Mike S. at the Southern Minnesota Roundup – Mankato, MN – 2018

About This Speaker Tape

A can of beer in the hand of an eight-year-old boy; that was the lesson: men don't cry, they drink. Mike S. grew up in the wreckage of a family defined by unlawful flight and blackout rapes, eventually joining the "largest gang he could find," the U.S.

Army. He spent years destroying his marriage, once leaving a dead dog to rot on a basement floor because he simply did not care. He describes a life of "fluff" and fake sponsorship until a second, harder hit at treatment and the raw honesty of his daughter forced a change.

From the "wet cold" of Germany to the dirt floors of bars, Mike traces the shift from a man who terrified his children to one who stays teachable. He speaks of the brutal reality of the rooms—the suicides and the "blue babies"—and the rigid discipline of a home group. For Mike, sobriety isn't a Hallmark card; it's keeping your yeses and showing up an hour early.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Mike S. opens with a joke about his 'drug log' and his dog eating his dope.
• 4:15 Childhood memories of moving constantly to avoid his father's legal troubles.
• 6:30 The story of the dead puppy and his first beer at age eight.
• 15:40 The smell of the dead dog in the basement and the wreckage of his first marriage.
• 22:10 The 'pain tolerance' of trying to stay sober for 18 months without working the steps or having a sponsor.
• 31:00 Laughter: The story of his reversal vasectomy and the 'ping pong' doctor.
• 42:15 The importance of the 'Live and Let Live' home group and the danger of 'fluff' in recovery.
• 46:30 Tragedy: The account of a friend's suicide and the Big Book on the coffee table.
• 55:10 Discussion on the necessity of working the 12 Steps to avoid the fate of those who don't.
• 62:00 Final thoughts on humility through anonymity and the importance of staying teachable.