John D. at the 3rd International Convention – 1960

My name is Alan, and I'm an alcoholic. Hi, everybody. May we open this meeting with a moment of silence in grateful meditation on the meaning of our great gift of sobriety. And now if you will join me in reciting the serenity prayer. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change The courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference There may be some here who are not familiar with our tradition of personal anonymity at the public level If so, we respectfully ask that no AA speaker or indeed any AA member be identified by full name in published or broadcast reports of our meetings. The assurance of anonymity is essential in our efforts to help other problem drinkers who may wish to share our recovery program with them. And our tradition of anonymacy reminds us that AA principles come before personality. This meeting concludes the formal part of our great 25th anniversary meeting. Bill's talk last night concluded with a message rededicating AAs everywhere to the basic principles of our fellowship and the delivery of copies of that message to the representatives of foreign countries who came up on the platform and were given copies to take back to their countries. And symbolizing our own country, copies of the message were delivered to the chairman of the host committee on the platform. This was a message of rededication and in a very special sense. This morning's meeting is devoted to our rededication to the spiritual principles upon which this fellowship is based, and who more fittingly could serve as chairman of such a meeting than our co-founder. And so I give you the chairman of this meeting, Bill. Thank you. As we all know, God our Creator is from everlasting to everlasting, and he is timeless. But we who gather here are very sensitive to the passage of time in this brief transit of ours, and to events that mark great turning points in our lives, and in the life of this movement. So we have been gathered here in these three wondrous days, in gratitude, and self-survey and I might add the light touch by saying as the conductor of that self today I caused you to depraise the tradition for about two hours on tape device. It was necessary, I thought since a day like this may never come again to any of us that we set certain things upon the record. And then we came to the rededication of our lives and fortunes to the service of the Father of Light in the pursuit of freedom for ourselves and for all those who come. So it is altogether fitting that we are gathered here this morning in the spirit of Oswald Steck, which suggests—yes, it enjoins us—to try to perfect our conscious contact with dark. Everybody knows that the principles by which we live, the grace on which we daily subsists. Was and still is transmitted to us through the gentlemen of the cross, through their predecessors going back to Moses and the cross. So, it is a wonderful thing to feel that we can be led in this effort to reach a more conscious and loving contact with our Creator by such two dear friends as we have sitting here. One, a very old one. One who is utterly vital to our beginning. Another, a more recent one but following on in this tradition of loving help to and association with us. We talk about the language of the heart, and this is often best transmitted in silence. And certainly after what transpired last night, I think silence is my best way of completing my transmission. But before presenting each of our dear friends, I bid you not farewell, but au revoir. And may Providence so design it that I may still meet many of you as we trudge to the pathway to whatever destiny God has in store for us today. So no farewells, but au revoir. And I think Lloyd would like to just do that too. Oh, please don't. Please don't, Bob. Thank you very much. And thank you for all your love. Bill and I are a heart for Paul. We can't say any more than thank you and au revoir also. Thank you. The next speaker, in commonplace language, is the Right Reverend and Senior John J. Dorothy, President of Seton College. He operates under this name and style. I am very glad to say that from his church, and it's men, of the cloth, one in particular, that darling, that saint, Ed Dowling, he who said, if I ever get to heaven, it will be backing away from hell. this was at St. Louis. We hope he'll be here, and I have a notion that he's probably swinging a leg off this table now and saying it ain't as swell. Yes, uh, I live closer to that man as a spiritual advisor than any other person in the world. It has been a great privilege. and now comes somebody who is very dear to an ever growing circle down there in Jersey the extent of his love his guidance even now I suppose only God knows for us today. He is beloved, he is cherished, and so we'll now get down to his right name and say, Father John, lead us. Thank you, Bill. My dear friend. A few years ago, I used to tell a story very often. I told it about myself. I guess it's part of my case history. I told that when I studied in Rome and when I came home that the pastor, being very proud of his young parishioner, asked me if I would give a talk. I was very flattered with the invitation and excited looking forward to the event. And so I prepared very diligently the talk and when I was getting it ready I thought I should pick something rather apt to begin with. And soI chose the line since I'd been away from home for some years I chose the lines from the story of the prodigal son. and I will rise and go home to my father. And so I chose that as my text and wrote out my talk and memorized it, and when the day came and all the neighbors came to see what this bright young man could do, I mounted the pulpit with some trepidation. And I gripped it very firmly and said in the best voice I could summon, I will arise and go back to my mother. I will go home for my father." I couldn't think of the next line And so gripping the pulpit more firmly I said more loudly I will rise and go home to my father But I wasn't going anywhere And I decided that this was terrible And so I turned and walked down the steps of the pulpet and the pastor was behind the pulpit there in his place and as I passed, he motioned with his finger to me and I went over and down over his shoulder and he said, John, he said when you get home remember me as the old man. You know, I told that story so often I was afraid it might have got to California but apparently, well maybe it did maybe it didn't, I don't know but I'll come back to the prodigal son later on but now I'm going to spend two minutes with you and I'll tell you what I'd like to do I think we may say as I said a moment ago use the expression my case history but I was referring it specifically to the topic which is my understanding of God. And I think that each of us has a case history in the understanding of John and I am confirmed in that judgment because I recall that St. Paul said when I was a child, I thought as a child I spoke as achild. When I became a man I left aside the things of a child and I think it is true of every one of us that as a childhood we have a child's understanding of god And then as we grow and have the experience of living in adulthood with its vexaties, its miseries, its heights and depths, sunlight and shadow, all these that I describe figurative language, these things help us to come to the realization that the child's understanding of God is not enough for a man. that a man cannot live, really, a life as a man with a child's understanding of God that he has to substitute for it a man's understanding of God. Now, in order to do this, it's something like the fellowship I think he needs help. I wouldn't suggest at all that to understand God better someone take me and place me on a desert island. Ireland. My speech, Professor, will be abashed at that. That someone placed me solitarily on an island and let me figure the whole thing out for myself. No, it has been really through a fellowship of many that I hope that I've come to something more than a child's understanding of God. And that fellowship is not merely in the present, it's also in the past. It goes way back into the past and these people are not recorded for us as we're being recorded today for others but the great spiritual leaders of the past are recorded in writing and I think now of the writings of the path that have helped me to come to a fuller understanding of God and I would like to just refer to a few of those I think, for example of the lovely lines of the psalmist The heavens declare the glory of God And the plenum announces the work of his hand O'er the other lines of the song What is man that thou art mindful of him? Or the son of man that thou should visit him Thou hast crowned him with honor and glory Thou has made him a little less than the angel It's lines like this, or the other lines of the psalm As the heart panteth for the living waters So does my soul long for thee, O Lord When shall I come and appear before the face of my God? It's that sacred poetry That communicates to us The fact that men centuries ago Centuries and centuries ago had this experience of God, this reaching out for God, this search, this seeking, this striving, this longing, this burning, this yearning. These things my forefathers felt in lands far distant. And these things they expressed and they have come down to me through a chain of many tongues into my own tongue. And one of the great privileges of my work has been to be able to go back through tongues and to read those poets, those inspired poets in their own tongues, the Hebrew language. And so we owe much to the fellowship of spiritual men for the centuries who have brought to us something of the realization of God. And the thing that emerges as we delve into these men of the past and if we delve further into human experience and our own experience of ourselves is that really God is beyond understanding. That the creature gets a glimpse of the creator here. Only a glimpse. As Paul put it, we see him purely as in a mirror and he was thinking of the old bronze mirrors they used that became tarnished, and you saw yourself only dimly in that mirror. And so it is our vision of God. And so I say this to your encouragement. Do not be too anxious if your vision of God is not something like the bright light from the brilliance of this day. All you need is enough of the vision of God that your faith will supply. They say that God is life, and if you get enough of his light into you, enough light to walk by apparently he feels that's enough for now but if you go following speaking in this life there'll be more for another time when you need more so i think it's part of the mystery of god that he reveals himself so slowly and sometimes that you must see him from the flat of your face to a dark night of despair. And somewhere far up above you, there seems to be a candle. And that's your hope, that your help is up there. So do not be impatient with yourself, but keep on seeking, keep on searching, keep on longing that you may shun to a full understanding of God, that you might leave behind the things of a child and move ahead to the things of a man in terms of understanding God. And so I say the thing that enrages from this reflection and delving into men of the past is that God is mystery. And when you reflect for a moment on that, you'll think it should be so. It should be So, if God's world is so mysterious, certainly his makeup must be more mysterious. Take, for example, certainly there is much of me that reveals itself in your eyes. The expression in your eye is the joy I've seen in so many eyes during these days. The radiance, the enthusiasm, the love. The eyes mirror this, and so they are a reflection of the spirit that's within you. But the eye, the wonder of it. The wonder of seeing. To look up and behold this space so masterfully colored by God. To look about us in this country decked with flowers. And to see and to breathe his love within the rose and all the flowers. These things are wonders that God has made. The human eye is a wonder in itself, the ear that hears, the heart that beats, the brain that speaks. We know something about these things, but the mechanisms of the brain is still a mystery to be explored by medicine, and if this be mysterious, should not the maker be mysterious? This great, beyond human, treated comprehension, should he not be mystery? And if it's too simplified, may you not suspect that this is really not an image of God, but some little man-made image in words or in colors on a canvas. No doubt all of us thought of God as children, as an old man with a gray beard. Later on, we come to realize that gray beards are a sign of age, and age is the closest thing that we can use and get to eternity. And therefore, we use that as a symbol of eternity. But if God is not old, God is eternal. It has nothing to do with age. And so we come and disabuse ourselves of these childish notions and move into this sense of mystery of God. and all about us this world proclaims that he is majestic and mysterious and beyond our comprehension. And yet, we know more than that about him. We go back to some of these great spiritual leaders of the past who realized another thing about God as they understood him. I think, and it's very impressive to me every time I read it again and again is the vision of Isaiah in chapter 6 when he said I beheld God and beheld the Lord his majesty filled the temple the angels covered their faces with their wings and they repeated without keeping holy holy holy Lord God of hosts all heaven and earth is full of thy glory and he said I am a man of unclean lips and I speak to a people with unclean lips woe is me and one of the angels flew to the altar of incense and took from the altar a burning coal and touched his lips in the vision and cleansed his lips with the burning coal and then the voice of the Lord was heard to say whom shall I send and Isaiah rose to his full stature and said Here I am. Send me. Once he realized that something of the holiness of God had been transferred to him, something of cleanliness of God by the burning coal, he was ready to accept the mission of God. But the lines I want to emphasize are those words, Holy, holy, holy Lord God of hosts, for this is a revelation of God, the holiness from God. now we know the word holiness we use it so much but do we know the meaning of the word on the lips of Isaiah the Hebrew kadosh kadosh kadosh for Isaiah that word meant God was beyond beyond the propane beyond the shabbiness the spoiled earth. And the word we use is transcendent, the transcendence of God. And for that time and that place, this manifestation of God as transcendent was a majestic revelation to the great prophetic figure of Jerusalem. And so we owe so much to so many through the centuries in the revelation of God, God as they understood him and helped us to understand him And so, part of the fellowship, and I think particularly our part in it, is to share with you whatever God has given us through his many, many spiritual figures through the centuries in our understanding because we can give our time and our study to the effort to understand God better. And so the revelation of God came to his great inspired poet, his great inspiring prophet. but it came through his poets. Through the times, and of course this saintly poet took as the one I love so dearly St. Francis of Assisi. I've been there many times and loved to walk down its streets. They're so much like the streets when he walked down them. To look up over the Umbrian Valley and to stand on a little balcony where he composed his hymn to the sun, beginning in that lovely, beautiful, early Italian language. His praise to God when he asked the sun or mother, the rain, to bless and praise God. The water so abundant, so pure, So jockin', so strong, praise the Lord. And then he ends that so beautifully, and serves him all, serves him with great humility. And I feel that you have a great understanding of that last line, serve him with grace, humility, for humility brought you into AA. Humility has kept you in AA. You grow in humility through the fellowship of AA. you leave the things of a child and one of the great things of the child is that he's proud and you leave it and cling to humility so please serve him in great humility and you will come to understand him better and so on we come through and through so many great spiritual figures great minds great hearts and have revealed God to us so that we've come to see him better. And I would like to finish with the greatest, the man from Nazareth. And I will I would like to choose a few aspects of his revelation which I think are most meaningful to you in your effort to understand God better. I've often quoted today a meeting one of the lines of Jesus, which I think are very meaningful to you. Are not whose sparrows sold for a farthing? And yet not one of them falls to the ground without my father's knowledge. How much more worth are you than many sparrrows? The very hairs of your head are numbered. This is a controlling revelation. I recall one time in an AA talk, I chose three symbols to bring out three ideas and the first symbol I chose was the hair of your head. A hair of you head. And the hair on your head The hair of the head I chose as a symbol to bring me into this encouraging line of Jesus that I've just repeated for you are you of not much more worth than many, many, many stars. The very hairs of your hair are not. Isn't it consoling to hear from the lips of a man? Isn't there consoling for you to hear it? Who may have at one moment in the past thought of yourselves are certainly worthless. But only the hairs of your head but your old beak was without worth and you had been dropped from the human family. There are other revelations other words that are most consoling I think and one of them certainly is the word that you say at the close of each meeting our Father who art in heaven. Other words that are encouraging are words of disciples of Jesus and one I think you'll understand is this I have said that God is mystery God is holiness God is majesty God is transcendence but I think it's more encouraging for you to hear what John wrote, God is love and he that abides in love abides in God and God in him. And as we meet here together your friends in the clergy, what do we say to one another? We say where have you seen such love? So you know the understanding of love, and in a very eminent degree, let me assure you. And understanding love as you understand it, I think you can understand God better through it. For God is love. Let me return to the word, our Father. And that you might understand better the meaning of that word father as Jesus used it. He said there was a man who had two sons, and one asked his father for his inheritance and went off and wasted it until he was penniless. And it was a shame to go home. Finally when he found himself when the pig started, he said alcohol. And he started home. And the line I want you to notice especially is this, that the father taught him a long way off and he came to meet him. And I'd like to point out that if the father saw him a long way off on that day, he saw, he did not see him for many days before for every day he looked. And so for every day of your drinking experience, God has looked and finally one day he saw you a long way off, and he came. And he put a ring, as that father in the parable put a ring on his finger, and fine garments on his back, and food on his table, and made a feast for his return. And when his brother complained that his father had not shown him such attention, the father said, you I have always. But he who was lost his pounds, and he who was dead has come to life. And you can understand that story of the prodigal son, can't you? And if God has given you good things, perhaps I mean the good things of faith and hope and love and humility and sobriety, and the things you've come to know in this fellowship, if he hath given you these things. Perhaps by meditating upon the gifts he has given you, you will come to a greater understanding of him who hath forgiven them. For he is the giver of all good gifts, and could not be otherwise, because God is love. Transcription by CastingWords