Favorite Sentence in the Big Book Is Four Words — It Works, It Really Does – Tommy M.

Okay, is everybody happy, joyous, and free? Yes, we are. Good. My name is Owen Jones, and I'm an alcoholic. Welcome to the Monday Night Blue Chip Speakers Meeting at the Napa Club, where a member of Alcoholics Anonymous with one year or more of sobriety tells his or her story. Hi, my name's Terry. I'm an alcoholic. Welcome to the Napa Monday Night Blue Chip Speakers Meeting. Our hope is that many alcoholic men and women in our room tonight and listening later on aablutipspeakers.org desperately in need will hear our speaker. And we believe that it is only by fully disclosing ourselves and our problems that any of us shall be persuaded to say, yes, I am one of them, too. I must have this thing. Well, tonight I have the privilege. I have the privilege to introduce our speaker. I've known him for many, many, many years, and he is a miraculous man in many ways. And me personally, he's shown me that there is a great, fun way of life after this despair. I think that we will all enjoy the speaker tonight as I give you Thomas from the Dawson Group. Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. My name is Thomas Charles Moran, and I am an alcoholic. Hey, y'all. You can call me Tommy. It's always an honor when you're asked to tell your story. I have to tell y'all it's my least favorite thing to do. And as I was walking up here, I thought, you know, I should have maybe gone to the bathroom. But I didn't, and that'll be okay. I'm dead serious about my recovery and about sobriety, but I do not wear it like a tight cloak. I think of... Since a few... Humor serves us well. And God knows I'd just be crying all the time if I couldn't laugh, so... If I say something that offends you, good. And if I say something that you disagree with, call your sponsor. And if I say something that you like, well, I appreciate it. My sobriety date is August 22, 1997. And I don't say that out of pride. I say it out of genuine humility. And... Amazement. I am living proof that anybody can get and stay sober. If you think you can't, I'm proof that you can. I'm a product of the court system. I was court-ordered not once, not twice, but three times by the same judge. Judge Moran. We have the same last name. And I used that to my advantage, I assure you. Until she started acting like I was giving her family a bad name. And then we sort of... Split ways. But I am grateful that I haven't had to pick up a drink or a mind-altering substance so far today. Because I used to live a life that I didn't know how to live without something. Just a little something to get me up. Just a little something to get me by. Just a little something to take that edge off. Just a little something to make it okay for me to be with y'all. Because my core issue is and always will be... Is fear. I'm fearful of you. I'm fearful of what you want. And I'm fearful of what you might do to me. And I'm even more afraid that you might find me out. That you might see behind this facade that I so gleefully put up so I can be with y'all. The Japanese people, they're amazing for a lot of reasons. But they have this theory that... People have... People have three faces. There's the face that you show to the public. There's the face that you show to your family. And then there's the face that you never show to anybody. I think all three of mine I didn't want to show to anybody. Because I was afraid that you would find me not enough. That was my deal. No matter what I did, I wasn't going to be enough. No matter how much I accomplished, it wasn't going to make it okay. Okay. It wasn't okay. And some of y'all have heard Earl H.. And I've heard him speak a lot. And I love it when he says, You know, in the first grade, I'm pretty sure I could have used a drink. And I get that because, man, I've never, ever felt comfortable in my own skin. It just was a little too tight or a little too loose. But I could just never be okay being with me. So I learned... I learned at an early age how to medicate that. And I qualify for probably every 12-step program on earth. But I believe in the single list of purpose. I love seeing that sign. And I will honor that. But I have you know, I never met any substance that I did not like and abuse. And I was an equal opportunity user. We used to have this thing. I owned a bar. I owned a sandbar and grill down there on Piedmont for 20 years. And we had this thing called Sober October. And what would happen is the bartenders and owner, bar owners around the area would put $100 in the pot. And whoever could stay sober the longest got all the money. So in about five days, I'd just go, I'm out. Because I proved to myself I could go to five days. And if you cannot drink for five days, surely you don't have a problem. Alcoholics was that guy that I saw going up and down Piedmont with all his possessions in a shopping cart begging for cigarettes. That's what an alcoholic was. But I know now today an alcoholic can be anybody. It's an equal opportunity disease. It knows no social strata. It cares not. It is truly like that rapacious creditor that they talk about in the book. And all it wants is alcohol. Us dead. Doesn't care how it happens. And it does not mourn someone as soon as it gets them and it kills them. You know what it does? It looks around the room and goes, who's next? I don't want to be that guy. I don't want to be that guy. I drank until I had seizures. I actually said I will do this until I die. Well, I did twice. A normal person might go, hey, maybe I shouldn't be doing that. That wasn't my reaction. So they tell you to say what it was like, what happened, and what it's like now. It was great. Then it wasn't. And this is better. So thanks. Thanks for letting me share. I wish it was that easy. You know, along with my alcoholism, I have a little thing called ADD. And I'm pretty sure I've always had that. And I also have neuromuscular disease that you can't see. Okay. But it left me a little reminder. I have ptosis in this eye. And it's from myasthenia gravis. I don't know if you've ever heard of that. It's weaknesses of the muscle and da-da-da, blah, blah, blah. And I share that because it's going to be a big part of my story when I get all leathered up here in a minute. Alcohol did not take a single thing from me. Not one. I willingly gave it to it. I gave it everything I had. Because it was the only friend I thought I had. It worked. And it worked for a long time. And then it didn't work at all. And it's never worked again. But it didn't stop me from trying. I grew up in an alcoholic family over here in Brookhaven by Silver Lake. That kind of family looked very nice from the street. You know, nice cars, nice house. All the kids dressed. Had their teeth. But you close that door. And it was madness and mayhem. Because both my parents were alcoholics. And I was, they say, a gift from God. I say that was a mistake. Because I was seven years younger than my sisters. And my parents just sort of checked out after they parented them. They were done. I was a boy. They just sort of like threw me out of the house and, see you later. And I like that. I like being a child of the streets. Back in the 60s. It was awesome. You got in trouble, the cops would just bring you home. What's the matter with this take you to jail stuff? Well, they took us once. There used to be a liquor store behind Lenox Square. And we got caught getting liquor there at 16. That's the first time I got thrown in jail. First time I got drunk and passed out and blacked out. I was 14. My parents were having a cocktail party. And, you know, how do you know you're a blackout drinker? How do you know that? If you blacked out, how do you know? That was always the question. I don't know. And then I realized I didn't remember any of the 80s. So, I guess I was just blacked out. But, when I was 14, I come to naked on the bathroom floor with my mom and dad standing over me and all their friends in this bathroom. Do y'all remember being 14 and how shy you could be then? Think about it. And you're naked? Oh, my God. It was horrible. I'm surprised I didn't become a serial killer. But, that was my first experience with throwing up, blacking out. And, I talked to this guy yesterday. And, he had a similar experience. He had to go to the hospital. They had an alcohol poisoning. And, he goes, and I never drank again. And, I looked at him. I went, you're stupid. I didn't say that. But, that's what I thought. Because, I couldn't wait to do it again. You know what I mean? It was like, oh, yeah. Let's drink until we're stupid and forget where we are and don't have any clothes on. And, yeah, I'm in. Would I sign up? So, this is what alcohol did for me. I was determined to make it pay because it took my family from me. It took my childhood. It took my mom and dad. I learned to cook because they wouldn't. So, that was a plus. But, I just, all I wanted was somebody to tell me I couldn't do something. You know, just somebody's care enough to say, no, you can't do that. I never heard no. Not ever. I heard you better not a lot. But, not no. So, alcohol, with me being a co-conspirator, I fell off an 80 foot cliff and lived to tell about it. I dove from 30 feet up into 2 feet of water. I'm an inch shorter. Because of that one. I tanked my college career. Borrowed a fraternity brother's car. Had this blind date with this beautiful little girl from Atlanta. And, in a blackout, bounced that Volkswagen off a curb 15 feet up into the air into a tree and broke her back. I walked away without a scratch. I came to and I was on a porch saying, I think I've been in an accident. And, when the police came, we're at the hospital. And, I was so distraught. And, he said, what happened? And, this is when I became a professional liar. I said, the car ran us off the road. But, was it true? But, it served my purpose. It served my needs. And, I didn't get a ticket. But, I was taking a full load of classes. And, instead of going to the dean and withdrawing, emergency withdrawal, I just never went. So, I went to school again and went to the hospital every day. I got six F's and that pretty much will tank a college career. So, you know, God works in mysterious ways. Kept the jerk from being an attorney. So, that's not all bad. So, you know, we do what we do and we get what we get. And, the party's on. And, I'm in the restaurant bar business. I worked all over Texas with daddy's money. And, they used to call me daddy. They used to send me back here. I worked at Billy's and Buckhead, if any of y'all remember those days. God bless your livers. And, then I opened up my own place. And, it's an alcoholics dream job. Seriously. That and tending bar, either one. So, you know, I think I'm all that. And, I got a bag of chips. And, you know, I'm doing a deal. And, I meet this pretty little girl. And, one night, I decided to invite 40 of my best friends. And, I hired a bus. And, we're going to go bar hopping for New Year's Eve. I don't know about y'all. But, me, it was the pre-party parties that were really kicking my tail. You know. And, I'll tell you how party season was in my life. See if I can remember it right. Labor Day, September. We had Labor Day. And, then that sort of rolled into Halloween. Thanksgiving. Christmas. New Year's. Yee. Valentine's. My birthday. What's the one after? St. Patrick's Day. Everybody's Irish. Kiss me. And, then there's another national holiday. Easter. Memorial Day. Fourth of July. Now, it's September again. So, I mean, it's just like, you know, come up for air. . . Get drunk. Get whatever. Go back under. Submarine. And, I had been up for maybe six weeks before that New Year's Eve party. And, it was hot in this house. It was cold outside. And, I was greeting people. Letting them in. Greeting people. Letting them in. Hot and cold. Hot and cold. Next thing I know, I come to. And, they are beating the crap out of my chest trying to get my heart started. And, I threw my first seizure. And, as I came to, there happened to. . . When you dial 911. . . Like, you all probably know this. A policeman shows up. Not just an ambulance. But, a policeman. And, that was the first person that talked to me. He goes, Mr. Moran. Mr. Moran. Have you been doing any drugs? And, I don't know why I said this. Because, I'm such a smart ass. I said, yeah, heroin. And, I passed right out. Now, I had never, ever done that drug. Ever. I mean, I took care of that later. But. . . You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know. I had. . . Up to that point. . . I had not done that. And, so. . . I came to. . . And, they said. . . We're going to put you in an ambulance. And, I said. . . No. I didn't know this. If you refuse to go. . . They can't make you go to the hospital. Because, I'm so smart. And, I said. . . No. That's alright. I've got a party to go to. Well. . . What I didn't know was. . . It was like rats jumping off a sinking ship. people going out windows and screens kicked out and just mayhem but five people stayed so me and five idiots get on this bus and that little pretty girl was one of them and uh and man i don't know if you've ever had a grandma seizure first off i tried to butt my tongue off so it was swollen and hurt and every muscle in my body hurt i don't mean just kind of hurt i mean hurt and that pretty little girl goes don't you ever get tired of this i went i'm going to do it till it kills me and she goes it just did it and i went no it did it but it did so that was the first one i had another one let me tell you the best place to have a grandma seizures in court because if you have one in court you get to go first because they don't want you to have a grandma seizure they don't want you to have a grandma seizure because they don't want you to have a grandma seizure because they don't want you to have a grandma seizure dying in their courtroom so i got a little over amped celebrating going to court and uh sitting next to my wife and she goes it was you started kicking the bench in front of you it sounded like and it's just dead silent sound like the loudest sound she has ever heard and she goes and then you fell out well i came to and i hear this voice go mr moran are you all right and i said without thinking no but i use a word before that f no and then i realized it was the judge oh lord and she goes it's i'm going to continue your case and i knew i would get some sympathy if i went through with it so i said no ma'am if it's all right with you i'm here you're here let's just get this over with and so i'm up there and i'm doing my little song and dance because i've talked my way out of it twice before and i had no doubts i was going to do that again and uh next thing i know i'm in handcuffs and the prosecutor is saying all these mean things about me and talking three to five and just language i didn't like and uh and then uh she said your honor it's apparent to me mr moran is on some kind of substance and i said how dare you i excuse me if anybody in here has it i apologize i have epilepsy i forgot to take my medication today now i don't have epilepsy nor have i ever had it but i thought i did the first time i had that seizure because i went to the doctor and told him that and he did all these tests and then he pushed his dictionary across the desk at me because mr moran i want you to look up the word moderation because it's apparent to me you don't have it in your dictionary which is funny and it's true but what he did realize is he had a full-blown alcoholic addict in front of him that moderation is not ever going to be part of my vocabulary ever so um that prosecutor saying those mean things and i pulled that ace out of the hole and uh i walked again and i'm thinking just as i'm turning to go i'm thinking these are the stupidest people i've ever dealt with and then she did it she goes because mr moran's numerous and this is over a five year period y'all um we want him to take a drug screen every week and then i went man all those people at the bar always talking about being drug screens i'll just ask them what to do and everything will be great you know the party's on and so um i asked them they told me i went to have my first drug screen i came back positive for stuff i hadn't even done oh my god almighty this is a nightmare and i'm driving down the road going up to uh going up past 81 11 to the courthouse and i've got that piece of paper in my hand i'll throw it out the window and i get there and uh doing my little song and dance and showing on my court papers that i've been signing left-handed or just anybody i knew he would sign this for me and um that prosecutor same one she insisted on seeing my drug screen and i went that started this week i i thought it started today and guess what they did they let me go and that's when i realized they didn't really want me to be in trouble what they wanted me was to stop being crazy they wanted me to stop acting the fool they wanted me to be just a citizen so i started going to meetings online it was awesome you could go you could go in your underwear you could smoke during them you could even drink during them if you wanted to uh but i couldn't because all those people told me how to beat those uh screens lied and so i i sobered up kind of my fog is still pretty thick now i'm calling the aa hotline trying to convince this guy i'm not an alcoholic like he cared but we had numerous conversations and just fast forward real quick i was sitting in 81 11 one day and i was like i'm not an alcoholic i'm not an alcoholic i hear him speak he's in the meeting i'm in and i went up to him afterwards he goes i know who you are i went oh dude i'm so sorry so he's gone on to a big meeting in the sky but he was such a great guy especially about that too because i was just out of control but i befriend these two people well a lot of people actually online and uh they were saying f to f and sponsor big book all that stuff i didn't understand and i would just act like i didn't read it because you're not talking you're reading it so i just i'd wait till somebody else was stupid enough to go what's that and so you know i get a lot of my answers meant like that because i still had to prop up that false side y'all know the one i'm talking about the one that makes it okay to be me and um anyway this guy comes to town his bottom was a crack pipe and a pair of shorts and she was a hooker and uh they had nothing but a shopping cart but now he's this big plumbing magnet guy in dallas fort worth i'm an awesome guy huge i mean he's like six eight and 300 pounds just huge like a linebacker he comes to my house and he talks to me for about five minutes he goes you know you know t i've met a lot of people in my time in aa well i bet you have he goes i've never met anybody more full of it than you he goes go get that car well i forgot to tell y'all before they got there i would go to 81 11 because i knew where it was and i'd stand outside and i was the unofficial breeder people would go into the meetings i said hey good to see you i'm glad you're here enjoy the meeting and then they would leave they'd come out hey how was the man i'm glad you're here good to see you because i wanted these people that were coming to think i actually went to meetings there now i could have gone inside you know but i'm crazy so but i just want i want people to know my face so they'll act like i go inside because i'm a lot of people i'm a lot of people i'm a lot of people you know i grew up in a family that never thought the story was good enough until you embellished it so that's really hard for me still so if i have lied to you so far i do not know it i don't think i have but you know you never know so anyway he drives me back to 81 11 and he puts me right my spot my greeter my greeter spot he goes stand right here and don't move and i'm thinking boy i know how to do that i've done that for two weeks and he comes back and he's got this little short brown man with him and he goes this is your sponsor do everything he says or i will come back to town and kick your behind and i'm thinking this guy means it so i met duane and then we went to that other aa clubhouse the waffle house and we immediately started this no ifs ands or buts just jumped right in and i i'm a man i'm amazed at people that come in and say well i saw those steps on the wall or i saw those traditions i guarantee i was probably in there six months and never realized they were on the wall i called them one day and i said you know all that stuff they read before the meeting did you know it was in this book i'm serious i mean that fog was so thick and he would just laugh and hang up um bless his heart he's still my sponsor uh so i'm on this road to recovery and i'm doing the deal and i'm on fire you know how people get on fire for aa 12 steps and i still owned a bar i didn't really have to work so i just went to meetings all day long i mean just i i went to him like i was an alcoholic you know how you can't get enough you know when you're when you're drinking you just can't get enough i just need a little bit more i was that way for recovery i just need a little bit more just a little bit more do i have the time oh you hit me in that face i was oh my god i gotta get sober um so you know a lot of people's story the worst things that happened were before they got here was not my experience my experience is the worst things that ever happened to me happened to me in recovery and i used to think god got me sober so i could repair my marriage what he did was got me sober so i didn't kill anybody when she divorced me so i didn't act a fool and go crazy so i didn't kill myself when she took my kids away from him it hurt so bad my body would ache and uh you know how a lot of people lose everything before they get here i have to do it different i lost everything at three years three to five years sober um i couldn't i couldn't do that bar anymore so i sold it um i was teaching sunday school that's pretty humorous in itself and uh my co-teacher said hey i'm gonna i'm gonna get a real estate company going and uh we're hiring agents we'll pay for you to go to school and i went thank you god and i went i got my real estate license and the market tanked so you know uh i didn't have anybody paying the bills i turned right the economy turned left so i got to experience foreclosures um assets uh seizures and um repossessions before it became popular you know i was head of the curve so and i was okay i said fine god take it take it all you've taken my family you've taken my business you've taken everything i've owned i still have my health i still have my sobriety and that's all i need then he took my health and it started with just a little a little hand shimmer like that and then some days it would be so bad i would be giving out the chips and i would have to hold on to the table at 81 11 and it would just be banging and of course uh i'm not going to go to the doctor because i'm a guy so i let a doctor's wife diagnose me in the group you know and i love aa we we think we've been to harvard medical school sometimes or or legal advice it's just incredible i love alcoholics and so uh i just self-diagnosed myself with mechanics palsy because i got some hot oil in my eye when i changed it on my truck guess what there's no such thing i didn't know that it sounded good what's wrong with you i got mechanics palsy it's just manly so um i'd go finally i was at um my old home group mount vernon sitting at the picnic table out front of the group and this guy walks up to me he goes my mom owns a treatment facility do you know anybody who needs a job i start rolling through all the guys i work with and stuff then i remembered i didn't have any gas in my car and i had two dollars in my pocket i said no i think i might be interested in doing that because my um real estate career was not taking off quite like i expected and i'm burning through everything i mean just burning through money left and right and uh so i started working in treatment as a mental health assistant taking taking them to meetings just interacting with them having meetings in the house i loved it i never thought about working in treatment never mind and uh then when i left that job three years later i was the assistant program director and then she fired me and uh that made me mad and so i sat at my house and pouted but i had to move because i'd lost the house so but i got a house up at the lake it was nice and so i'm sitting up there and i get an unemployment and it's not really taking care of me and uh i'm fishing all day and just goofing off all the time going to meetings the coming group it was awesome and uh i have a friend he's happens to be here and i had referred him to a place called mar years earlier when he was struggling he goes why don't you call them why don't you contact them and i don't know some of y'all know about mar but in the treatment business mar is the gold standard they are the ones that everybody else is measured against and i'm thinking man man they're they're they're real i'm just sort of like not and uh he kept on he kept on and i finally went all right i'll go up there and and i went up there and i met with doug brush and i loved him immediately he is the guy i want to be when i grow up uh he's younger than me that would probably be a bonus but um he is not one of us but he is if you know what that means i always tease them and i said if you drank with me doug i could help you push through that stopping part so um he said he didn't have a job but would i be willing to do volunteer training i said sure i'm not doing anything so i do volunteer training and about halfway through and he goes okay we're gonna hire you so i don't know what that all man is all in god's hands and so they not only hired me they paid for me to go back to school and become certified and all that and right about the time I started getting sicker and sicker. I don't mean just kind of sick. I mean, like, can't lift your arms up sick, can't control your head muscles, can't chew food, can't breathe. A crisis in myocardial infarction is the muscles stop working and how people die, the muscles that control your lungs just stop. And you literally drown in a room full of air. What's one of my hugest fears? Drowning. How many of those crisis episodes did I have? More than I'd like to admit. And they sent me to a breath specialist. And she goes, you ran outside, didn't you? And I went, yes, I did. She goes, there's no more air out there than there is in your house. And I went, that might be true, but it was like 20 degrees colder. And I was hoping that would just sort of like startle my system into working. She goes, well, two things are going to happen. Three, actually. She goes, you're going to not breathe and die. Or you'll pass out and die. Or... Or you'll just start breathing. And then she gave me some techniques. Because the harder you try, the less you can. So anyway, man, I'm mad at God now. Let me tell you, he has taken everything. I'm still not using it. I'm still not drinking. Thinking about it. Thinking about it pretty hard. And I mean, I'm just railing at him. You know, those morning sessions on my knees are no longer pleasant. I mean, we're going toe-to-toe. And I'm just telling him what I think about what he's given me. And I'm getting sicker and sicker and sicker and sicker. And I have probably the roughest week I've ever had. And I just went, you know what, God, if this is it. The teacher at the school asked me not to come back. I was scaring the other students. At work, they were thinking about putting me on a leave of absence. Because I'm scaring the clients and the staff. And... It's just... It's just not good. Y'all want to know what true humility is? Being in a men's public restroom and have to ask a stranger to help you unzip or zip up your pants. Because I did not have the strength to do it. And just a quick aside. Not one time did anybody ever say no, they wouldn't help me. Not once. Well, once. But that was in a parking lot, so they didn't come. I'm pretty sure this bus driver, she was huge, too. And I needed somebody to help me open my car door. And I asked her if she'd help. I think she thought I was doing a Ted Bundy. And I was thinking, man, you couldn't even get in this car. That resentment, I need to let go of. So I'm sick. I'm sick and tired. And I go, I'm going to take care of business. I'm just going to do what I know to do. And I'm going to end it here. And my kids... My kids don't know I'm sick. Because I wouldn't tell them. Hardly anybody knew I was sick. And... I'm laying in my bed up at the lake. And then I just started laughing. I couldn't lift my arms. Matter of fact, I couldn't move anything. If I could have reached over to that drawer, I don't think I had the strength to open it. And if I had the strength to open it, I'm pretty sure I could not have lifted that hoglug up out of there. Because it was heavy. It was a big .357. And God, if I had gotten it out, I know I couldn't have cocked it a little longer. Pulled the trigger. And that's when, you know, sometimes we just have those moments. I felt God's genuine presence twice. And this was the second time. The first time was when he helped me deliver my baby and my daughter in an emergency home birth. That'll sober you up, by the way. You ever drink yourself sober? Man, what a waste of money. And at that moment, I had that epiphany. And I said, I get it, God. I understand. You've been doing your job. I haven't been doing mine. Please forgive me for what I was thinking about doing. You all can call him a higher power if you want to. I just call him God. I said, I promise I'll start doing what I need to do. I'll do my part. You've been doing your part. And I didn't get up and walk off of my bed like Lazarus did. But I'll tell you one thing. Every day I got a little bit better. Every day. A little bit. A little bit better. I was taking 36 pills a day. Today. Today I take zero. I've been in remission, gosh, eight years now. I still have it. You want to hear a joke? They don't know what causes it. And there's no cure for it. Y'all got that. It's called alcoholism. Nobody knows what causes that. There's no real cure for it. There's treatment. Y'all know? Treatment. Did y'all know there's a chapter in here how it works? There is a solution. Did y'all know that? Do you know if you do it, you get better? So, well, you could be better than me. I am a satisfied customer of 12 Steps and Recovery. That and my misunderstanding have given me truly a life worth living and a genuine purpose. The two things I always wanted. The two things that I lacked. The things that I tried to fill up. That hole with boats, cars, money, girls, houses, stuff. Never, never completed me. God does. I didn't know that the lack of God was my dilemma. I didn't realize I wasn't God until I got here. I didn't realize how much I needed a God of my understanding until I got here. So, I'm glad y'all are here. And I'm glad I got to be here with y'all. And if you don't hear anything else tonight, hear this. My favorite sentence in this book. It works. It really does. Thank y'all. Thank you, Tommy. That was really inspiring. I really appreciate the opportunity to be here tonight and hear your story. A lot of it sounded like me. Especially the growing up part. We've asked Norm to come up and do the chips for us. They're right here. My name's Norm. I'm an alcoholic. This is the chip system we have to celebrate our quantity of time and hopefully the quality at some point. Start with a white chip. If you're sick and tired of being sick and tired, you might need a white chip. Anybody want a white chip? Yeah! Silver chip for 30 days and 30 nights in a row. A red chip for 90 days. Three months. A yellow chip for six months. That's a long time. Green chip for nine months. And a blue chip for years. Years or a month. Terry! I'm Terry and I'm an alcoholic. It's a Friday day. It's February 20th, 1990. Thank you, Tommy, for your story. One of the gifts of being around a little while is you get to see people grow up. And I'll keep it short. If it didn't work, I wouldn't be here. I would not be here. So, thanks a lot. Kiss the dog.