He Like Me Is Perhaps Spiritually Sick — Page 67 From the Witness Stand – Carla R.

About This Speaker Tape

Carla R., sober since September 25, 1987, shares at an AA anniversary event with her husband in the room. She opens with full-circle gratitude: her daughter graduated high school pregnant at 18, and now that grandson just graduated. She met her husband in AA at 21 years sober and 51 years old, calls him a gift of the program, and credits AA with making her ready to receive him.

She traces her drinking from a straight-A elementary schooler into a junior-high girl branded a slut after a spin-the-bottle incident, then a 12-year-old hitchhiker cycling through Indio Jail, Riverside Juvenile Hall, and LA Central Juvenile. At 14 she was turning tricks in North Beach San Francisco; at 15 she was committed to a mental hospital for a year on Thorazine, Mellaril, Valium, and five-point restraints. She describes falling for sexy smoldering boys in the nuthouse who hurled chairs and nurses through plate glass windows, and pressing her face to the bay window singing Diana Ross.

She tried Southern Baptist, Catholic, and burned black candles to the other guy. Her higher power at 17 was Kung Fu's David Carradine. She lost her first daughter and a Hollywood bartending job in one afternoon on Cuervo Gold and Bud Backs at a halfway-point bar. A gin-drunk phone call to a battered women's shelter sent her to her first AA meeting, where she misheard the message as switch to beer, delaying sobriety almost two years. A sober neighbor with a Big Book and a 12x12 finally reached her.

At five years sober a man she had watched get sober thirty days before her broke into her bedroom, held a knife to her neck, raped and robbed her. He had left AA for church. On the witness stand she found forgiveness through page 67: he, like me, is perhaps spiritually sick. Her baby sister died by suicide at 17, her 6'10" baby brother died of crank and alcoholism at 30, and she buried her mother clean and clear. She closes with a rumba lesson (don't try to dance like a good girl, they won't believe you anyway) and a pit bull puppy who meets the same food, same yard, same people with ecstatic gratitude every morning.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:30 Thanks host Sandy, introduces husband as a gift of the program — met him at 21 years sober, age 51
• 3:00 Grandson's high school graduation closes the circle on daughter's pregnant senior year 18 years earlier
• 6:00 Sobriety date September 25, 1987; home group Sober on the Rock, Sunland CA
• 9:00 Spin the Bottle in junior high — branded a slut, first social resentment, starts the double life
• 12:00 Hitchhiking at 12 through Indio Jail, Riverside Juvenile, LA Central Juvenile
• 14:00 North Beach San Francisco at 14 — prostitution, a new career path in ten minutes
• 16:00 One year in a mental hospital at 15 on Thorazine, Mellaril, Valium, Dalmane, five-point restraints
• 23:00 Higher power at 17 is David Carradine's Kung Fu; escapes girls' home to Oregon through a second-story window
• 34:00 Loses daughter and job on a barstool in one afternoon over Cuervo Gold and Bud Backs
• 42:00 Sober neighbor brings Big Book and 12x12 — her calm not-drinking gets Carla's attention
• 55:00 Raped at knifepoint at five years sober by a man she watched get sober 30 days before her
• 62:00 Witness stand forgiveness through page 67 — he like me is perhaps spiritually sick
• 70:00 Rumba teacher: don't try to dance like a good girl, they won't believe you anyway
• 73:00 Pit bull puppy meets same food, same yard, same faces with ecstatic gratitude every morning