Doug R. on Total Surrender and the 12 Steps as Exercises in Letting Go

About This Speaker Tape

Doug R. shares his journey of recovery, emphasizing that there is no substitute for surrender. He reflects on his early years in AA, admitting that he spent his first eight months attending meetings while continuing to drink and lying about his sobriety dates, even leading a meeting while under the influence.

He describes a series of physical catastrophes, including skiing off a cliff and falling off a four-story parking structure, as well as the emotional pain of being barred from seeing his daughter while drunk. These events, coupled with a pointed conversation with a friend about 'brain death,' eventually pushed him toward a genuine surrender.

Doug discusses his transition from a life of rock and roll and drug use to a spiritual life. He concludes by discussing the Big Book and the 12 Steps, arguing that every single step is an exercise in surrender rather than attributing a single principle to a specific step.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Doug introduces himself and discusses his love for speaking at meetings.
• 6:45 Story of Ara from Tel Aviv and the importance of face-to-face meetings versus online.
• 11:50 Admission of leading a meeting while drunk and using tacos and onion rings to hide the smell.
• 18:20 Recounts his first drink at 18 and his career in the musical 'Hair'.
• 23:40 Description of the skiing accident and the fall from the parking structure.
• 28:15 The realization of 'brain death' and the decision to finally surrender.
• 33:10 His first AA meeting experience and his initial reaction to the Big Book.
• 41:30 Sucking whiskey out of a bedspread and the subsequent series of spiritual coincidences.
• 46:50 Discussion on the principles of the steps and the necessity of surrender in each.