Living Sober and the 60-Yard Dash of Early Recovery – Barney M.

About This Speaker Tape

1977, midnight. Barney M. sits alone in a quiet house while his wife is in Paris. He is hitting five years sober, waiting for a bell to ring or a plaque to appear on the wall. Nothing happens. He realizes he’s been treating sobriety like a 60-yard dash, thinking he could just sprint to a certain milestone and then sit down and relax. He didn't realize he was actually in a marathon.

A former TV anchorman from a gritty Irish Catholic neighborhood in Chicago, Barney describes himself as a "moral leper" who enjoyed sinning. He spent years in intellectual gymnastics, proving the existence of a Higher Power and then debunking it in the same breath. He built a castle of glass and crystal, including a world-class home bar, only to have a judge order him out of his house and leave him broke in an apartment with six children. He entered the rooms thinking he only needed a "six-month plan" to get his stuff back, viewing the program as archaic bullshit for losers.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Barney M. opens with gratitude for the hospitality in Huntsville, AL.
• 6:15 Laughter: Story about Carol M. meeting Lois W. on a flight to Paris.
• 12:40 Barney discusses the 'marathon' of sobriety versus the '60-yard dash'.
• 22:10 Barney describes his childhood in Chicago and his identity as a 'moral leper'.
• 31:45 The 'magic discovery': The difference between the alcoholic and the social drinker.
• 42:20 The wreckage: Divorce, losing the house, and moving into an apartment with six kids.
• 51:10 Barney's first call to AA and his insistence on a 'six-month plan' rather than a day at a time.
• 58:30 Service work: Mopping floors and making coffee as a way to 'empty himself of self'.
• 1:05:15 Identification: Hearing Clancy's talk and finally admitting he has a disease.
• 1:18:40 The process of surrender and the transition from anchorman to reporter.
• 1:26:10 Step 3 and the Higher Power: The 'Our Father' realization 16 years into sobriety.
• 1:35:00 Closing thoughts on the value of newcomers and the importance of participation.