Can You Stay Sober Just One Day? That Was the Only Question That Worked – Bill T.

Thank you for this privilege of being here tonight. Help me, dear Lord, that I may stay suddenly to help someone, and they in return will go up and help someone. We thank you for everything. Amen. Well, indeed, a place to be, you know. I get scared every once in a while, it seems like so many good things happen to me. So many people come by and either shake hands, because Bill, I remember you from when I was old. And I don't want them to be like they're reading my obituary or something like that. But it does make a fellow think, you know. Sometimes I think about this year, Papa was going to the graveyard. And he was just reading the epitaph, the landline, Jim Jones, born in 1857, died in 1912. Over there, there lied so and so and so and so. And so he went there and he seen that another one. And he said, Paul, I send you as you perished through, so I would want to stay with you. As I am now, soon you shall be. So be prepared to follow me. Careful, get out of me, Cratchit. Get him. I'll eat me even, Timothy Lydon. He said, to follow you, I'll not be the kid till I find out which way you went. We have to, in the air, we have to be very careful who we follow. The thing with me sounds like a dog but it really cheers. You know, I wouldn't be here. I've been going what you say. Someone would ask me, Bill, I come sober. My answer would be to him, I met a man. Yes, I did. Thirteen years ago, I met a man. I met a man. Well, he says you've met men before, but no, none like this man. Yes, I've met many a man. And that man was very well met. And I think that I would say, you know, I felt as though that I was their superior. Which I was their superior because I had a finite on my belt and I had another couple more bucks in my pocket to buy another fight. You know, it seemed as though that bottle always took over with your collar. Sometimes I wondered about this guy, how he'd come to get that person. And could I have been insane or catch him in a panic if he was down there somewhere? You know, that's my first introduction to him. The man went on about twelve steps. You know, that's my first introduction to him. And he said, you turn your will and your life over to God as the unfaithful. Now, how could that happen? I've never been to church. I don't know anything about the Bible. Very little. That's what it's written. But I thought something that I don't know. I don't have to know very much about it. Because he said, and I understand. He said, I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. I understand. Not as a minister, it's not as a meh-men would understand, but I could understand. I brief you of the foreign language that today I'll get us some money. Tomorrow I'll get us some money. If I continue in the program I'll continue to get it." And it had been so. And about the sanity pod? Sure. I must admit. For a man for thirty-some years. I would just stagger up the streets. And I went around. I was young. to go buy a 50, a 50, a two-fifth, and say one time, because he's got a few more dollars left, that I think I'll get a pint of a 50 gin, I'll have something to go with it, and feel elated when I bring these three-fifths home, and he said, just a minute, honey, I got to go out and get me a case of beer. It wasn't a matter of fact that I have chicken or did I have beets for my family or something. I bought something, and I shopped for it. Now, I didn't shop for the Lexus, but I shopped for the meat. How much is that? How much is that? How much? It wasn't a matter of a price of this Lexus that I bought. No time. I could just ching y'all. Now, I feel all right now if I did that, say, on my birthday or week after, you know, or the day I, I mean, when I went on a vacation. That'd have been all right. But every day, you know, I'm proud of my birthday, you know. I said, people always want to have a good time on the holiday. I said, every day's a holiday. You know, you could sway with that, you know. Every day is a holiday. I took it at that, too. But you know, we have some stormy days on the holiday. You can't go out. Right after one of my holidays, things got a little thorny in the house, you know. Sometimes the teachers come up with the ball off the wall. They take the ball off the wall, but they can't. I used to say, you know, one thing, fella, I said, my wife's a good cook. I said, every day, gee, I mean, every Thursday, she serves duck. I said, what do you mean? She used to have duck, but we didn't have it. But she served duck all the time. And when she got through throwing those beans at me, I had to duck, you know. Every Friday was duck day, you know. Yeah, you know, I like to get it out of my little duck. You know, with all the pennies, the good Lord provided some sunshine in the other. Isn't he one? Now, I would say things about that if I hadn't had to eat another mash. How patiently he got down the slide and they didn't bother that inner duke for me and another night. Very important. Before I did this, I didn't say about no mash. He just another, yo, that's all. Only time I had any meat for him, it wasn't a whole thing. But hey, he went a little bit smaller than that for me. Each day, I think I have something more to appreciate from another mash. Today, I've had a one-footed. But let me tell you how I like it. You know, as the guy, if something had never happened to this man, if he'd have drank all through it, things would have been rosy and sunny, if he could have woke up with a new automobile, if he could have went down the street and never got a scratch on his automobile, and if he could have drank and never been sick, if he could never have seen no hardship in someone else's life, boy, that was, I wouldn't have been there. No, but this marriage that I met, you know, he reminded me of the time that I'd had to go. Oh, I had some, yeah. Always, I'll never say again. I always will say, there was another man that happened to go on the way. Look here. You know, I've gotten to the point where I don't sober. And I stay in that bag for a long time. I stay in that bag, and I get weak. When I get so weak, I have to eat, and I start to building up the grit. And about a week after, I'm feeling fine. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. But I remember one time, I was telling a guy about this bad thing coming on. And lo and behold, the guy, I looked at him, and he came right down. And what's up? Yeah. I know one thing you got to tell me. He said, what Bill did was up to me. He went out to, and he said, I leave this meeting, I was a plaintiff, and I said, man, it's serious. And the boy, he said, right on that. I was telling about it, but let me tell you, brother, that is gumpy. You have to be feeling good, you know. Good morning, how was that? Did you hear this story about the little boy and the so-and-so? Yeah, and all the what you know, you don't have no feeling. Hey, yeah, leg is numb, they gone. Nothing there. Rub this in, rub it. Drop my feet, I'm trying to get the feeling back, you know. No feeling to come. Pretty rough, and it's calling, you know. Then it's getting up around my old kicker, you know. I come in to get nervous. Then there's another degree. Culp geneticist fears. I believe as more people die, just as many people, they don't die of the heart. Actually, what does he do of the fears? When this thing come up to settling, you know, when it got up around my kicker, you know, and the kicker, then you'll get a little hazy, you know. The first thing you're telling, this is a man, the way I, which I, this is the way a man feels when he dies. Then I walked again to this other, you know, I said, boy, that's sick. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. This little girl, yeah. She's really, I'm sick, and I lie down there. And then after a while, I came, oh, look. Send the man. He ain't coming to tell him. He says, I believe you're sick. Let's take him to the hospital. He lets me down to the hospital, you know. There's the nurses. There's the doctors. Everybody ruck you over. What can I do for you? Here you are. They come and they'll. They don't know what to do. Now, let me tell you something. I don't know how it is now, but the average doctor didn't know anything. But I thought, you had a pulse, all right. Now, I evidently, I did, because this guy would walk away and come back. And he was there as a nurse. So in the hospital, and then they sent me down to the city hospital. The identical thing shook off. And he got to your stethoscope over here. Over here. And in the back. Getting up around here. I get you to put it on my head, buddy. Yeah. You know, I'm pretty wealthy. My dad told me I was about the wealthy young man around there. You know, all these kind of, they go to Africa for Iowa. Somebody ought to kick your head. You know, you got shagging up there. You know. Sure. You never got a stethoscope. I was lost. But here's one thing. This thing of fear. Then you have a memory. You know, they say if you're on your way out, you think of things of the past. That you think will happen. And there's just one of the things this girl came to me with this hypothermic, you know, she's going to give me a thought. Oh, I don't know. No, please don't be that. Please don't. Please. Bill, this won't hurt you. Oh, no, no. Said Bill, I will like it. We're going to send you down to the hospital. But this won't hurt you. Please, please leave me. And then she said, you're going to put me to sleep. You know, Bill. Bill, I don't. We're going to send you down to the hospital. I said, well, I need to be well. Did you give me that shot? But you know why I didn't want that shot? Let me test this. All these years I've been drinking, I've had a little gray matter left. If she'd have put me to sleep, oh, Bill would never woke up again. My resistance is gone. I know that. I can remember back up in Columbus, I was working for the state. And one time, I was standing on Long Street with Zuno in the time waiting to cross the street. And the young medical student, he came up to me and he said, Bill, I'd hate to see you get new on me. I said, what? He said, man, you don't have enough resistance to go off of Coco, Bill. The blues has got you. And I thought about saying, yeah. And another guy I thought about. You know, in this guy ditch, he's coming out of one of them bad ones, you know, born and then grown and just going on terrible. And the young wife was somewhat worried. That's her hair break thing there, laying up there and suffering from this food. And she said, I think I'd better call a doctor. Well, don't you for Sunday. That sounds right, I imagine. I would just say it that way. But anyhow, he called that doctor. That happened. I was in the 30s. And this, when I was had, I was in the 40s. And she called that doctor. Oh, very generous doctor. He knocked at this patient. He said, now, young man, he lies here. It won't hurt you. And you won't be bothered. So he gave him that shot. Very generous. And peacefully, he went to see. And that's been, I met him about 27 years ago. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, he hasn't woke up then. You know, that sounds rough, but you're so awful. And let me say, the things, the speaker, not me, but others, is a man that helps to solve another man's problem. He's a guy that wants down the same street and down the same aisle. With regardless of how much or how little. Maybe it was worse. It ends without the shame. You know, when I got here, I came by all night. The good Lord let me up. You know, sometimes in church, you know, you get all up, get happy, you know. And they think, oh, what a mighty God needs to. What a mighty God needs to. Well, I'd like for him to come to me here sometime. And you see this man that rose from the dead. You see this man, a woman that laid on the brink of death. Or somebody in his own grave. And I asked the good Lord, don't please, don't let me die. Don't let me die. That has been my plea three times. You know, the last one was pretty severe. You know, he was gracious enough. I didn't believe myself. But this one, boy, that's one that I got. Look at him, Bill. Bill, I can be for you. The nurse says, yes, we can do something for Bill. He says, no, I can't do anything for Bill. Bill, I hear everything. She says, well, we'll take you to a hospital. She meant the city hospital. It's a place. When we got there, she said, do hospital, do billy. She said, Bill, do you have any money in the pocket? Do you have enough to pay for an ambulance? Yeah. Oh, you want to call an ambulance? If anyone at your house wants you, show them that I have an ambulance. As I came in the door, my front door like that, and my children were standing like were Jetsies. And this man has, you know, a son of man, he waits. And if they're working, we lay them down. The kids sit upstairs, they make the bed, and everything was just as cool. Look, buddy. Then they played me in the bed. I said, well, I think you want to take the car out there, and you'll get to that. And I looked at my children. I would like to share the tears, but I just say, something leaves you. Whatever it was, it had left. And my wife wasn't there at the time. But if she'd have been there, there's one thing I would like for her to be. Would say, take this man away. I don't want him. Take him away. Take him away. I would have felt good in my heart. You know, you're serving the good Lord of Man within every individual as a concept. And I'm not thinking, ah, ah, be the man like he conscious. I'm going to go with that young daughter. Just a couple weeks before, she said to me, Dan, give me a dollar. I'm going to take a friend of mine to the show. Your mom, your fly. Hey, good guy. I'll give you a fuck. You matter a deal. You may think I'm made out of money. Every time I turn around, you ask me for money. And I heard what Dr. Danny. Who am I going to ask if I don't ask you? Oh, I'd like to cry there. But no tears come. I just lay there, looked at my daughter. Here I am. Probably a big invalid. I don't know. I might die most any time. But one thing's sure. Where I don't think I'll ever walk again. You know, that was something to me. Then, wasn't all folded up. And he came re-examining while he was examining the doctor. My wife came up. And, oh, man, she was cold. I don't believe she cared what I lived to die. I don't blame her because I thought there was stuffers. You know, for a long time after I came in the program, I never told her I was good. All right. I tried to keep what's true and stuff. I told her some men came over and over and over and over. For those number of years. And I knew within myself she had no reason to have any confidence. But while I was knocked up and rolled around in a bill hat and the bottle, she said to me, do you chew? I said, do you smoke? I said, you know, she's actually a truffle. She said, that mick can get into your bloodstream. It acts like water in an oil in a hose or something like that. That's what makes you nervous. And my wife, the doctor, he caught him about that, Rick. And he said, oh, it's a simple thing. But, you know, old Bill said, you'll never be bothered with me. You know, I can't talk, man. You know, when you're humble and low, you're ripped. I think you'll never have to worry about me. I drank a whiskey. I never care. I never think my lover was going to die of me. Well, I did try to die. It's about six weeks after. I'm like, you know, I went down like that. Just, you know. And I survived. No, I should have been in a fancy jail. So I gave him a couple of shots and I threw him home. That's the way it went off. You know, oh, my goodness. I thought that little piece of my coat, he wouldn't fit me anymore. And I commenced to going home. Then that little fella come through on my shoulder. He said, boy, you was going to have a house. He said, you'll hate it. There you were running in that saloon all the time. You jumped out of the house, Bill. You know what the people would think? He said, what you should do is get yourself a crank. Go to that liquor store and get yourself a crank. Take it home with you. Don't be running in those places, you know. Sure enough, I got in. It's fine. And after a while, about the third week, another one jumped up there. He said, you, you, you, give me a drummer every day. Drummer every day. There you are. Go to that liquor store twice a week. Why don't you get your cap a fit? Oh, heck, it's low there. Oh, I got him a ticket. And there was he. Back on the same old merry. Oh, yeah. You know, I want to tell you. And, man, it was rough. Now, that happened in January of 40th and Bishop. And, yeah, you know, I come in for a close intercastle. I'd have to have this blankie. I'd have to have one, please. And maybe you have never had, you know, sometimes you get a good West Virginia and you're feeling bad. You say, how are you feeling? He said, man, I got the misery. He said, man, I got the misery. He said, man, I got the misery. He said, man, I got the misery. You know, you all have pain, but you never had the misery. Well, then I developed the misery, you know. You know, when the old cop, good year cop, would say, bong, and she don't bong no more. Man, I had the misery. You see, if you would bong five times, I only got to wait one hour before that lit the place. But if you only bong once, I was all tired to roll there. That misery. You know, and I'm honest. It's pretty good, big news, yeah. So, what helped this thing off, Coach? You know, when you've been sick and, you know, been bad-shaping, you've gotten to be a man, your face is clean, you got a clean shirt on. You don't want to tell them guys out on the street, you know, or somebody, a neighbor. You want to get with these regular guys. You know, the only regular guy you can get with is in that zoo. Hello, Joe. You know, the Joe's. What the hell? You need to have a white board, you know, and waiting for the doctor to come in. You know, gee, you leave your preparations of your hand on that nice, mahogany board, you know, you labor for your mother. So, he don't want that perspiration of that to be, you know. And sometimes, you don't know you. You see that you might stand there long enough, you want to put on a 20. Now, if you go up, you put on the cream right there, you got to put on a 20. You got to put on a 20. You got to put on a 20. You got to put on a 20. You got to put on a 20. You know, he says, yeah. But when you put on a 20, just take the bottle down, Rudolph. But shine bright. Yes. You know, I'm the one that's going to buy a Coke. You know, anyhow, I have to go. And I have a sit-down, you know. On this Coca-Cola, I'm written by a Coca-Cola, you know. Dad, man, everything like you. You know one thing? I've been in the hospital. Two, three times, man. I'm going to quit, man. You real technique at the moment. And then it come till I eat. Oh, you're lying. Ah, man, kid out of this world, you know. Ah, she's just playing her swag. You know, and she said to me, can I have this tea? I said, send it to your pal, Walter. So she sat down, you know. Oh, you're lying. You know, she was mad. That must have been her last curse and her last guarantee. She didn't want to get her wrinkles, you know, when she. I sat down, so she had a little twist, you know. But she whipped and throwed it there, you know. Stop talking like that. I know something. Oh, Delilah, it was all right, you know. And, you know, when minutes, you know, I got to be a gentleman. I got. Don't want to know Delilah. I said, Delilah, I say, what did you have? You don't still make that. It's like a Coca-Cola. I could get anything. You ain't believed it. You sure? I think she got an open case and it's nothing. And she says, I am. I don't know whether you know my husband or not, but I don't believe I do. I said, yeah, what does he work? He, oh, yeah, what's that? It's a maple. I said, he does? What does he do? You know, I know. Oh, he said, he's a bear. See, I used to be a bear hop good many years ago. I can't pick up nothing. I wondered now, how old is this guy? Oh, she said, he's 23. I said, well, how old are you? I'm 23. You know. You can't talk that. Your father-in-law told you. I think you better give me an old bag. So, that was that. I cut out. You know, as I say, that was probably about a week in February. And I just commenced to grow faster and faster. I was on my way out of this world. I got to that point. Was a drink, was a month. If I wanted to sleep, I had to have a drink. If I wanted a conversation, I had to have a drink. When I came here, the first place I got was to the bar. You know, I never experienced a lot of things that I'm self-sufficient about. Only after my introduction to AA, listened to the speaker, things come into the road. I remember distinctly that. The glass was fucking black. The man in the glass. And that guy, because to me, you bought your Lancey name brand hat. I like the lead hat. Mr. The lead hat on. But you know, I like to look good, you know. You know, everybody like to have a little touch of color in their eye. My color was red. It was red all the time. I didn't care about the white. I kept the beauty. Red-eyed, he said, I helped him for a long time. And he said, I never bought a thing. Then he looked down at my pocket. He said, you bought your last knee tuck. And he said this, too. If you lose this job, you'll never get enough. That was true. But he laughed and said, I like that. He said, as long as you live, you will have to help us make a living. And that was true. That was true. I was mad. You know, but somehow or another, the good master sends a man. After that binge, I'm standing on the corner of Hiddenden and Sarah Zafferlin. There's a boy I've been watching. I knew him for a number of years. I drank with him. I spent a lot of time with this boy. And but over the couple of years, I watched him. Now, I don't know where he ate. I might have read it or something. But anyhow, this particular Monday morning, I'd been up on Arlington and I loaded up with all the things I had. And that wasn't much. I chewed up all I could put in me to tide me over. And while waiting for him, I called him and said, come here, Brielle. I said, do you belong to Alpha, Alpha, Alpha, and 9 and M? He said, do you have a drinking problem? He said, oh, but, you know, no, no, I don't have a drinking problem. He's actually sober and was brought home and was married. He says, well, now, if you have a drinking problem, I'd like to talk to you. Sometimes they do that, then they can't give me anything. I'm actually, I've been drunk over the weekend. I'm in pretty rough times. So why am I coming down to talk to you? He said, sure, sure, I'd be glad to have you. He said, I'll be there tonight. Oh, I didn't know about tonight. He said, well, how about tonight? Oh, I said, that's Tuesday night. That's my life, spare me tonight. He said, what about Wednesday night? I said, oh, that's my payday. You know, I'd have to pay my bill. You only got a couple more nights left. So they came with rain on one side, one set on the other. Yeah. You know, and I don't know why, but Colton said, and I listened to this perfect guy. He's out of Pennsylvania. And his story, I'll be you. And how is the kid that every pound has a stream of water in it? And he went on to tell me about the car and drunk, calling him a stream of water. And it closed him out on Sunday morning, laid him on the bank. And he looked at this guy and he said, well, I'll never do it like that. And lonely. And I said, well, you know, I've been on the road for two whole years. He's selling up to 83. That Medicare, there I watched him as he wound from job to job. That was, yeah, it looked like I walked in right in his step. When he moved out of the job, I could see my own step moving out of this job. Then this other boy, he told me about the history, the way he came from Pennsylvania. He also, and he taught them. And these things are, then he asked, he said, would I go to a meeting? I said, sure. But you know, in a, in a quarter back to, uh, uh, it's tall. They always tell something that has some humor and something that is in the path of a stick. And this one thing he said, you know, my wife and I were going down the sea and we seen a man over there playing the Imagineers baseball and his wife said, Ed, you seek that guy? He said, yeah, it won't be long, but wait, the captain told him, well, you know, I was at that thing. I was there, sir. I was there. I asked, then now he go to this meeting, you know, I'm all shaking Panty Lake, you know, it, you know, how things work. So much curious, Frank, you're back Saturday night. Oh, that's Saturday. I got it, but I couldn't get wrong. And, you know, every place I, I want to see, they came to see me on that 30th. Yeah, I believe it was. And every time, every place I went, I tell you guys, man, I was going to join AA. Yeah, and Virgins, they stood in the morning. I was going to join AA. I have, yeah, we've come here, but I'm going up. Something that's telling me all. So that Thursday night, I have about a pint left. And I went down the bay from that train. Things, it wasn't too good at home. It wasn't fussy or nothing like that. But, you know, maybe my wife was talking like that. You know, you got some women that just say, yeah, no, yeah, hey, you don't let go. One day, I said, you know, one thing, I think I mean, it's only ever seen your life. That's right. And I said, well, I don't know how to quit or do circle. He just talked to me. I said, yeah, no, Connie. Bury it. Don't you think my life, yeah, don't be like that, Joe. I don't know. And I don't think she ever sang. Did I say what you said? You just bought your wife a nice bird, Connie. And she ate you. So I told you, I need to eat more and more. This beautiful bird, Connie, brother of mine. Give her this bird, Connie. He said. Do you love me, honey? Looked at the bird, Cole, smiled. Yes, I love you. But anyway, I went to the deep. And this man laid the ditty fine, you know. When he come after, unfold his story, you know. He looked like every hole he went in and on down Elm Howard. I was like with him. Every old dirty bed he laid. In these hotels I was around at. I was there with a man not robbing me of so much. But holding the chains back, you know. Being a good turn, you know. Like into all those things of this guy, you know. You know, I looked at this guy and I looked at myself. I couldn't hardly sit in the chair. I wouldn't take any coffee. I would spill it. We met in the hall. And something says to me. You don't compare with this guy. Another one I jumped up on his shoulder, Chris. You know, he spent $45,000. Most barely mother's month. And job, he kept the job. But he's always in trouble. And the thing is, that man, you know, was here. This guy spent $45,000. All I had was $45,000. Yeah. Wasn't no discrediting. We both hit the gutter. It's $45,000. So, my $45,000 is gone home. It didn't make any difference to me how much, what the currency was. You got the deal over the desk. And you realize what the new boy is. And that's the last thing I got my job. Didn't tell you what to buy. But really, I say, I don't know about you. But anyhow, my story is always the same. But this time. I walked the man up. But didn't tell me for now. If that guy can't do it, I know I can. You walked him away. Which you had me. What difference did he make? He dolled and tailed off. He had a home. I had a wife. He had a wife. I have family also. But the thing, they asked me back to the second news. Would you come to the she? And I went. And I went to that she. Yeah, it was a brilliant night. And I mean, say, brilliant, he was a brilliant man. And he'd been sober for a while. That's why I don't cry. You know, you see a guy, I figure sometimes you might be able to take a dress that was up there, you know. And so, this guy, he told his story. And he'd been sober. And he crying, man. He got a beautiful job. And the driver brought quite a bit of dough. You know, and he'd been sober, cold, down a few years. Now, he's going down to the maple arbor and it's such a day giving for him. And they go into the regular procedures of elevating a man, you know, big time. Says he's waiting at O'Neill to get a casita set. While he was pressing it. Anyhow, that little fella dumps on his shoulder and says, man, you're really nervous. You know, once they found out what you should do, they went across there to Stone's Grill and get yourself a slot. That little fella said, don't you do that. Man, don't you be that crazy. That booey. On your way home, man, you'll get dumped up deep. On your way out of March, that's why. You stop until it. And get yourself behind. You take it home. And say, just before you get ready to go down, said, me and tonight, you take yourself a slot. He never made it. He never made it. Every meeting I went to, every speech, every man on each side of me had no action. A terrible thought. The man paid to get into the parking lot. I thought. And he asked me, and they were afraid of it. Did I ever? Oh, I don't think you're kind of afraid. She said, good Lord, I give you the egg. It's so much more. Did you ever thank him? Like, because I never hear about your thanking to someone, but I never hear to thank him to someone. Never. But in 18, he said, look, yeah, fella. If I give you a box tonight, you would say. Thank you. He gives you this day. You have to thank him. And he gave you so much more. Yeah. Right? So look here, Bill. All your life, you've been quitting. You were included. Ain't never going to take a nap for all year. Now, look here. I'm glad you're quitting. Can you stay till the one day? You have to point back. Can you stay till the one day? Oh, I said, go, go. I can stay till the one day. I want to. Bill, why? Crap, I'm an outcast. Yeah, I can stay till the one day. Stay till the one day. That's why I hurt me so bad, you know. I got to have a little check. How do you know it's all you have to do? If they feel that one day, you can't drink tomorrow. Well, boy, I was amazed. I can't drink tomorrow and eat one day. Then something else came in. He said, that's speaking. He said, something. I think that's really a problem. You don't have to worry about your birthday anymore. You don't have to worry about Decoration Day. You don't have to worry about the holidays. You don't know where you're going to get them or not. It's all you do. One day at a time. And when they do the good Lord's heaven through you, you can say to your faith, not today. You know, I started out that not today. It's the best answer God can fortify a man with. Couldn't just say. Tell me your friends just say, are you drinking? No, I couldn't. Boy, I'm never telling you. Well, man, I know how much liquor you can drink. You know one thing, I've been out with you, and you can do so and so. Man, I ain't never met a man who can handle a liquor like you, Dick. One little drink, come on, take one. But you know when I tell him, nothing. Nothing. He didn't knock the gate. The conversation ceased. Every time that I drank, that I would never take a drink as long as I lived, and I lived it. Don't think I don't know how many times I walk into my house, I've skipped of everything, and my wife's sitting there shaking and crying. I'll probably be at the worrying board, you know, tears streaming down her cheeks and so. And that thought will get into my heart, and I'll tell you after that. I'll never beat her, but I did. But you didn't thought I'd let that in. You told me one day I'd come. One day. You know, I ate a little over 30 years, I'll tell you. Only one day. You know, and that thing of getting up and, well, I rolled out of bed on my knees, not because I'm a good guy. The trouble thing is you got to keep acting it. You got to keep on acting it. You know, when I was so stated with the drug, I mean, I think I didn't want no guy. Well, you met me, any of you met me. You're on your way to Idris, and I'm going down to Pete's, and you say, come on, Delvis. So, and I don't want no, I want to go to Pete's. Now, you fall into our relation. When you come back, you meet me at Pete's, because Pete's is where I would go. And that guy didn't want to go to Pete's. He wanted to go to Pete's. He wanted to go to Pete's. He wanted to go to Pete's. He wanted to go to Pete's. He wanted to go to Pete's. He wanted to go to Pete's. He wanted to go to Pete's. He wanted to go to Pete's. He get that, get that, Delvis. Now, I don't understand why he goes to Pete's. Yeah? Yeah, we go to Pete's now. You know, it makes you eat, but you got to find food. You know, like the little boy say, come on with a black eye, you know. And his daddy could try to get that black eye. But nobody, of course, thought. Maybe what you want to do, you know, nobody's going to hand you anything. Okay. But I want to tell you something. I know. You knew. Let me tell you. You hadn't begun to live. Sure, you're going to have a hard time. Man, yeah. You're going to have plenty of it. But I tell you, it won't be hard. Ain't so tough. You've got faith in me in no corner. You know, things that happen, it makes me cry a little bit. Shit carries the battery, you know. I keep thinking, but before, you know, things didn't happen right with me. Being covered, I said, oh, they know they did that. Heart had no respect for people. None were there. Every man that's born in this good world has a problem. It's not easy to be by crying with people. And let me say this. All of you are your friends. I like to see, again, so many men in those buildings that I felt, you know, when I had to roll, tell them, get out of the way, see, I can buy you. And it's five. My low boat is gone. I have to ask you to give me a car, man. Yeah. But I have to deal with it a little bit different. I'll never have a dollar. If someone like me, oh, heck. And there'll never be any good. If you're not there, you're not there. And I'll be. You get every man's path. You're an individual that he put on us. Not for your purpose, but for his purpose. And tell him the right. You have a different person than I have. But let me tell you something. About the alcohol, you know, that you show the fundamental cause the cement way of life. I don't envy any man with a big job. I don't. I don't envy any man with a big job. I don't envy any man that has a lot of money. Every time the good Lord gives a guy more, he takes them away. The only fly boy. I don't worry about nothing, Charlie, don't let Nick worry and he don't fall off the stage. Yeah, it's just like the story. I go down home, my wife, you put brother with Jim Jackson, cause Jim Jackson ain't no good. I do not listen here. Let me tell you something about Jim Jackson. Jim Jackson is a friend of mine and I can give him anything. Jim Jackson, you know, it could be thing about Jim Jackson. He never had it. It's so. Yeah. But. It's. It's all we got to do. Now that you've been in the bit, I can work every day. I go in before me job and put my feet on his damn right. Charlie, now you, you to put me, but I'm put. You know, I look at you, I go, where did you have my thing here? You hear me? You know, we have a lot of fun before we couldn't. Oh, you ain't no good either, Paul. I carry it every day. You work for me. And when I get a big, big man, I will accrue, but we have my thing. Not that. I got that to move. Henry Ford, you know, I need to sit on that, do, you know, get drunk. I said, well, I don't matter. Every boy didn't make it on the move. You only report it six years old. And I got a few years to go. You know, I got 46 years. So I want to do it. I call, but see, when I came into AA and ever outside, I was thinking about his money. When that's coming, they, they are dying. Just for six, seven and four. All he wanted to do was make an automotive. If he knew that he had to feed all these employees that he had, he wouldn't have that job. No, you wouldn't have anything. The good Lord didn't even a flame. It got a Tom. That's all you want to be. And all I want that I may let come through to my fellow man. I thank you. Thank you.