Ralph W. – Big Book Study – The Thin Line Between Comparing and Identifying – 2018

About This Speaker Tape

Ralph W. traces his path from a childhood in Watts, Los A., where he lived in a two-bedroom apartment with six boys and an absentee drunk father, to a life of high achievement masking a deep-seated fear of being unlovable. He maps out the progression of his drinking—from high school parties to a 'vampire by night' existence in the mid-80s, where he balanced a management career with a secret life of addiction that eventually cost him his dream job.

Ralph describes the wreckage of stealing from his daughter's piggy bank and nearly causing his mother a nervous breakdown. The turning point arrives in 1986 at a skid row treatment center, leading to a 33-year journey of recovery. He emphasizes the 'ripples' of sobriety: seeing his daughter become an attorney and the restoration of his relationship with his mother, framing his recovery as a gift he must use to bless others.

Topics

Timestamps

• 2:15 Ralph discusses the different 'flavors' of AA speakers, comparing them to musical genres.
• 7:40 Childhood in Watts: Ralph describes growing up with six boys in a two-bedroom apartment.
• 11:20 The 'prison' of social anxiety and the desperate need to be liked by others.
• 16:10 The first drink: Ralph describes the 'warm tipsy feeling' and the courage alcohol gave him.
• 21:40 Comparing vs. Identifying: Ralph's struggle to find himself in Bill W.'s story in the Big Book.
• 26:30 The 'vampire by night' phase and the loss of his first management job in 1985.
• 31:10 Hitting bottom: Stealing from his daughter's piggy bank and entering treatment on skid row in 1986.
• 36:45 Sponsorship: Ralph describes meeting Bob Hunt and the fear of asking for help.
• 42:10 The 'ripples' of recovery: Ralph talks about his daughter becoming an attorney and his relationship with his children.
• 46:00 Closing: Ralph reflects on recovery as a gift from his Higher Power.