Fighting Fires for 24 Hours and Drinking Like a Pig for 48 – Jim M.
About This Speaker Tape
Jim M. shares his story at the Central Orlando Saturday Night Speaker meeting in July 2014, with a sobriety date of August 14, 2005. Born in 1954 in Orlando, he grew up in Narcoossee and Azalea Park with a solid family — his father was a civil service firefighter at the Air Force base, his mother a stay-at-home mom. Despite a good upbringing, Jim always felt apart from others and compensated through lying, stealing, and cheating. At thirteen he discovered his parents' liquor cabinet, liked the effect immediately, and never looked back.
Jim followed his father into fire service, joining Lake Barton Fire Control District in 1974. He loved the career but drank relentlessly on his 48 hours off — cursing drunk drivers on shift, then doing the same thing the next night. After his second DUI the department gave him an ultimatum: retire with benefits or get fired without them. He moved into stagehand union work, then took a job as a surgical orderly at Orlando General Hospital, where coworkers staged an intervention. He completed a 28-day rehab at Care Unit in Lake Mary, stayed sober nine months, then relapsed on New Year's and drank for roughly fifteen more years.
Through the late nineties and early 2000s Jim's drinking became around-the-clock — starting each morning with half vodka, half grapefruit juice. He racked up a third DUI, lost his driver's license repeatedly, and watched 9/11 unfold at the Marriott World Center while working a dental convention, an event that hit him hard as a former firefighter and intensified his drinking. In 2004 he suffered two alcohol-related seizures within months; both times he went straight from the ER to the bar. Bedridden with gout during the 2004 hurricanes, he could barely crutch to the kitchen to refill his vodka jug.
A former girlfriend arranged a twelve-step call in February 2005, and after a few more months of struggle Jim picked up a white chip on August 14, 2005. He threw himself into the ninety-in-ninety, spending full days at AA clubhouses — Blue Bottoms in the morning, Crossroads in the afternoon — then riding the bus home to his parents' house. He worked the steps with his sponsor Ernie, fighting every inch but staying sober. He eventually found his home at the Central Orlando noon meeting, where the diversity of the group kept him engaged. At nine years sober, Jim credits AA with giving him a life, noting he has never found a reason sufficient enough to pick up a drink again.
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Full Transcript
One or two minutes for briefly qualified requirements for chairing a meeting of Central Saturday night speakers meeting is one year continuous sobriety, have Central as your home group, and attend a group conscience meeting.
My name is Derek and I...
My name is Derek and I...
One or two minutes for briefly qualified requirements for chairing a meeting of Central Saturday night speakers meeting is one year continuous sobriety, have Central as your home group, and attend a group conscience meeting.
My name is Derek and I am an alcoholic.
Derek.
By the grace of God, I'm going on 2.8 years.
One day at a time.
So, there have been a rough 2.8 years, but before that I was in relapse mode for like 22 months and it was rough getting back.
I went to like four or five treatment centers and couldn't get past 90 days, you know.
But when I got to Central, I wasn't in a treatment facility, I wasn't locked down, I was free to come and go, but I stayed sober, go figure.
I'm glad to have, you know, this is my home group.
There's a great bunch of people.
I'm really glad to be here.
Thank you very much.
The group is asking me to remind you to please make sure your phones are off and refrain from moving around and talking while the speaker is sharing.
Our speaker tonight is Jim Maynard.
I've known Jim for a couple of years.
And whenever he shares, it always has something that gives you like a moment of clarity.
You know, it makes you think.
It's something that sets inside you that you can keep with you.
And I got to tell you, honestly, with that long hair, I thought he was like the coolest shit in the world.
You know what I'm saying?
I'm like, damn, how can he have such long hair and be so smart?
You know what I mean?
So knowledgeable of AA, right?
He looks like, you know, he looks like, you know, give me a joint and a beer and I'm cool.
But by the grace of God, he's going to AA.
He is.
Let me let y'all have our speaker, Jim Maynard.
Well, if I got you bullshitted.
I'm an alcoholic.
My name is Jim Maynard.
My sobriety dates August 14th, 2005.
I'd like to read some, start us off with a little prayer.
Because I need it.
This is a seven-step prayer.
My creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad.
I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.
Grant me strength as I go out from here to do your bidding.
Amen.
I just got one question for y'all.
Didn't you have anything better to do tonight?
I'm glad y'all are here.
I'm going to start things off a little bit about myself.
January 20th, 1954, I was born in a little hospital right around the corner and down the street.
Back in those days, it was called Orange Memorial Hospital.
Now it's a big, huge U of F medical center.
My parents, at the time of my birth, lived out in Narcoossee, which is now Lake Nona.
I prefer Narcoossee.
My dad was civil service.
My mom was a stay-at-home mother.
I have a brother and two sisters.
I'm a middle child.
I'm the second to the oldest.
My dad was civil service, like I said.
He was assistant chief in charge of crash rescue training at the Air Force Base.
He taught all the firefighting skills to the airmen and whoever else wanted to learn.
He learned those skills at the time.
He went all over the U.S.
He was out at Edwards.
He went to Edwards Air Force Base.
He went up to Pratt Whitney.
I believe it's Ohio.
He went all over the place to a bunch of different facilities to train and teach.
He was a good man, a very good man, my hero.
Anyway, we lived out there in Narcoossee in the woods.
Out there, things were kind of laxed.
The kids ran around in their underwear in the summertime and went down to the lake,
went swimming and fishing and just out there stomping around in the woods and stuff,
having a good time.
I remember my mom telling a story about throwing us in the back of the station wagon
and going down to the store.
Of course, we were in our underwear as kids.
By the time we got to the store, my underwear was out the window,
and I'm standing there in the back.
I'm like two years old, feeling the wind.
We get to the store, and it's like, okay, what do we do with little Jimmy?
Anyway, I was privileged to have the family life that I did.
I had a good family, a good mom, good dad, had everything I needed.
Some things I wanted, but mostly I had everything I needed.
Always had food.
Always had clothing, whether I wore it or not.
Just a good growing up atmosphere.
We were good church people, Catholic church people.
But through the years, after we lived out there for a while,
my dad got transferred up here to Orlando Air Force Base,
which was later on the Naval Training Center.
So they decided.
They decided to buy a house in Azalea Park.
This was in the mid to late 60s, or 50s, excuse me.
And so I grew up in Azalea Park, which is on the east side of town now.
And there again, back in those days, things were really cool, really laid back.
I mean, it was like a great place to grow up, a great place to live.
I had a lot of friends.
I had a lot of friends.
We had to swim and pool down the street.
Just, you know, riding bikes, skateboards, going out in the woods,
and just having a great time, you know, great childhood.
But there was something different about me.
I always felt that I just wasn't a part of, you know.
So to become a part of, you know, I was a liar.
I was a thief.
And I was a cheat to become a part of.
So I felt like I was being accepted by my group, you know.
I always had to have something a little bit better.
I embellished, let's say.
I was the great embellisher.
But, you know, as things went on, you know, it got worse.
It got worse.
I got into a lot of trouble, even before I started drinking with my lying and thieving and cheating.
In school, I got caught cheating many, many times.
I got caught lying and stealing and lying about.
I got caught the stealing until things just snowballed and snowballed and snowballed,
and I couldn't get my way out of it because I couldn't remember the original lie, you know.
It was something else.
Long about 13 years old, I discovered my mom and dad's alcohol
because they had their little stash of alcohol for Sunday or that drink before dinner, you know.
And I knew that if I could take a couple of shots of that, I'd be all right.
Well, I started doing that.
And, well, actually, the first time I did that, I got drunk.
This is about 13 years old.
So I'm a liar, a thief, and a cheat, and then I added alcohol to it.
And I liked the effects immediately.
I liked the effects produced by alcohol.
And I would sneak.
I'd do the old thing of filling the bottle back up with water.
So it was at the original mark, thinking, well, they know, you know.
They know where their alcohol level is.
But I wouldn't think I was out thinking them.
But obviously they knew there was something wrong because I was really different.
I was really different.
Went to Catholic schools, you know.
Went to Good Shepherd in grade school.
Then I went to Bishop Moore, Bishop Moore High School up there on Edgewater and Parr.
And, you know, a lot of kids got sent to Bishop Moore.
They were troubled kids.
So when they sent their troubled kids to that Catholic school,
it just meant there was a Catholic school full of troubled kids.
And let me tell you, back in the late 60s, early 70s, there was a lot of drugs.
There was a lot of promiscuity going on.
A lot of girls never graduated because they got pregnant.
A lot of stuff like that going on.
I had nothing to do with it.
But, you know, I mean, I enjoyed my grade school and high school years
because I got some good friends, some good friendships out of it.
You know, a lot of guys that I know today that I'm still friends with today
were high school and grade school chums.
A couple of them are in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous.
So that, to me, is truly a godsend.
You know?
High school, I did a lot of experimenting.
I did a lot of experimenting.
I did a lot of experimenting with other substances.
I heard that alcohol is like lighter fluid.
It starts the fire.
And for me, that's true because, you know, we'd go out to a party and it's like,
hey.
I got this new stuff called mescaline.
Or I got this new stuff, orange sunshine.
Or whatever, you know.
And it's like, here, let me try it.
And I had to try everything at least once or twice to see if I liked it.
And I usually liked it.
Got introduced to a whole lot of different things back in those days.
And I liked them all.
I wanted more and more and more of all of it because it made me feel like I was a part of,
you know, instead of apart from.
And like I said, high school was cool.
It was a lot of parties, a lot of going to the beach and partying.
We had a place down here at Paramore and Gore, the ABC, that we could go and get liquor.
Friday nights, we'd go and we'd hit that thing.
There'd be about eight or ten of us.
We'd hit that place and we'd have enough to last the weekend.
Hung out with a lot of guys from out there in Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar was like the wealthier part of Azalea Park and the east side back in those days.
They used to have a professional golf tournament.
The Citrus opened there all the time.
So we had all these professional golfers here in town at the time.
And that was a big party, too.
But we were never without.
That's for sure.
Never without.
But in Azalea Park where I lived, I knew of...
At least three or four guys that I could go at any given time and get a bag of dope.
They always had it.
All you had to have was the money for it.
In a $20 bag, four-finger, okay?
You know, that's all part of it.
You know, it's all part of my story is the extracurricular activities.
You know, my generation's been called the television generation.
As a kid growing up,
you know, I could watch presidents being inaugurated and assassinated.
I could watch war on TV every night sitting down to dinner.
The Vietnam War was right there in living color.
It's not why I drank or why, you know, any of that, but it's part of my story.
After high school, I graduated from Bishamore by the skin of my teeth,
as so I was told by a few of my teachers.
Got out of it.
And I thought, well, hell, what am I going to do with my life?
And I looked at my dad, and I thought, huh, fire service.
My dad's done pretty good.
Let me try my hand at it.
So I got hired on by Lake Barton Fire Control District,
which is there at 436 and 50.
It's Station 66, Orange County now.
And started that career in 74.
Graduated from high school in 73.
In the middle of 74, I got hired on there.
Loved it.
I loved it.
That was my passion in those days.
A young guy on top of the world, single.
You go to a bar and tell a chick that you're a firefighter,
she was in, I mean, it was like she was all over you.
But it was like, you know, it was really cool.
I enjoyed the hell out of it.
I loved the life, you know.
24 hours on, 48 hours off.
So for 24 hours, I was fighting fire and saving lives.
And for 48 hours, I was drinking like a pig.
You know, I mean, those were my 48 hours to do with whatever I wanted.
Usually it was whatever I wanted.
And I was out there amongst them.
It's funny.
The 24 hours I was on, if we got a wreck in the middle of the night or whatever,
and it was an alcohol-involved accident,
I was cursing that son of a bitch up left and right for waking me up and causing this problem.
But then the next day, I'd be off, and I'd be right there doing the same thing he was doing.
Such a hypocrite.
But I loved the career.
I loved the fellowship.
It was really a brotherhood.
Thank you.
I stayed in the fire department for a few years.
I retired from Orange County.
I retired from Orange County because I was given an ultimatum.
Either get fired without a retirement or retire with a retirement.
I got my second DUI while I was in the fire department, and they frowned upon that.
Well, anyway, this was in the middle of the 80s.
I got my first DUI in 74.
My second one in 83 or 84.
I can't remember now.
That doesn't matter.
I got it.
Still didn't learn, you know.
Well, I was doing what I do now part-time through the fire department.
Well, I was with the fire department.
That's working through the stagehands union.
And I'm still doing that.
It's been 20-some years, but, you know, with that type of work,
it's just...
It used to be a big party.
Things have really gotten tight there now.
I mean, there's a lot of drug testing and stuff like that going on.
So I'm okay with that.
But, you know, I drank like there was no tomorrow.
I partied hard those days that I was off duty.
I was married, lost that due to my drinking.
My wife got pregnant.
Like, the third year we were married,
and I believe I was the cause of her miscarriage.
We got into a big...
Never got physical, but it was a big, huge fight.
And it doesn't have to get physical for a woman to miscarry.
But...
I enjoyed it to the point where, like I said,
they asked me to retire.
So I did.
Got out of that, but once it's in your blood,
you can't, you know, you can't get a transfusion and it's gone.
I still feel it in the back of my neck
every time an engine or a tower drives by
with red lights and sirens going.
But anyway, I went on to become...
to working in the stagehands union.
So...
So...
So...
This was, let's see,
late 80s, early 90s.
I decided to take a break from that
and pursue a different career.
I went to work at Orlando General Hospital,
which is Florida East, I believe now.
And I went to work, believe it or not,
as an orderly in surgery.
I wanted to get back into the medical field.
So because I was an EMT in the fire department,
I figured maybe I would try my luck at nursing
or something along those lines.
I worked there for about...
about a year and a half, almost two years.
But while I was working there,
they did an intervention on me
because of my drinking
and my actions.
They had a little meeting.
I came in to check in.
I came in, punched the clock.
Went into the little room,
changed into my scrubs.
The head nurse came in and she goes,
Hey, Jimmy, can you step into my office here?
Okay, all right.
Went in there and everybody's there.
I mean, everybody that I worked with,
I don't know if you've seen that on TV,
but everybody's there.
And it's like they say,
Well, you know,
we got another ultimatum for you.
You can either go to a 28-day rehab
or you can pick up your last paycheck.
Ain't no dummy.
I went to the 28-day rehab thinking,
Okay, you know, I do have to do something.
I got to do something if it's getting to this point.
Well, I went up to the 28-day rehab.
It was up in Lake Mary,
a place called Care Unit.
And boy, did I have them bullshitted.
I really did because
I went in there with
with every intention of
beating their system.
And I got out 28 days later.
I mean, I was elected like the head drunk.
You know, I was like the liaison
between the people running it and the crew.
So, I mean, if there was anybody there
that had a problem,
I was like in the office.
I was the go-between.
I was elected by the group.
You know, they thought that I had my shit together
and I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I thought that, you know,
I could do this for them.
But there again, I had other ideas.
And that was to get out.
You know, I did get a belly
or a mind full of AA.
I did.
I got out and I stayed sober
for about nine months.
And figured I got it.
I don't need this.
It was New Year's
a year later.
met a girl
started drinking
and
I stayed drunk for 20 years
stayed drunk for
well I don't know
this was early 90's till 2005
I stayed drunk for a long time
my drinking
I could hide it
but then again I couldn't
because my mom and dad could see right through me
I thought I was doing well
I thought I was one of those guys
in the book it talks about
if he can go out and do some responsible drinking
we'll take our hats off to him
you know and say hey
you have our blessing
but you know I could go
sometimes I could go to the bar and drink one or two drinks
and then go home
other times it was go to the bar
drink two or three or four drinks
go home and fix it the way I wanted to
but
that's the way it started
after I'd been in rehab
I always had that thought though
in my mind
I always had AA in my mind
things just progressed
and progressed
and progressed
got to the point where
I was starting my days
with a big old glass
half vodka
half grapefruit
or cranberry
and then going to work
going to do my stagehand thing
because I lost the job at the hospital
so I went back to doing stage work
and this was back in the mid 80s
early 90s
or early 90s
late 90s
into the late 90s
and it was the norm
I mean we'd go to lunch
and eat a couple of chicken wings
and have two pitchers of beer
you know
and be smoking joints the whole day
so we stayed under the influence 24-7
I had alcohol coursing through my veins
24-7
didn't stop me
I just
I couldn't stop
let's see
like about
I got my third DUI
in the mid 90s
and all this time
I never had a driver's license
so I'd been popped periodically
for driving on a suspended license
I mean
I don't know how many times
I got picked up for that
I remember the judge saying one time
if I see you again
it's going to be
it's going to go down as habitual
luckily I think he retired
but
it's like
you know
I mean
it didn't stop me
that kind of stuff didn't stop me
got my third DUI
my dad
who was getting on in years
had just bought a brand new truck
this is a new one
1999
just bought a brand new truck
and I said wow man
I really like
dad you got good taste
always did
a few years later
he got to the point where
his health was failing
and he goes
I'm going to be getting rid of my truck
do you think you can
take it
do you think you can
get this truck
I said well
I'd like to
let me do
see what
I'm still drinking
I had no intention
of ever getting my driver's license back
but
this was intuitive
this was
this was
this was something I wanted
was my dad's truck
so
I did some investigating
and I found out
that I could get
my driver's license back
I just had to
you know
do the boogie woogie
that the state wanted me to
so I did
I had to go to
AA meetings
I had to go to
counseling
had to go through
the safety council
had to spend money
hand over fist
but I did
because that was something
that I really wanted
I ended up
I ended up
getting my license back
which was
a miracle in itself
because I thought
I would never
ever be able to
still drinking
still drinking
this is
2000
yeah right around
the year 2000
okay
I
I stayed drunk
pretty much all the time
like I said
it was coursing through my veins
24-7
I bet you
any given time
if I had to drop a urine
or take blood
they would find more alcohol
than blood in my streams
but
you know
that's the way I was living
that's the way I was existing
I wouldn't really call it living
September 11, 2001
hit me hard
still hits me hard
when that day occurred
when that day happened
I was at work
I was at the Marriott World
out there off of
World Trade
and
they immediately put
all these big screen TVs up
so we could watch
we had an international
dental instrument show
going on
all flights stopped
there was no aircraft
anywhere
this show just
basically
stopped itself
I mean there was nothing
we could do about it
but to stand there
and sit there
in the lobby
and watch
those towers come down
was just
unbelievable
and knowing that
Brother Firefighters
were going up
those stairs
so
like I said
that hit me hard
that hit me hard
that hit me real hard
it probably intensified
my alcohol abuse
immense
it did
it did really
I was drinking a whole lot then
as a matter of fact
the woman
that I was living with
at the time
she goes like
she was an alcoholic also
still is
she goes
I can't live with you
you're going crazy
and I said
well
the hell out
I was like
at work
I had my first seizure
that was about
2000
2004
had my first
alcohol related seizure
woke up in the ER
people looking at me like
and I'm looking at them like
what the hell happened
you know
the doctor said
you need to slow down
you need to quit
I said okay
when do I get out of here
they said
well
you know
we can sign you out
we can sign you out right now
I went immediately to the bar
after having my first
alcohol related seizure
about
three months later
I had my second
alcohol related seizure
same scenario
ER
same ER
they gave me
I forget what the hell
medication they gave me
but
but
it was some kind of
anti-seizure
kind of thing
I don't know
but
again
as soon as I got released
I went back to the bar
went right back
that's what I did
that was what I did
a few months later
well
through this
through this period of drinking
and abusing myself
I acquired gout
if anybody in here
has ever had gout
then they'll know
what I'm talking about
it is the
most single
painful
affliction
you can ever have
for this drunk anyway
well anyway
I'm stuck on a couch
with both knees swollen
both ankles swollen
both toes
you know
great toes
swollen
I couldn't hardly move
but I could
crutch it in
to get some ice
I could crutch it in
to get some ice
and fill that big old jug
up with vodka
and then crutch it back out
and camp there
on the couch
I was like
the 2004 hurricanes
when they came through here
heard the roof
going off my house
I couldn't do nothing
but make it into the kitchen
and put more ice in my jug
turns out that
the girl that I had
tossed out
of my life
still had enough
enough
she cared about me enough
to get a hold of a guy
that I worked with
who's in AA
and they came and did a job
and they put a 12 step on me
this was about
February
February 2005
I said yeah
come on let's go
I need this
I need this bad
well you know
I'm going to tell you right now
I didn't stay sober
I went to meetings
but I always came back
and I always had a stash
ended up losing that
house where I was living
duplex where I was living
and having to put everything in storage
and moving back in with mom and dad
I basically was in dry
I was dry from about
ok
from July to August
came back into the rooms
and I picked up a white chip
August 14th
so that's basically my sobriety date
when I was dry
when I was enthused
and I was still crazy
August 14th
2005
I was lucky enough
to be off
work
and I was able to do
the proposed 90 and 90
the first 90 days
I went to meetings
all day
every day
I would start off
at the Blue Bottoms meeting
down south Orlando
where I met Terry Lamont
and that guy
Peggy Purser
and the whole
I mean Bobo Lewis
all those good old drunks
and I loved them to death
every single one of them
they got me sober
went from there
to the south side
the Crossroads group
spent the afternoon there
then rode the bus home
so I lived
in an AA clubhouse
during the day
and then went home to mom and dad's
where it was strict
it was strict
strict stuff
but that's what I needed
I needed that
that structure
you know
started doing a lot of reading
my sponsor at the time
George Ballou
he was
it's like you come into the rooms
you start your steps
and we started doing the steps
like that week
never finished them with him
but we started them
and I got a good sponsor
after I had George
and I got a good sponsor
and we did finish them
but
it's like
while I'm living there
I'm getting stronger
both
spiritually
with
you know
what's going on with AA
in my life
and
and I'm ready to go
I'm ready to get back
into the swing of things
so with the help of my mom and dad
I
got this little apartment
right around the corner
from where they lived
my dad's health is failing
you know
this whole time
he's on oxygen
and
just not getting around
like he used to
hell he's 92 years old
you know
but
their lifelong dream
was to move into
Orlando Lutheran Towers
so when I moved out
that was their cue
to move in there
and that was where
my mom and dad
just found it
they found the happiest place
on the earth
that they could
and
and
my mom's still there
my dad's passed
but it was like
you know
that's
that's exactly what my dad wanted
he worked all his life
for
for that
and my mom
and him
were just
right where God wanted them
so
you know
this is
I've been in the same place
the same apartment now
since then
since 2005
and a half
2006
you know
Alcoholics Anonymous
I used to go to
Siscoff
I mean
when I was forced
to come here
and
you know
with the DUIs
and
I didn't want it
I didn't want anything
to do with you losers
you know
but I was the biggest loser
out there
I can remember
the last time
that I was forced to go
to AA
I would sit out
in the parking lot
down there at Crossroads
and I'd wait
until the last person
which I thought
would be the last person
going in the door
so I'd wait
so I could sneak in
and just sit at the seat
that was next to
the door
and
you know
when you open the door
and walk in
everybody's going to
turn around
and look at you
right
how was I to know
there was two or three people
that I worked with in there
so it was like
okay
alright
but like I was going to say
you know
Alcoholics Anonymous
most definitely
has saved my life
you know
Ernie my
my good friend
and sponsor
from down there
at Southside
we went through the steps
and I went through the steps
fighting
every inch
he says
well you got to do this
if you don't want to drink
you got to do this
if you want to stay sober
I said well I want to stay sober
but I don't want to do this
which is you know
fighting tooth and nail
I don't know how long
it took for me
to go through the steps
with him
but it was quite some time
I got to a point
where I got complacent
down there
and it was a small group
and I could hear
the same thing
from every person
every night
and it just got old
and I knew it was me
it wasn't them
it was me
so I made
in sobriety
a geographical change
from Southside
to Central
and let me tell you what
this group
this clubhouse
is so diversified
this is what I needed
this is what I needed
I needed to have
a group
all the different types
of people here
you know
to keep me interested
to keep me wanting
you know
we're told
that we have to come
we have to keep coming back
to AA meetings
as long as we
you know
need to
until we want to
and when we want to
it's like
it's a given
and I want to come
to meetings now
I love coming to meetings
because this is where
I learn how to live life
on life's terms
from you people
and my home group
is the noon meeting
that is my home group
those are my peeps
my tribe
whatever
but it doesn't matter
I'll make
if I'm not working
I'll make two or three meetings a day
and they're all down right here
I've been known to start
at the 6.30 meeting
and work my way up
but it's been a while
but you know
there's no way
I can ever
repay Alcoholics Anonymous
what I've been given
and I'm not going to
you know
I still
I still have those
life on life's terms
I still get thrown curves
my dad passed in sobriety
you know
I had another fight
with the state of Florida
over my driver's license
14 months
that I was without
a driver's license
in sobriety
you know
I just haven't found
a reason to drink
you know
I just haven't found
a sufficient enough
reason for me
to pick up a drink
or a drug
and I'm not going to
have any sense
you know
and I owe it all
to my higher power
to
good orderly direction
from a group of drunks
however you want to put it
you know
this is
I mean
I wouldn't have a life
if it wasn't for these rooms
my mom gets to
come to one meeting
a year
my anniversary
is going to be next month
August
and she gets to come
to the
birthday meeting
at the end of the month
and she looks forward
to that every year
she wanted to come
and listen to me tonight
and I said
no I don't think so
I love you
but no I don't think so
but you know
that's just it
she goes
she said to me
a few years ago
she goes
can I make a donation
to AA
I said
what are you talking about
she goes
I'd like to write him a check
I said well
you know
it's not a big deal
it's kind of frowned upon
you know
I mean
we stay
we stay
functioning
through our own contributions
you know
if you were to do
something like that
you might start a trend
where everybody
would want to donate
to AA
and it would just get to be
too much
you know
it's like the old days
they wanted to start
AA Bill
and those guys
wanted to start
their own AA hospitals
and stuff
and it just doesn't work
that way
all I know
is that
uh
you know
when Ebby and Bill
were sitting around
that kitchen table
many many years ago
and Bob pushed that bottle
over to Ebby
and said
here have a snort
and Ebby said
no I found religion
I think that's what
sparked Bill
that's what sparked Bill
on this whole
spirituality thing
and I'm grateful for Ebby
for doing that
even though
Ebby died a drunk
he didn't stay sober
but Bill and Bob did
um
and I'm grateful
okay I'm done
but uh
this
this program
if you're new
or you're coming back
it's like my old
uh
friend
uh
um
Terry Lamont said
stick around
there's a miracle
with your name on it
and to close things up
I'd like to read something
out of the big book
of Alcoholics Anonymous
abandon yourself to God
as you understand God
omit your faults to him
and to your fellows
clear away the wreckage
of your past
give freely of what you find
and join us
we shall be with you
in the fellowship of the spirit
and you will surely meet
some of us
as you trudge
as you trudge the road
of happy destiny
may God bless you
and keep you until then
thank you
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
applause
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
here at Central Orlando group
and other groups around
Central Florida
and all of Florida
we celebrate
continuous links of sobriety
with chips
and I have
he told me
but I forgot
I hope it's Bradley
he told me
Hey Chips
here at Central
as he said
we designate sobriety
with colorful chips
we start off with a year
does anyone have a birthday today?
what do we say?
we need a birthday
alright we got nine months
colorful purple
anyone picking up
a nine month chip today?
pregnancies count
keep them back
alright six months
red chips
six months
anybody?
alright what do we say?
we got a birthday
alright next is 90 days
green
90 days
what do we say?
we got a birthday
alright 30 days
and nights
anyone?
alright what do we say?
we got a birthday
we got a birthday
we got a birthday
alright and the most
important one
white chip
the chip of surrender
desire to stop doing it
you want to join our
way of life today
come on
come on
you guys can do it
My name is Derek and I am an alcoholic.
Derek.
By the grace of God, I'm going on 2.8 years.
One day at a time.
So, there have been a rough 2.8 years, but before that I was in relapse mode for like 22 months and it was rough getting back.
I went to like four or five treatment centers and couldn't get past 90 days, you know.
But when I got to Central, I wasn't in a treatment facility, I wasn't locked down, I was free to come and go, but I stayed sober, go figure.
I'm glad to have, you know, this is my home group.
There's a great bunch of people.
I'm really glad to be here.
Thank you very much.
The group is asking me to remind you to please make sure your phones are off and refrain from moving around and talking while the speaker is sharing.
Our speaker tonight is Jim Maynard.
I've known Jim for a couple of years.
And whenever he shares, it always has something that gives you like a moment of clarity.
You know, it makes you think.
It's something that sets inside you that you can keep with you.
And I got to tell you, honestly, with that long hair, I thought he was like the coolest shit in the world.
You know what I'm saying?
I'm like, damn, how can he have such long hair and be so smart?
You know what I mean?
So knowledgeable of AA, right?
He looks like, you know, he looks like, you know, give me a joint and a beer and I'm cool.
But by the grace of God, he's going to AA.
He is.
Let me let y'all have our speaker, Jim Maynard.
Well, if I got you bullshitted.
I'm an alcoholic.
My name is Jim Maynard.
My sobriety dates August 14th, 2005.
I'd like to read some, start us off with a little prayer.
Because I need it.
This is a seven-step prayer.
My creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad.
I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.
Grant me strength as I go out from here to do your bidding.
Amen.
I just got one question for y'all.
Didn't you have anything better to do tonight?
I'm glad y'all are here.
I'm going to start things off a little bit about myself.
January 20th, 1954, I was born in a little hospital right around the corner and down the street.
Back in those days, it was called Orange Memorial Hospital.
Now it's a big, huge U of F medical center.
My parents, at the time of my birth, lived out in Narcoossee, which is now Lake Nona.
I prefer Narcoossee.
My dad was civil service.
My mom was a stay-at-home mother.
I have a brother and two sisters.
I'm a middle child.
I'm the second to the oldest.
My dad was civil service, like I said.
He was assistant chief in charge of crash rescue training at the Air Force Base.
He taught all the firefighting skills to the airmen and whoever else wanted to learn.
He learned those skills at the time.
He went all over the U.S.
He was out at Edwards.
He went to Edwards Air Force Base.
He went up to Pratt Whitney.
I believe it's Ohio.
He went all over the place to a bunch of different facilities to train and teach.
He was a good man, a very good man, my hero.
Anyway, we lived out there in Narcoossee in the woods.
Out there, things were kind of laxed.
The kids ran around in their underwear in the summertime and went down to the lake,
went swimming and fishing and just out there stomping around in the woods and stuff,
having a good time.
I remember my mom telling a story about throwing us in the back of the station wagon
and going down to the store.
Of course, we were in our underwear as kids.
By the time we got to the store, my underwear was out the window,
and I'm standing there in the back.
I'm like two years old, feeling the wind.
We get to the store, and it's like, okay, what do we do with little Jimmy?
Anyway, I was privileged to have the family life that I did.
I had a good family, a good mom, good dad, had everything I needed.
Some things I wanted, but mostly I had everything I needed.
Always had food.
Always had clothing, whether I wore it or not.
Just a good growing up atmosphere.
We were good church people, Catholic church people.
But through the years, after we lived out there for a while,
my dad got transferred up here to Orlando Air Force Base,
which was later on the Naval Training Center.
So they decided.
They decided to buy a house in Azalea Park.
This was in the mid to late 60s, or 50s, excuse me.
And so I grew up in Azalea Park, which is on the east side of town now.
And there again, back in those days, things were really cool, really laid back.
I mean, it was like a great place to grow up, a great place to live.
I had a lot of friends.
I had a lot of friends.
We had to swim and pool down the street.
Just, you know, riding bikes, skateboards, going out in the woods,
and just having a great time, you know, great childhood.
But there was something different about me.
I always felt that I just wasn't a part of, you know.
So to become a part of, you know, I was a liar.
I was a thief.
And I was a cheat to become a part of.
So I felt like I was being accepted by my group, you know.
I always had to have something a little bit better.
I embellished, let's say.
I was the great embellisher.
But, you know, as things went on, you know, it got worse.
It got worse.
I got into a lot of trouble, even before I started drinking with my lying and thieving and cheating.
In school, I got caught cheating many, many times.
I got caught lying and stealing and lying about.
I got caught the stealing until things just snowballed and snowballed and snowballed,
and I couldn't get my way out of it because I couldn't remember the original lie, you know.
It was something else.
Long about 13 years old, I discovered my mom and dad's alcohol
because they had their little stash of alcohol for Sunday or that drink before dinner, you know.
And I knew that if I could take a couple of shots of that, I'd be all right.
Well, I started doing that.
And, well, actually, the first time I did that, I got drunk.
This is about 13 years old.
So I'm a liar, a thief, and a cheat, and then I added alcohol to it.
And I liked the effects immediately.
I liked the effects produced by alcohol.
And I would sneak.
I'd do the old thing of filling the bottle back up with water.
So it was at the original mark, thinking, well, they know, you know.
They know where their alcohol level is.
But I wouldn't think I was out thinking them.
But obviously they knew there was something wrong because I was really different.
I was really different.
Went to Catholic schools, you know.
Went to Good Shepherd in grade school.
Then I went to Bishop Moore, Bishop Moore High School up there on Edgewater and Parr.
And, you know, a lot of kids got sent to Bishop Moore.
They were troubled kids.
So when they sent their troubled kids to that Catholic school,
it just meant there was a Catholic school full of troubled kids.
And let me tell you, back in the late 60s, early 70s, there was a lot of drugs.
There was a lot of promiscuity going on.
A lot of girls never graduated because they got pregnant.
A lot of stuff like that going on.
I had nothing to do with it.
But, you know, I mean, I enjoyed my grade school and high school years
because I got some good friends, some good friendships out of it.
You know, a lot of guys that I know today that I'm still friends with today
were high school and grade school chums.
A couple of them are in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous.
So that, to me, is truly a godsend.
You know?
High school, I did a lot of experimenting.
I did a lot of experimenting.
I did a lot of experimenting with other substances.
I heard that alcohol is like lighter fluid.
It starts the fire.
And for me, that's true because, you know, we'd go out to a party and it's like,
hey.
I got this new stuff called mescaline.
Or I got this new stuff, orange sunshine.
Or whatever, you know.
And it's like, here, let me try it.
And I had to try everything at least once or twice to see if I liked it.
And I usually liked it.
Got introduced to a whole lot of different things back in those days.
And I liked them all.
I wanted more and more and more of all of it because it made me feel like I was a part of,
you know, instead of apart from.
And like I said, high school was cool.
It was a lot of parties, a lot of going to the beach and partying.
We had a place down here at Paramore and Gore, the ABC, that we could go and get liquor.
Friday nights, we'd go and we'd hit that thing.
There'd be about eight or ten of us.
We'd hit that place and we'd have enough to last the weekend.
Hung out with a lot of guys from out there in Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar.
Rio Pinar was like the wealthier part of Azalea Park and the east side back in those days.
They used to have a professional golf tournament.
The Citrus opened there all the time.
So we had all these professional golfers here in town at the time.
And that was a big party, too.
But we were never without.
That's for sure.
Never without.
But in Azalea Park where I lived, I knew of...
At least three or four guys that I could go at any given time and get a bag of dope.
They always had it.
All you had to have was the money for it.
In a $20 bag, four-finger, okay?
You know, that's all part of it.
You know, it's all part of my story is the extracurricular activities.
You know, my generation's been called the television generation.
As a kid growing up,
you know, I could watch presidents being inaugurated and assassinated.
I could watch war on TV every night sitting down to dinner.
The Vietnam War was right there in living color.
It's not why I drank or why, you know, any of that, but it's part of my story.
After high school, I graduated from Bishamore by the skin of my teeth,
as so I was told by a few of my teachers.
Got out of it.
And I thought, well, hell, what am I going to do with my life?
And I looked at my dad, and I thought, huh, fire service.
My dad's done pretty good.
Let me try my hand at it.
So I got hired on by Lake Barton Fire Control District,
which is there at 436 and 50.
It's Station 66, Orange County now.
And started that career in 74.
Graduated from high school in 73.
In the middle of 74, I got hired on there.
Loved it.
I loved it.
That was my passion in those days.
A young guy on top of the world, single.
You go to a bar and tell a chick that you're a firefighter,
she was in, I mean, it was like she was all over you.
But it was like, you know, it was really cool.
I enjoyed the hell out of it.
I loved the life, you know.
24 hours on, 48 hours off.
So for 24 hours, I was fighting fire and saving lives.
And for 48 hours, I was drinking like a pig.
You know, I mean, those were my 48 hours to do with whatever I wanted.
Usually it was whatever I wanted.
And I was out there amongst them.
It's funny.
The 24 hours I was on, if we got a wreck in the middle of the night or whatever,
and it was an alcohol-involved accident,
I was cursing that son of a bitch up left and right for waking me up and causing this problem.
But then the next day, I'd be off, and I'd be right there doing the same thing he was doing.
Such a hypocrite.
But I loved the career.
I loved the fellowship.
It was really a brotherhood.
Thank you.
I stayed in the fire department for a few years.
I retired from Orange County.
I retired from Orange County because I was given an ultimatum.
Either get fired without a retirement or retire with a retirement.
I got my second DUI while I was in the fire department, and they frowned upon that.
Well, anyway, this was in the middle of the 80s.
I got my first DUI in 74.
My second one in 83 or 84.
I can't remember now.
That doesn't matter.
I got it.
Still didn't learn, you know.
Well, I was doing what I do now part-time through the fire department.
Well, I was with the fire department.
That's working through the stagehands union.
And I'm still doing that.
It's been 20-some years, but, you know, with that type of work,
it's just...
It used to be a big party.
Things have really gotten tight there now.
I mean, there's a lot of drug testing and stuff like that going on.
So I'm okay with that.
But, you know, I drank like there was no tomorrow.
I partied hard those days that I was off duty.
I was married, lost that due to my drinking.
My wife got pregnant.
Like, the third year we were married,
and I believe I was the cause of her miscarriage.
We got into a big...
Never got physical, but it was a big, huge fight.
And it doesn't have to get physical for a woman to miscarry.
But...
I enjoyed it to the point where, like I said,
they asked me to retire.
So I did.
Got out of that, but once it's in your blood,
you can't, you know, you can't get a transfusion and it's gone.
I still feel it in the back of my neck
every time an engine or a tower drives by
with red lights and sirens going.
But anyway, I went on to become...
to working in the stagehands union.
So...
So...
So...
This was, let's see,
late 80s, early 90s.
I decided to take a break from that
and pursue a different career.
I went to work at Orlando General Hospital,
which is Florida East, I believe now.
And I went to work, believe it or not,
as an orderly in surgery.
I wanted to get back into the medical field.
So because I was an EMT in the fire department,
I figured maybe I would try my luck at nursing
or something along those lines.
I worked there for about...
about a year and a half, almost two years.
But while I was working there,
they did an intervention on me
because of my drinking
and my actions.
They had a little meeting.
I came in to check in.
I came in, punched the clock.
Went into the little room,
changed into my scrubs.
The head nurse came in and she goes,
Hey, Jimmy, can you step into my office here?
Okay, all right.
Went in there and everybody's there.
I mean, everybody that I worked with,
I don't know if you've seen that on TV,
but everybody's there.
And it's like they say,
Well, you know,
we got another ultimatum for you.
You can either go to a 28-day rehab
or you can pick up your last paycheck.
Ain't no dummy.
I went to the 28-day rehab thinking,
Okay, you know, I do have to do something.
I got to do something if it's getting to this point.
Well, I went up to the 28-day rehab.
It was up in Lake Mary,
a place called Care Unit.
And boy, did I have them bullshitted.
I really did because
I went in there with
with every intention of
beating their system.
And I got out 28 days later.
I mean, I was elected like the head drunk.
You know, I was like the liaison
between the people running it and the crew.
So, I mean, if there was anybody there
that had a problem,
I was like in the office.
I was the go-between.
I was elected by the group.
You know, they thought that I had my shit together
and I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I was the go-between.
And I thought that, you know,
I could do this for them.
But there again, I had other ideas.
And that was to get out.
You know, I did get a belly
or a mind full of AA.
I did.
I got out and I stayed sober
for about nine months.
And figured I got it.
I don't need this.
It was New Year's
a year later.
met a girl
started drinking
and
I stayed drunk for 20 years
stayed drunk for
well I don't know
this was early 90's till 2005
I stayed drunk for a long time
my drinking
I could hide it
but then again I couldn't
because my mom and dad could see right through me
I thought I was doing well
I thought I was one of those guys
in the book it talks about
if he can go out and do some responsible drinking
we'll take our hats off to him
you know and say hey
you have our blessing
but you know I could go
sometimes I could go to the bar and drink one or two drinks
and then go home
other times it was go to the bar
drink two or three or four drinks
go home and fix it the way I wanted to
but
that's the way it started
after I'd been in rehab
I always had that thought though
in my mind
I always had AA in my mind
things just progressed
and progressed
and progressed
got to the point where
I was starting my days
with a big old glass
half vodka
half grapefruit
or cranberry
and then going to work
going to do my stagehand thing
because I lost the job at the hospital
so I went back to doing stage work
and this was back in the mid 80s
early 90s
or early 90s
late 90s
into the late 90s
and it was the norm
I mean we'd go to lunch
and eat a couple of chicken wings
and have two pitchers of beer
you know
and be smoking joints the whole day
so we stayed under the influence 24-7
I had alcohol coursing through my veins
24-7
didn't stop me
I just
I couldn't stop
let's see
like about
I got my third DUI
in the mid 90s
and all this time
I never had a driver's license
so I'd been popped periodically
for driving on a suspended license
I mean
I don't know how many times
I got picked up for that
I remember the judge saying one time
if I see you again
it's going to be
it's going to go down as habitual
luckily I think he retired
but
it's like
you know
I mean
it didn't stop me
that kind of stuff didn't stop me
got my third DUI
my dad
who was getting on in years
had just bought a brand new truck
this is a new one
1999
just bought a brand new truck
and I said wow man
I really like
dad you got good taste
always did
a few years later
he got to the point where
his health was failing
and he goes
I'm going to be getting rid of my truck
do you think you can
take it
do you think you can
get this truck
I said well
I'd like to
let me do
see what
I'm still drinking
I had no intention
of ever getting my driver's license back
but
this was intuitive
this was
this was
this was something I wanted
was my dad's truck
so
I did some investigating
and I found out
that I could get
my driver's license back
I just had to
you know
do the boogie woogie
that the state wanted me to
so I did
I had to go to
AA meetings
I had to go to
counseling
had to go through
the safety council
had to spend money
hand over fist
but I did
because that was something
that I really wanted
I ended up
I ended up
getting my license back
which was
a miracle in itself
because I thought
I would never
ever be able to
still drinking
still drinking
this is
2000
yeah right around
the year 2000
okay
I
I stayed drunk
pretty much all the time
like I said
it was coursing through my veins
24-7
I bet you
any given time
if I had to drop a urine
or take blood
they would find more alcohol
than blood in my streams
but
you know
that's the way I was living
that's the way I was existing
I wouldn't really call it living
September 11, 2001
hit me hard
still hits me hard
when that day occurred
when that day happened
I was at work
I was at the Marriott World
out there off of
World Trade
and
they immediately put
all these big screen TVs up
so we could watch
we had an international
dental instrument show
going on
all flights stopped
there was no aircraft
anywhere
this show just
basically
stopped itself
I mean there was nothing
we could do about it
but to stand there
and sit there
in the lobby
and watch
those towers come down
was just
unbelievable
and knowing that
Brother Firefighters
were going up
those stairs
so
like I said
that hit me hard
that hit me hard
that hit me real hard
it probably intensified
my alcohol abuse
immense
it did
it did really
I was drinking a whole lot then
as a matter of fact
the woman
that I was living with
at the time
she goes like
she was an alcoholic also
still is
she goes
I can't live with you
you're going crazy
and I said
well
the hell out
I was like
at work
I had my first seizure
that was about
2000
2004
had my first
alcohol related seizure
woke up in the ER
people looking at me like
and I'm looking at them like
what the hell happened
you know
the doctor said
you need to slow down
you need to quit
I said okay
when do I get out of here
they said
well
you know
we can sign you out
we can sign you out right now
I went immediately to the bar
after having my first
alcohol related seizure
about
three months later
I had my second
alcohol related seizure
same scenario
ER
same ER
they gave me
I forget what the hell
medication they gave me
but
but
it was some kind of
anti-seizure
kind of thing
I don't know
but
again
as soon as I got released
I went back to the bar
went right back
that's what I did
that was what I did
a few months later
well
through this
through this period of drinking
and abusing myself
I acquired gout
if anybody in here
has ever had gout
then they'll know
what I'm talking about
it is the
most single
painful
affliction
you can ever have
for this drunk anyway
well anyway
I'm stuck on a couch
with both knees swollen
both ankles swollen
both toes
you know
great toes
swollen
I couldn't hardly move
but I could
crutch it in
to get some ice
I could crutch it in
to get some ice
and fill that big old jug
up with vodka
and then crutch it back out
and camp there
on the couch
I was like
the 2004 hurricanes
when they came through here
heard the roof
going off my house
I couldn't do nothing
but make it into the kitchen
and put more ice in my jug
turns out that
the girl that I had
tossed out
of my life
still had enough
enough
she cared about me enough
to get a hold of a guy
that I worked with
who's in AA
and they came and did a job
and they put a 12 step on me
this was about
February
February 2005
I said yeah
come on let's go
I need this
I need this bad
well you know
I'm going to tell you right now
I didn't stay sober
I went to meetings
but I always came back
and I always had a stash
ended up losing that
house where I was living
duplex where I was living
and having to put everything in storage
and moving back in with mom and dad
I basically was in dry
I was dry from about
ok
from July to August
came back into the rooms
and I picked up a white chip
August 14th
so that's basically my sobriety date
when I was dry
when I was enthused
and I was still crazy
August 14th
2005
I was lucky enough
to be off
work
and I was able to do
the proposed 90 and 90
the first 90 days
I went to meetings
all day
every day
I would start off
at the Blue Bottoms meeting
down south Orlando
where I met Terry Lamont
and that guy
Peggy Purser
and the whole
I mean Bobo Lewis
all those good old drunks
and I loved them to death
every single one of them
they got me sober
went from there
to the south side
the Crossroads group
spent the afternoon there
then rode the bus home
so I lived
in an AA clubhouse
during the day
and then went home to mom and dad's
where it was strict
it was strict
strict stuff
but that's what I needed
I needed that
that structure
you know
started doing a lot of reading
my sponsor at the time
George Ballou
he was
it's like you come into the rooms
you start your steps
and we started doing the steps
like that week
never finished them with him
but we started them
and I got a good sponsor
after I had George
and I got a good sponsor
and we did finish them
but
it's like
while I'm living there
I'm getting stronger
both
spiritually
with
you know
what's going on with AA
in my life
and
and I'm ready to go
I'm ready to get back
into the swing of things
so with the help of my mom and dad
I
got this little apartment
right around the corner
from where they lived
my dad's health is failing
you know
this whole time
he's on oxygen
and
just not getting around
like he used to
hell he's 92 years old
you know
but
their lifelong dream
was to move into
Orlando Lutheran Towers
so when I moved out
that was their cue
to move in there
and that was where
my mom and dad
just found it
they found the happiest place
on the earth
that they could
and
and
my mom's still there
my dad's passed
but it was like
you know
that's
that's exactly what my dad wanted
he worked all his life
for
for that
and my mom
and him
were just
right where God wanted them
so
you know
this is
I've been in the same place
the same apartment now
since then
since 2005
and a half
2006
you know
Alcoholics Anonymous
I used to go to
Siscoff
I mean
when I was forced
to come here
and
you know
with the DUIs
and
I didn't want it
I didn't want anything
to do with you losers
you know
but I was the biggest loser
out there
I can remember
the last time
that I was forced to go
to AA
I would sit out
in the parking lot
down there at Crossroads
and I'd wait
until the last person
which I thought
would be the last person
going in the door
so I'd wait
so I could sneak in
and just sit at the seat
that was next to
the door
and
you know
when you open the door
and walk in
everybody's going to
turn around
and look at you
right
how was I to know
there was two or three people
that I worked with in there
so it was like
okay
alright
but like I was going to say
you know
Alcoholics Anonymous
most definitely
has saved my life
you know
Ernie my
my good friend
and sponsor
from down there
at Southside
we went through the steps
and I went through the steps
fighting
every inch
he says
well you got to do this
if you don't want to drink
you got to do this
if you want to stay sober
I said well I want to stay sober
but I don't want to do this
which is you know
fighting tooth and nail
I don't know how long
it took for me
to go through the steps
with him
but it was quite some time
I got to a point
where I got complacent
down there
and it was a small group
and I could hear
the same thing
from every person
every night
and it just got old
and I knew it was me
it wasn't them
it was me
so I made
in sobriety
a geographical change
from Southside
to Central
and let me tell you what
this group
this clubhouse
is so diversified
this is what I needed
this is what I needed
I needed to have
a group
all the different types
of people here
you know
to keep me interested
to keep me wanting
you know
we're told
that we have to come
we have to keep coming back
to AA meetings
as long as we
you know
need to
until we want to
and when we want to
it's like
it's a given
and I want to come
to meetings now
I love coming to meetings
because this is where
I learn how to live life
on life's terms
from you people
and my home group
is the noon meeting
that is my home group
those are my peeps
my tribe
whatever
but it doesn't matter
I'll make
if I'm not working
I'll make two or three meetings a day
and they're all down right here
I've been known to start
at the 6.30 meeting
and work my way up
but it's been a while
but you know
there's no way
I can ever
repay Alcoholics Anonymous
what I've been given
and I'm not going to
you know
I still
I still have those
life on life's terms
I still get thrown curves
my dad passed in sobriety
you know
I had another fight
with the state of Florida
over my driver's license
14 months
that I was without
a driver's license
in sobriety
you know
I just haven't found
a reason to drink
you know
I just haven't found
a sufficient enough
reason for me
to pick up a drink
or a drug
and I'm not going to
have any sense
you know
and I owe it all
to my higher power
to
good orderly direction
from a group of drunks
however you want to put it
you know
this is
I mean
I wouldn't have a life
if it wasn't for these rooms
my mom gets to
come to one meeting
a year
my anniversary
is going to be next month
August
and she gets to come
to the
birthday meeting
at the end of the month
and she looks forward
to that every year
she wanted to come
and listen to me tonight
and I said
no I don't think so
I love you
but no I don't think so
but you know
that's just it
she goes
she said to me
a few years ago
she goes
can I make a donation
to AA
I said
what are you talking about
she goes
I'd like to write him a check
I said well
you know
it's not a big deal
it's kind of frowned upon
you know
I mean
we stay
we stay
functioning
through our own contributions
you know
if you were to do
something like that
you might start a trend
where everybody
would want to donate
to AA
and it would just get to be
too much
you know
it's like the old days
they wanted to start
AA Bill
and those guys
wanted to start
their own AA hospitals
and stuff
and it just doesn't work
that way
all I know
is that
uh
you know
when Ebby and Bill
were sitting around
that kitchen table
many many years ago
and Bob pushed that bottle
over to Ebby
and said
here have a snort
and Ebby said
no I found religion
I think that's what
sparked Bill
that's what sparked Bill
on this whole
spirituality thing
and I'm grateful for Ebby
for doing that
even though
Ebby died a drunk
he didn't stay sober
but Bill and Bob did
um
and I'm grateful
okay I'm done
but uh
this
this program
if you're new
or you're coming back
it's like my old
uh
friend
uh
um
Terry Lamont said
stick around
there's a miracle
with your name on it
and to close things up
I'd like to read something
out of the big book
of Alcoholics Anonymous
abandon yourself to God
as you understand God
omit your faults to him
and to your fellows
clear away the wreckage
of your past
give freely of what you find
and join us
we shall be with you
in the fellowship of the spirit
and you will surely meet
some of us
as you trudge
as you trudge the road
of happy destiny
may God bless you
and keep you until then
thank you
applause
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laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
laughter
here at Central Orlando group
and other groups around
Central Florida
and all of Florida
we celebrate
continuous links of sobriety
with chips
and I have
he told me
but I forgot
I hope it's Bradley
he told me
Hey Chips
here at Central
as he said
we designate sobriety
with colorful chips
we start off with a year
does anyone have a birthday today?
what do we say?
we need a birthday
alright we got nine months
colorful purple
anyone picking up
a nine month chip today?
pregnancies count
keep them back
alright six months
red chips
six months
anybody?
alright what do we say?
we got a birthday
alright next is 90 days
green
90 days
what do we say?
we got a birthday
alright 30 days
and nights
anyone?
alright what do we say?
we got a birthday
we got a birthday
we got a birthday
alright and the most
important one
white chip
the chip of surrender
desire to stop doing it
you want to join our
way of life today
come on
come on
you guys can do it
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