Closed My Eyes to Meditate and Fell Asleep — Got in a Fight with My Nephew About Whether That Counts 😅 – Ken H.

About This Speaker Tape

Ken H. tells his story at what appears to be a meeting connected to the 8111 Club on Roswell Road. He grew up in a family where his parents did not get along, and he started drinking at 14 — getting arrested at a football game after raiding his father's liquor cabinet. He built a successful business in Atlanta but his drinking, pot use, and cocaine led to escalating consequences. The defining event was a car accident on GA-400 in 1988 where he hit a woman who crossed lanes — she never woke up. He was just under the legal limit but refused the blood test, knowing the marijuana would show. He fought the charges with a private investigator and lawyer, dodging serious prison time through a series of legal breaks, but remained in complete denial about his responsibility.

His wife gave him an ultimatum in 1991, and he quit drinking and pot on a $500 bet with a friend — but switched to cocaine after eleven years away from it. By 1993 his business was $32,000 in debt, his wife was leaving, and he was driving a repo truck without a license. He entered AA on the 27th of that year and began attending three meetings a day. His first sponsor was Papa Bill, a man who got sober at 67 and died at 97 with 30 years. Bill would drive Ken to first-step meetings at Northside Hospital, Charter Peachford, and a prison facility in Alpharetta. About six months in, Ken broke down in a meeting and finally accepted responsibility for the woman's death.

Ken describes working Steps Four through Seven with a second sponsor, Jerry Montgomery, who identified his core defects — defensive, condescending, judgmental, justification, and ego. Jerry assigned him to pray on his knees three times a day for 30 days asking for their removal. Ken explains how this practice taught him to catch defensiveness in the moment before it cascaded into his other defects. He shares how his amends process revealed that his resentments toward his wife were really about his own deception — sneaking golf clubs out of the house, putting on sunblock so she would not know he had been outside. He describes repairing his relationship with his 94-year-old mother and his ongoing commitment to the 6:15 a.m. meeting where he still greets newcomers every day, more than 30 years later.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Meeting opening and reading from page 29 of the Big Book
• 1:30 Tim introduces Ken, shares how Ken talked to him at the 6:15 a.m. meeting in his first two weeks of sobriety
• 4:00 Ken describes growing up in a family where his parents did not get along, trying to excel for attention
• 5:30 First drink at 14 — raided dad's liquor cabinet, arrested at a football game
• 8:00 Fatal car accident on GA-400 in 1988 — hit a woman who crossed three lanes, she never woke up
• 13:00 Enters AA in 1993, attending three meetings a day, meets sponsor Papa Bill at 8111 Club
• 18:00 Driving Papa Bill to first-step meetings — grabs the steering wheel when Bill drifts across the yellow line in the rain
• 22:00 Breaks down in a meeting six months in, finally accepts responsibility for the woman's death
• 28:00 Second sponsor Jerry Montgomery assigns 30-day prayer discipline for character defects three times daily on his knees
• 35:00 Amends work reveals his resentments toward his wife were really about his own deception — sneaking golf clubs, wearing sunblock