Pat R. at the Deerfield Beach Study Group – 2021

About This Speaker Tape

Deerfield Beach Study Group - 2021

A life spent in the desert Pat R. describes the brutal friction of early sobriety where '90 and 90' wasn't enough to stop the torment. He recounts the wreckage of a marriage that collapsed after fifteen years of sobriety the shock of a divorce that left him wanting to be a hermit in the Pennsylvania woods and the specific relief found in a 'real' fifth step shared with a man he trusted more than any priest. Pat moves through the mechanics of the program from the 'two-way prayer' of Step 11 to the gritty reality of sponsorship rules—demanding that sponsees chase him with the same urgency they once used to find drugs. He views his past as a 'career' in alcoholism and his current life as a miracle of transformation where the only way out of the desert is to lean in.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Pat R. opens with the promise of a personality change sufficient to recover from alcoholism.
• 3:45 Laughter: Pat describes his early days of 'visiting the fellowship' and calling the rooms a cult.
• 6:10 Discussion on the 'Higher Power of your understanding' and the miracle of choosing one's own conception.
• 9:20 Step 11: Pat explains the difference between petitionary prayer and the 'more Higher Power, less me' approach.
• 12:40 Two-way prayer: The process of writing down every thought, holy or unholy, and inventorying it.
• 16:15 The 'desert' experience: Being accused of stealing money from a clubhouse treasury.
• 21:30 The 'Prayer of Jabez' and the transition to the Deerfield Beach study group.
• 26:40 The devastation of divorce at fifteen years sober and the desire to be a hermit in Pennsylvania.
• 31:10 Meeting Russell S. and the 'Higher Power Squad'u2014the realization that the Big Book alone wasn't enough for him.
• 35:50 The experience at St. Andrews church and the decision to be sponsored by Garrett M.
• 42:10 Sponsorship rules: The five-week workshop and the requirement for sponsees to 'chase' the sponsor.
• 46:30 Laughter: The story of Brian G. chasing him down the Sawgrass Expressway.