Bonnie C. – Service – Progress Not Perfection In Service Work – 2014

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Audience member Hello. Audience member Hello. Audience Member Hello. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It was amazing. It was such a great experience. Thank you, Dr. discussing this. You know, as far as my impact and how it's acesso to what I was seeing and how I see change, it was really a huge part of the process for me to change what I saw andCómo therefore we've shared this experience. And so, connecting people and think about what we might be doing. I think I finally got to that point. Take out an opportunity. Talk to me. Talk to me. Just a couple of hours or so. Nothing yet. Can you�." Yeah. Well, that's still coming up next year. and continue to do. I've been involved in service work almost as long as I've been clean. I've actually been involved in service work longer than I've had a sponsor because when I first got involved in service work, I really didn't know what I was getting myself into, but this guy at the treatment facility I was at asked me if I'd want to serve on his committee for the local area committee. I said, sure, and I think that was about, I don't know, that was a couple weeks before I got my sponsor, I think, or maybe right after I got my sponsor. It was right around the same time, and I said yes. I didn't know what I was getting myself into, but I've been involved consistently with service work since then, at least two or three service commitments. At one point, I actually had to start curtailing myself because I catch myself wanting to say yes and realize I had absolutely no time between work and going to meetings. And, you know, just little things like having a life to, you know, be able to commit myself to anything else. Service work has, in general, been something that has been highly motivating for me and has been something that, you know, I've had a passion for and a desire to do. But I think like anything else, no matter how much you enjoy things, there's going to be aspects of that and parts of that that are not what you really enjoy doing and are very easy to put off and to become apathetic about. I've been on the activities committee for a few years now for my area, and we handle the, in our area, we handle the marathon meetings, which for me personally are not something I really enjoy doing. It's always something I'm just like, oh, Jesus is coming up. And I always show up. I always do my shift. But I don't want to give of myself like I do in other areas of my service work. And that's something I really need to work on. Because, I mean, again, that's something that I've said, yes, I'm going to be on this committee, I'm going to do this, and I'm going to give, you know, my best effort to be a part of it. And it's just one of those things that I keep kind of pushing to the side and, you know, knowing that I'll show up and knowing that I'll do it, but, you know, waiting until the absolute last second to, you know, to leave for it. Or waiting until the last second if we need supplies for one of them to go get them. A lot of times that last second being on the way to the actual marathon meeting. And then being like, you know, 5. 5 minutes late. And it's, you know, again, these are just examples of the ways that I find that this stuff creeps up in my life. So that, you know, it's like I have to remember, even when I'm doing positive things and good things, that it's really easy for the, you know, for apathy, for procrastination to come right back flying in there right along with the good. You know, not that either one of those things are a positive thing in our life. But I think it. It does, you know, when we recognize apathy and procrastination and how they affect us in our lives, I think that does allow us to be more appreciative of when we're not procrastinating and when we're not being apathetic about something. Because, you know, and especially if it's something that in the past, you know, has plagued us, that has been something that we've consistently put off and consistently said, you know, to hell with it. I'm not going to bother with it. You know, it's just not worth my time. And then, you know, as we grow and, you know, as I've grown. As I've matured in this process. I'm finding that there are at least some things that I don't put off anymore. That, you know, I do run head on and say, yeah, I'll do that. And I do put all my energy into. And I do care about. And I, you know, do find myself liking to do. That I do enjoy. That I wouldn't have, you know, six months, a year, two years ago. So, again, like so many other things, you know, it's about the progress. It's not about perfection. If I try and be perfect in everything I do every day, you know, who am I kidding? I'm just going to be pissed off at myself all the time. I'm always going to fall short, you know. I mean, I don't think there is such a thing as perfection. There can be really, really, really, really damn good. But, you know, I don't think there's too many things, you know, other than, you know, the only thing I've been perfect at since I got, you know, since I started coming around to these meetings was not picking up. You know, that is the only thing I've managed to do, you know, with perfect consistency. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. my life outside of the fellowship. The opportunities I have today outside of this fellowship, I could not. They talk about if we made a list in our first year of what we wanted to accomplish, we'd just be selling ourselves short if we looked at it a few years later. Man, some of the things I've managed to do, even in the short time I've been in recovery, it's stuff in a lot of cases that I literally dreamed of doing for years. I've been able to travel and spend time doing, seeing music and seeing places that I just never expected to be possible. Not with the way I was living my life before. Surely, in some cases, I didn't think it was going to be possible in recovery. I found out, much to my surprise, that not only was it possible, but it enhanced. It made my recovery better because of it. That's about all I've got. Thanks for letting me share. Thanks for listening. Thanks for letting me be here. Good job. Thank you.