Mildred F. at the 7th. Sunlight of the Spirit – 2004

About This Speaker Tape

7th. Sunlight of the Spirit - 2004

A former nun who spent fifteen years drinking in the convent Mildred F. describes a life of 'pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization' marked by thirty-two psychiatric hospitalizations and thirty-eight shock treatments without anesthetic. After a high-speed landslide into homelessness and sleeping on park benches she experienced a sudden spiritual awakening in a psych ward on May 18 1973 which removed her compulsion to drink. She details the slow dismantling of her emotional walls the struggle to move from the head to the heart and the sacred experience of performing a life review for her handicapped sister Dora at the end of her life. Her narrative moves from the isolation of a 'nasty little piece of work' to a place of peace where she can finally put her head on the pillow and like herself.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Mildred F. opens by discussing the upcoming international conference and her relationship with the fellowship.
• 5:40 Recounts her childhood in Saskatchewan and the letter from her father about her brother's transformation through AA.
• 8:15 Details the wreckage of her mental health history: 32 hospitalizations and 38 shock treatments.
• 13:20 Discusses the 'symptom' of drinking and her struggle with self-centeredness and defiance of a Higher Power.
• 17:40 Laughter: Stories about drinking perfume and mass wine while serving as a nun.
• 23:10 Describes the 'high speed landslide into hell' after leaving the convent in 1966.
• 30:50 The spiritual experience on May 18, 1973, in a psych ward that removed the compulsion to drink.
• 36:10 Describes her first year of sobriety living on Skid Row and the process of ego deflation.
• 41:20 Mentions the impact of Clancy's speaking and the realization during her Fourth Step that she was the problem.
• 46:30 Discusses the journey from the head to the heart and the process of letting down her emotional walls.
• 52:10 A detailed account of the final 18 hours with her sister Dora, applying the principles of the program to a deathbed experience.
• 57:40 Closing reflections on the 12 Steps and Traditions and the ability to finally like herself.