The Concede That Happens at the Innermost Self – Tom

About This Speaker Tape

Tom I. maps out a life that swung from the absolute bottom to the highest levels of institutional authority. After a youth spent in a blur of moonshine and 'speed,' Tom's descent culminated in a blackout where he struck and killed two people leading to a five-to-fifteen-year sentence in a Michigan State Penitentiary.

He describes the prison as a 'zoo' of negativity but it became the site of his surrender. Through a prison AA group and a raw cathartic Fourth Step inventory Tom dismantled the charade of his life. His recovery trajectory is an anomaly: he went from a convicted felon to a rehab supervisor and eventually to a prison warden.

Now retired he returns to the system as a volunteer arguing that the program isn't a place to wither and die but a design for living that keeps a man in his 44th year of sobriety more dynamic than he was in his youth.

Topics

Timestamps

• 0:00 Introduction and a funny story about a disastrous 'brown dinner' banquet.
• 5:15 Tom discusses the 'slice of life' nature of alcoholics and the shared experience of coming back from the brink.
• 12:40 The 'overrated' man: Tom describes his pattern of getting high-level jobs and immediately sabotaging them with alcohol.
• 20:10 The turning point: Tom recounts the blackout and the accident that killed two people.
• 25:30 Life in the Michigan State Penitentiary and the first encounter with a prison AA group.
• 32:15 The 'magnetic spirit' of Shy W. and the early days of prison recovery.
• 38:40 The 'inside job': Tom explains the difference between admission and conceding to his innermost self.
• 42:10 Step 4: Tom describes the cathartic experience of writing his moral inventory on a prison bunk.
• 48:50 The 'zoo' experience: Tom's time as a 'speed mechanic' and his struggle with insomnia.
• 55:20 The miracle of restoration: Tom's journey from ex-con to prison warden.
• 62:10 Discussion on the importance of the home group and sponsorship.
• 66:45 Closing thoughts on staying 'on fire' in the 44th year of recovery.