Attitude Plus Gratitude Will Equal Your Recovery — Liz Bailey at Forty-Six Years Sober – Liz B.

About This Speaker Tape

Liz Bailey from Hollis, NY shares her story at the 12th Annual Mississippi Old Timers Roundup in Jackson, MS in 1998. Sober since July 11, 1952, she came in at age 31 after 19 years of drinking that began at age 12 when her mother had her sieve rice wine through cheesecloth. Oldest of five, raised in Manhattan, her father was a pitiful drunk who eventually hung himself at Central Islip. She married Mr. Bailey at 17 on January 3, 1939, and describes it as the sorriest day of his life.

Her drinking progressed through bathtub gin sales, burned legs on a frozen chicken, broken fingers, busted ribs she blamed on Mr. Bailey (who never touched her — he just stepped over her), blackouts lasting up to three weeks, and a suicide attempt at a second-floor window that Mr. Bailey invited Nana Baca to let her complete. After a drunk where she missed an insurance-lady visitor she had been anticipating, she screamed to Higher Power in her basement for two days and called AA. At her first meeting, two women behind the coffee counter said she didn't look like an alcoholic — she nearly bolted until a man caught her shoulder.

Her sponsor of 28 years told her AA don't need you, Liz Bailey, but you need AA, and sit on that pot or get up off it. She cried for five years. She spoke for Bill Wilson's 28th anniversary at the Hotel Commodore at 10 years sober. She left her $60,000 home for a room and kitchenette rather than drink. She made amends to Mr. Bailey, nursed him until his death August 12, 1989, and he left her the house. Her son Dennis was shot and killed at 28. Her oldest son Richard hasn't forgiven her in 46 years. Her daughter has had six mental breakdowns and Lou Gehrig's disease.

At 77, 31 years an arrested cancer patient, throat cut ear to ear, she still travels constantly. Her key came at 20 years: seek Higher Power first. She prays at 2, 3, or 4 AM before speaking to anyone. The only person she hasn't made amends to is her bartender — she bought him a new Cadillac every year sitting on the bar stool. Her message: attitude plus gratitude equals recovery, and the gift has to be given away to keep it.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Apologizes to woman with 44 years she had offended earlier, opens with You Light Up My Life
• 3:00 Father's drinking — policeman beatings, neighbors hitting him with frying pans, Mother Cabrini Hospital
• 5:30 First drunk at 12 sieving and sipping rice wine through cheesecloth while Marion went home
• 8:00 Selling King Kong booze by the cream pitcher, padlocked into side room for her protection
• 11:30 Married Mr. Bailey January 3, 1939 crying at the ceremony — sorriest day of his life
• 16:00 Leopard coat she gave away because he made it so he could spot me anywhere
• 22:00 Suicide attempt at second-floor window — Mr. Bailey tells Nana Baca to let that bitch jump
• 28:00 Missed insurance lady visit, went to VFW post jukebox, woke up in son's twin bed with mother screaming
• 34:00 First AA meeting — two girls say you don't look like an alcoholic, man catches her shoulder
• 48:00 Speaking for Bill Wilson's 28th anniversary at Hotel Commodore to 2,700 people at 10 years sober