Step 2 Hit When He Saw It Working for Others – Dave R.

About This Speaker Tape

Valentine's Day, 1978. A garage in Fremont. Dave R. is screaming at the ceiling with a gun in his ear, ready to pull the trigger, when his dog bolts out a broken door. Chasing the animal down the street, Dave finds himself spread eagle in a cul-de-sac, held at gunpoint by a neighbor who is a cop. He describes this moment as "incomprehensible demoralization," feeling lower than the pavement while his children watch.

Dave’s wreckage is heavy: a childhood of resentment, a tour as a Marine door gunner in Vietnam where he fired into friendlies, and the cold memory of murdering prisoners. He spent years as a "bulletproof" alcoholic, embezzling $25,000 from his father and abandoning a wedding. After failing multiple times to white-knuckle sobriety, Dave finally surrendered to a Higher Power. Today, he navigates a brain tumor and seizures, treating them not as crises, but as events.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:45 Laughter: Dave jokes about lying as a character defect.
• 3:15 Childhood trauma and the resentment toward his brother.
• 7:20 Vietnam experience: The adrenaline rush and the use of heroin to stay 'bulletproof'.
• 9:10 The trauma of friendly fire and the guilt of his pilot's death.
• 13:40 The Valentine's Day suicide attempt and the role of his dog.
• 16:10 First encounter with AA and the struggle with anonymity.
• 19:30 The 'mean guys' in AA and the hard truth about wanting to stay sober.
• 22:15 The turning point: A conversation with a priest and the final drink on March 9, 1982.
• 25:40 Working Step 4 and the confession of embezzling $25,000 from his father.
• 28:50 The emotional wreckage of a divorce and false accusations of child abuse.
• 31:10 Step 9: Making amends to his daughter and the reconciliation.
• 35:20 Dealing with a brain tumor and seizures through the lens of the 12 Steps.