of the Big Book and the transition into silence.