Newcomers Aren’t Reading the Big Book — They’re Reading the Room – Frank W.

About This Speaker Tape

Frank W., aka Huggy Bear, tells his story at a Blue Chip Speakers meeting with 27 years of sobriety (sobriety date 10-31-89). A 59-year-old Atlanta native with a Cherokee grandmother, he grew up watching his father drink and modeling himself on hard-drinking, brawling movie men. After the Marine Corps he became a drug dealer who didn't use his own product — carrying two pistols, a blackjack, and seven knives everywhere, including into his first AA meetings.

The event that cracked him open was the drowning death of his young son while his wife was inside gossiping with her mother. Nothing would numb it — not Quaaludes, not acid, not drinking. A DUI stop with an open beer, two lit joints, and every weapon he owned in the back seat should have sent him to prison for five years on an HB probationary license, but the judge waived it because of the death. His lawyer told him to go to AA meetings to look good in court. He walked into Biscayne, sat down, and watched people physically move away from him.

Carl S., a 320-pound tattooed man who was always happy, became his keep-it-simple sponsor. Carl made him quit carrying guns and knives to meetings, stand in front of a mirror while he talked, and write 'Frank, you're wrong' on the bathroom glass so he'd see it every morning. Craig Pierce became his Higher Power sponsor, asking 'Where's Higher Power in all that, Frank?' whenever he brought a problem. Mary Campbell — a 300-pound grandma type who was anything but sweet one-on-one — was his grief sponsor, telling him stories about Bill and Lois while he drove her home from meetings.

He calls his Higher Power 'Grandfather.' He's served 13 terms on the Nava board, been president five times, and washes coffee cups because service kept him in the room when nothing else would. His closing message: take the steps, don't 'work' them — the steps work on you. Newcomers want fast-food recovery, drive-through sobriety. The ones who don't do the work get buried.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Introduction reading from Big Book page 29; intro of Frank W., aka Huggy Bear, aka Dad
• 2:00 Sobriety date 10-31-89, 27 years, Atlanta native, Cherokee grandmother
• 6:00 Father getting sober when Frank was 17; shuttling drunks in his dad's Cadillac to meetings
• 10:00 Marine Corps years — what he brought back and what he left behind
• 15:00 Son's drowning while wife was inside gossiping with her mother — nothing numbed it
• 19:00 DUI arrest with open beer, two joints, weapons in back seat; HB probationary license and five-year prison sentence waived
• 24:00 First Biscayne meeting — people physically moving away from him; Mary Ann Kay the only one who would speak
• 30:00 Carl S. as sponsor — quit carrying guns and knives to meetings, mirror exercise, 'Frank, you're wrong' on the glass
• 38:00 Nava service — 13 years on the board, five-time president; coffee cups and ashtrays at Biscayne
• 46:00 Craig Pierce as Higher Power sponsor; Mary Campbell as grief sponsor; calls his Higher Power 'Grandfather'
• 52:00 Take the steps, don't work them — fast-food recovery vs. doing the work; closing