Steps 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 and 9 – Twelve Step Workshop – Part 4 of 4 – 2002 – Bob O.

About This Speaker Tape

Twelve Step Workshop - 2002

A raw no-nonsense dissection of the wreckage caused by ego and the mechanics of the early steps. Bob O. doesn't sugarcoat the damage describing how he used mean-spiritedness and manipulation to keep partners off-balance so they wouldn't see the real him. He pivots from the danger of 'take it to the grave' secrets—illustrated by a woman's paralyzing fear of HIV—to the gritty reality of the Fifth Step. He warns against 'life story' inventories and sponsors who operate from the ego insisting that the program is a set of spiritual exercises for alcoholics not a social club for 'overthinkers.' The narrative culminates in the necessity of the Ninth Step sharing a story of a man who faked a workplace accident for $40,000 and faced the terror of potential prison to balance his books with a Higher Power.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Bob O. discusses the peripheral harm caused by manipulative relationships and the use of jealousy as a tool.
• 4:15 Discussion on writing sexual ideals to avoid 'push-pull' bullsh*t in relationships.
• 7:30 The danger of 'take it to the grave' secrets; story of a woman fearing she had AIDS.
• 11:20 Step 5: Advice on tackling the worst secrets first to avoid spending the whole session in fear.
• 14:45 Laughter: Bob O. describes the boredom of repetitive, 32-hour Fifth Step inventories.
• 18:10 Explanation of Steps 6 and 7 as a process of 'fact-finding and fact-facing' to remove unsaleable goods.
• 23:40 AA History: The origins of 'AA Comes of Age' and Bill W.'s role as a promoter.
• 27:15 The insistence that AA is strictly about alcoholism, not a general fellowship for all addictions.
• 31:00 Sponsorship: Warning against sponsors who operate from the ego and direct the sponsee's life.
• 35:20 Step 8 and 9: The importance of identifying the specific harm before making amends.
• 38:45 Story of a man who faked a construction accident for $40,000 and the risk of jail during amends.